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I had come to a point where it felt like no matter what I said or did, I would never get Killian to understand me.
Beg for salvation.
I did, on my knees, every night…
Atone for your sins. Repent.
Marrying Killian and staying in this relationship was my atonement.
Redemption is in the hands of the one you have wronged.
Too bad for me, the man I had wronged hated me with every ounce of his being. I had come to understand that maybe, I would never find the redemption I was seeking. Not in this lifetime anyway.
This castle was cursed, I had begun to believe, and I’d only end up like the other souls who were trapped here. Just another unfinished story, another ghost roaming within these walls.
My door crashed open and I startled, practically jumping off the bed. Killian stalked inside with mad purpose. His long legs ate the distance between the door and my bed quickly, his face a masked of pure, unadulterated rage. His eyes were pitch-black and his jaw tightened, the muscle in his left cheek ticking under the pressure.
“Julianna.” His frosty voice echoed in my ears, and I froze in my tracks. “Did you come into my room last night?”
My eyes widened and my heart dipped to my stomach. Something shifted inside of me, an invisible vise squeezing my heart with thorny vines and I wanted to break free… but I couldn’t.
Killian knew…
Last night had been my secret to bear – something impulsive I had done, but I didn’t think it’d come back to me, chasing me with its ugly truth, or that I would have had to face it so soon.
My lack of response was answer enough for him. He approached me, his presence reeking of brutal vengeance and merciless death. As he bypassed the coffee table, he grabbed for the knife that sat on the tray of fruits.
A choked sound escaped my throat and I stumbled back against the wall. I put a hand out to ward him off, but Killian lunged forward, crowding into my personal space and pinning me against the wall of my room with the length of his body.
Warm and solid.
Both my protector and my tormentor.
I quivered when he placed the tip of the knife against my throat, holding it there. A soft caress, but so goddamn deadly. His dark eyes were almost inhuman with mania and restrained violence.
And for the first time, I truly feared Killian. He was capable of doing anything but the only reason he had kept me alive for this long was because of our marriage contract.
But now, I had gone and crossed over a boundary that had been put there when Killian had left me at the altar.
My skin rippled with goosebumps, and I gulped, hard. The knife shifted against my skin and my breath stuttered.
“You stole something that didn’t belong to you, Julianna,” Killian hissed, his hot breath fanning over my veil. “You shouldn’t have fucking done that.”
Even through the fear swallowing me up – even with the guilt coursing through my body, there was anger simmering in the pit of my stomach. At the total unfairness of all of this.
I wanted to scream at him to look into my eyes, to see the real me.
But Killian was so blinded by his pain and his need for vengeance, he couldn’t see what was right in front of him.
“Why not?” I found myself saying before I could think twice of it. “I’m your wife, aren’t I? I took vows in front of God and witnesses. You are my husband… and you’re wrong. I didn’t steal that kiss. You gave it to me and I took it because it is rightfully mine. That kiss belonged to me.”
Oh, the glacial look on his face and in his soulless eyes.
His lips curled up in a snarl. “I save your life once and you suddenly think you can do whatever you want, say whatever you want. I don’t know if I should call you brave or a fool.”
A wave of shame ran through me, digging under my skin and filling my veins with acid, but I pushed it away. I pushed it all away – the guilt, the shame, the disappointment, all the pain and despair – and I said things I couldn’t take back.
Words that turned me into the villain and gave Killian another reason to hate me more.
He had been right – I was self-destructing.
“And why are you such a hypocrite?” I let out a humorless laugh and the tip of the knife pressed harder into my flesh, not enough to break skin, but enough to warn me. “Didn’t you do the same in the labyrinth? Why is it you can kiss me whenever you damn well want to but I can’t do the same? Then, I was your wife but now, I’m the villain. You are the most hypocritical man I’ve ever met in my life.”
