Page 42 of A Vow Of Hate


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You have never looked at me with anything more than respect, only because we took vows and for I am your wife.

Your eyes lack adoration, your touch lacks tenderness and your lips lack love.

Therefore, over the years, I have accepted that I will never be more than a responsibility to you…

Yet, here I am.

Still craving you.

The loss of our child has me lonely, my dear.

I just want one thing.

Is it too much to ask?

I just want my husband.

- A

“Hey there, my love. Did you miss me?” I whispered to Ragna, running my fingers through her wild mane. “I haven’t seen you in three days. God, why does it feel longer?”

She let out a snort in response, bumping her head into my shoulder. “Yes, I miss you too. Has Cerberus been nice to you while I was gone?”

After my seizure the day of the shooting, my body needed time to recuperate. I was sleepy and sluggish most of the time, feeling somewhat out of sorts. My muscles were still sore and I still felt like I had been flung into a wall several times and then stomped on.

The shooting and the suicide of the maid was still a mystery to me. My body trembled at the thought, so I quickly quashed the memory down. That was exactly what I had been doing for the last three days. Every time I thought of Killian running over to me, shielding me with his body, the sound of the gun going off… and then his blood staining his white shirt and my hand – it triggered me.

So, I chose to trust Killian when he said that he had doubled the security on the island and that he was digging deeper into the matter.

“Do you want to go for a gallop?” I asked my mare. I rubbed a hand down her side, feeling how powerful she was. “I miss riding you.”

Our eyes locked and we seemed to have an understanding. My sweet girl had missed me too. I grabbed her by the bridle and led her away from her stall. She chewed on some hay while I prepared my saddle.

The sound of footsteps approaching made me pause and I looked over Ragna’s shoulder to find Killian walking into the stable.

Without as much of a single word, I looked away and ignored his presence. We barely said a word to each other since the night in my room. We had dinner in silence and once our plates were cleared away, we’d leave the table without as much of glance at each other. I saw him with Samuel a few times, walking down the corridor, deep in conversation and every time, I went in the other direction. The distance between us had grown far wider than before.

Perhaps it was better this way…

“Say goodbye to your mare, Beasty,” Killian drawled, his tone frosty.

My head snapped in his direction, pausing while I had been trying to strap the saddle on Ragna. “Excuse me?”

I had been so surprised he was speaking to me that his words didn’t even register to my brain and when they did, I felt myself grow cold.

His head cocked to the side and his gaze ran down the length of me, taking in the riding clothes that molded to my body from my chest to my hips and shapely legs. “Come tomorrow, she won’t be here anymore,” he elaborated with a deadly calmness.

I should have known. I should have been prepared.

When Killian was this cool and collected, nothing good came out of it.

I had come to prefer his rage over his calm.

My heart stammered. “What are you talking about, Killian?”

“I sold her. To the highest bidder. She’s currently worth 250,000 dollars.”

My hand froze in mid-air, as I was about to give Ragna a pat. “What did you just say?” My tone was deceptively soft, but I was feeling anything but. My mind ran with all kind of thoughts and the ground swayed under my feet.

“Am I going to have to repeat everything I say?” His lips tugged to the side, but his expression lacked the warmth of any humane emotions. “I said, I sold her. Say goodbye, Julianna.”

I shook my head, madly, and my hair flew in my face. Even though it was a pretty warm day today, coldness seeped through my bones. “Ragna is not going anywhere,” I said fiercely. “She’s mine. Your father gifted her to me.”

The only difference in his calm and collected posture was his nostrils flaring. “Oh, really? Well, that’s too bad. The sale is final.”

“You can’t!”

“I can and I just did.” Killian spoke with such finality that it hurt to hear. “Say goodbye. It’s your last chance, Beasty. I won’t be so nice about it again.”

“No,” I choked, wrapping my arm around Ragna’s neck. “You can’t. Please.”

Ragna let out an alarmed neigh, and I could feel her grow agitated. As if she was in tune with my emotions. As if she understood what was happening. My mare stomped forward, putting herself between Killian and I.

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