I faced him, fury bristling under my skin. “If you’re going to say sorry again, Cam, I’ll scream so loud everyone in this damn hospital will hear. Because sorry won’t cut it. It won’t erase how much you broke me. My face is still swollen from crying all night, and you know it. You’re secretly laughing, seeing me like this, aren’t you? Because you have it all now. You haveher. And you’rehappy, just like you said.”
“Fuck, Sloane, I’m not trying to—”
I cut him off quickly, needing to get away before I exploded. “Your five minutes are up. Catch you in rounds, Dr. Davis.”
I yanked the door open with force and stormed out, leaving him there.
In the evening, I took an Uber again, heading to my mother-in-law’s to pick up Harper. Cameron had another surgery, so he’d be tied up for a while.
Good.
But on the way, I kept wondering how I’d explain to Anita why I wasn’t with Cameron. I always waited for him, and together we’d pick up Harper from her house.
Should I tell her we’re separated? She didn’t even know he’d moved out. We were always the ones going to her, rarely the other way around, so she never knew.
Would I lose Anita, too?
The thought gnawed at me. I loved her. She was more of a mother to me than my own. I decided to focus on that. On Anita. I tried to come up with something to say, something that would keep our relationship from changing. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing her, too.
But no matter how hard I tried, my thoughts kept drifting back to Cameron. I knew I was only distracting myself by thinking about anything else.
Because if I didn’t, those questions would take over my mind.
Would he be with her tonight?
Would he whisper those same seductive words in her ear, the way he used to with me?
Would he touch her, make love to her, while I lay alone in our bed, surrounded by memories?
Would he think about me at all?
I rubbed my face with both hands and cursed under my breath.
How was I supposed to go on from this?
From him?
From the life we built and the pieces he so carelessly left behind?
The truth was, I didn’t know if I could.
Because I loved him.
Goddamn it, I still loved him.
When did it all go wrong? I kept trying to figure that out. To trace back all the wrong turns we took that led us to this point. Cameron’s love for me used to be so strong that anyone who knew us wouldn’t believe what we’ve become. That he could cheat on me. That he could choose someone else over me.
And decide to end our marriage along with it.
By the time I arrived at Anita’s, I was so exhausted I could barely lift my feet to the door. She opened it and said, “Harper just fell asleep. I took her to her room. Maybe we should wait a little while before waking her.”
I nodded as I took off my shoes and coat, then drifted toward the room. When I opened the door, the sight of my five-year-old daughter greeted me. I walked closer, unable to stop the smile that tugged at my lips. She had dark hair like Cameron and me, a little wavy just like her dad’s. Her cheeks were rosy, her lips soft and pouty, her thick lashes fluttering slightly in sleep. So lovely.
And it looked tempting, lying there beside her.
So I did.
I lay down next to her and took her tiny hand, resting it gently against my cheek. I closed my eyes, and sleep took me instantly.
