I reached for his wrist and held it tightly. “You can. We’ll get through this together. He’s been hard on me, too.”
“But he’s never hit you,” Xander said, his voice flat with resignation.
“Maybe because I’m a girl,” I answered. “But that doesn’t mean he didn’t lash out.”
Father never laid a hand on me, but his words hit just as hard.
Xander shook his head slowly. “I’m tired, Sloane. This is never going to end. I can’t picture living like this for years. What about college? What if I don’t get into med school? What if I can’t be a surgeon like him? What if I’m just not good enough?”
“Then we’ll try our best,” I said gently. “You and I, we’ll get through it together.”
He looked at me, eyes hollow. “I need to get out of here, Sloane.”
A chill ran through me. My grip on his wrist tightened.
“You can’t leave me, Xander. I can’t do this alone.”
He stayed quiet, eyes fixed on his clasped hands.
“If you go,” I said shakily, “take me with you.” I meant it. I wasn’t going to be left behind in this.
He looked at me then. “You need to finish high school first.”
“That’s a year away, Xan,” I said, a shiver crawling down my spine at the thought. “It’s too long.”
Xander shook his head. “But this isn’t living, Sloane. I can’t keep doing this. I can’t take the beatings anymore. Or the way he talks to me like I’m worthless. Like I’m fucking stupid.” His voice cracked. “I’m tired. I need to get out.”
“Xander...” I whispered, trying to catch his eyes, but he wouldn’t look at me. “You’re scaring me.”
He let out another sigh, a long, weary one. “Go back to your room, Sloane. If you stay too long, he’ll get suspicious. Just go study.”
I knew he was right, but I couldn’t move. I was afraid to leave him.
He saw my hesitation and gave me a small, fractured smile.
“You know I love you, right?”
I nodded quickly, eyes burning. “I love you too.”
We never said it out loud.
We were raised to keep our feelings tucked away, taught that showing them was a sign of weakness. That had been true for as long as I could remember.
But I loved my brother. And he loved me. We knew it without saying a word, carried it in silence, in the way we showed up for each other again and again.
And this time, he said it.
For the first time.
He said it.
We both said it.
At that time, I didn’t know if that was a good thing... or a terrible one.
“I’m so grateful to have a sister like you,” he said quietly. “But you’re meant for something better, Sloane. You have a future without me holding you back.”
I shook my head hard. “No. You never dragged me down. You’re the one who’s kept me standing, Xander. I can’t do this without you, and all this sudden soft talk is seriously freaking me out.”
