I’d just have to get through this deal and then take a couple of days off to catch my breath. Like every other demanding deal I’d worked on in the last six years.
I pulled on a pair of black jeans, a T-shirt, and a blazer, and then I piled my wet hair on top of my head, securing it with a hair tie before walking out the door.
No one in the office would be able to tell if the puffiness under my eyes was caused by tears or exhaustion, anyway.
On our daily 10:00 a.m. call with the Brower team, Jasmine said, “The other side said they’ll send us the purchase agreement and related documents back by 9:00 p.m. tonight. Can you guys review it, propose revisions, and send us updated versions by 7:00 a.m., and then we can talk about it at 8:00 a.m.?” Her tone was businesslike, almost casual, like she hadn’t just asked this entire team to pull an all-nighter.
Besides that birthday party, I hadn’t had a night or even a weekend afternoon off in nearly two weeks, and neither had any of my junior associates. For the hundredth time that week I considered telling John that, despite Jasmine’s consistent gratitude and positive feedback, her timing expectations were unreasonable, and the pace of this deal was unsustainable. But I worried he’d think I wasn’t willing to work hard if I said something like that, so I refrained.
John didn’t bother messaging me to ask if we could meet that timing before he nodded and told Jasmine, “Will do.”
I sucked in a breath through my nose and willed myself not to cry right there on the video call. It would take at least five hours to review and revise all the documents, which meant the associates and I would be going into that client call with four hours of sleep, if we were lucky. In her little video square, Claire’s face crumpled momentarily, like she was about to cry, too. When the call ended, I asked her to swing by my office.
“You okay? I know that deadline Jasmine requested is insane.”
“Yes, I’m okay. We’ll get through it.” Her glassy eyes and wobbling lip told me she was lying.
“Please tell me. Do you have something important coming up that you’re worried about?”
Her lip wobbled more. “It’s my anniversary. My husband made us a reservation at this nice place. I know he’ll understand that we need to postpone now. I just feel bad.”
“Go to dinner. The rest of us will handle the documents.”
“But Val, I’m running point on the material contract disclosures. I don’t think Will or Jared will have time to pick that up on top of the parts they’re handling.”
“I’ll do them myself after I finish the purchase agreement. I’m up to speed.” I schooled my face into a smile to reassure her.
“But won’t John?—”
“Don’t worry about John; I won’t mention it to him. He only cares that we get it done by 7:00 a.m. like the client asked.”
She still seemed reluctant, but some light returned to her eyes. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. Please enjoy your anniversary. I feel bad enough that you might fall asleep before dessert, but at least you’ll be there.” The encouraging smile I gave her belied the roaring stress in my gut.
“Thank you so much!”
“Thankyoufor all your hard work. It doesn’t go unnoticed.”
Claire left my office with a tad more spring in her step. Once she was out of sight, I let my mask fall, closing my eyes and dropping my head back on my desk chair.Deep breaths, I told myself. But it was futile.
A few minutes later, I rose from my chair to go to the kitchen and make another cup of coffee.
I wouldn’t be sleeping at all tonight.
Sitting in my office that evening, I’d just decided to do this all-nighter at home when a text came in from Natalie saying she got last-minute tickets to a Broadway show we were both interested in. Technically, I could go and be back at my apartment a little after 9:00p.m. when the contracts were supposed to come in, but I declined.
I was so stressed out that I wouldn’t be focused on the show, and I wouldn’t enjoy it. I used to be able to compartmentalize, but one too many times getting home from dinner to twenty-seven missed emails had robbed me of my ability to put my phone away and enjoy myself.
Warning bells sounded in my head after I messaged Natalie saying I couldn’t make it.It’s bad if I can’t enjoy the things I used to enjoy, right?
Later that night, as I stared at my inbox waiting for the contract to come in, Natalie told me she went to the show by herself.
“The revisions look great,” Jasmine said on our 8:00 a.m. call. “Thank you so much for getting it done so quickly.”
The documents had come in around 10:00 p.m. the night before. John sent me an email with his thoughts on the purchase agreement around 11:00 p.m. and left the rest to us. Will, Jared, and I worked until almost 4:00 a.m. reviewing and revising everything. Then I sent them to bed and finished the material contracts disclosure review for Claire—sending it all to Brower by 7:10 a.m.—before collapsing on top of my comforter in my clothes for half an hour. I remembered at the last second to throw on a different shirt before this video call.
Jasmine told us a handful of things she wanted us to change and then said to go ahead and send it to the counterparty when we were done.
