The words hit like a slap, and I flinch before I can stop myself. I turn to face him fully, squaring my shoulders against the weight of his stare. “I don’t know, Slate. I have a life back in the city, a career I’ve worked for?—”
He doesn’t let me finish. His expression sharpens, the pain flashing in his eyes like a wound reopened. “And I’m supposed to just let you go again? Pretend like this... likewedon’t matter?” His voice drops, rough and strained, like he’s pulling the words out through gritted teeth. “It’s not that simple for me, Emma. It never was.”
Something inside me cracks at the rawness in his voice, the way it trembles with the hurt I put there. I take a step closer, the snow crunching beneath my boots, the weight of his words settling deep in my chest. “I never said it was simple. God, Slate, do you think Iwantto walk away? Do you think I don’t know what I’d be giving up?”
His eyes search mine, as if he’s trying to find the truth beneath my words. I can see the fire burning there, the same fire that always made him so impossible to ignore. He pulls me closer, the space between us shrinking, and I feel the pull of him, the way it tugs at me even when my mind is telling me to be careful. “Then why not stay? Why not give us a chance, instead of running back to a life that doesn’t have room for us?”
The plea in his voice wraps around my heart, squeezing tight. I swallow hard, trying to hold on to the walls I’ve built, but they’re crumbling under the weight of his words, under the force of everything we’ve left unsaid. “Because I’m afraid, Slate.” The confession slips out, raw and unsteady, and I see the way it hits him, the flicker of surprise and pain in his eyes. “Afraid that if I stay, I’ll regret the life I left behind. And I’m scared that if I leave, I’ll regret walking away from this—” I gesture between us, my voice breaking as I force the words out. “From you. Again.”
Slate’s face softens, the anger fading, replaced by something deeper, more exposed. He reaches out, his fingers brushing a stray strand of hair from my face, his touch achingly gentle. “You think you’re the only one scared, Emma? You think I haven’t thought about what happens if you leave again?”
His words hit like a blow, making my breath catch. I meet his gaze, feeling the weight of his pain and the hope he’s trying so hard to hold back. He leans in, his voice dropping to a rough whisper, his thumb tracing the line of my jaw, making me shiver despite the cold. “I’ve spent years convincing myself that I didn’t need anyone, that I was better off keeping people at a distance. But you... you broke through that, and I can’t go back to the way things were. Not now. Not after this.”
My throat tightens, the emotion thickening my voice, but I can’t look away from him, from the raw vulnerability in his eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you again, Slate. I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep.” But even as I say the words, I find myself leaning into his touch, drawn to the warmth of his hand, the way it chases away the chill that’s been lodged in my chest for so long.
Slate shakes his head, his grip on my face tightening, his expression turning fierce, desperate. “It’s not about promises, Emma. It’s about wanting something enough to fight for it, even when it scares the hell out of you.” He brushes his thumb over my bottom lip, the touch so gentle, so intimate, that it sends a sharp pang through my heart. “You want me to let you go? Tell me that. Tell me you don’t want this, and I’ll back off.”
I can see the strain in his face, the way he’s holding himself back, giving me the space to make my choice. It makes the tears burn hotter behind my eyes, and I bite my lip, trying to steady the tremor in my voice. “I don’t want you to let me go,” I admit, the words barely a whisper, but they feel like they’re cutting through the air between us, through the years of pain and longing. I reach up, my hands trembling as I wrap my armsaround him, holding on like he’s the only solid thing in a world that’s spinning too fast. “I don’t want to walk away from this. From us.”
Slate’s breath shudders out, his shoulders sagging as if the weight of the world is finally lifting off them. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me against him, his chin resting on top of my head as he buries his face in my hair. “Then don’t leave,” he murmurs against my ear, his voice rough, vulnerable in a way that makes my chest ache. “Stay, Emma. Stay and let’s figure this out together. Even if it’s messy. Even if we don’t have all the answers.”
I cling to him, feeling the heat of his body seeping into mine, melting away some of the fear that’s kept me locked up for so long. The world around us is so quiet, so still, like it’s waiting for us to take that first step, to decide which path we’ll choose. And for the first time in years, I feel like maybe—just maybe—I’m not afraid to take that step with him.
I press my face against his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart, matching the frantic rhythm of my own. “Okay,” I breathe, the word coming out shaky, but it feels like a promise, one that I’m scared of but ready to try. “Okay, Slate. I’ll stay. For now.”
He pulls back just enough to cup my face, his hands rough but so gentle, like he’s afraid I’ll break if he holds on too tightly. His eyes search mine, tenderness softening the hard lines of his face. There’s something in his expression that I’ve never seen before—something vulnerable, something hopeful. “For now,” he repeats, a wry, almost bittersweet smile curving his lips. “Guess that’ll have to do.”
His smile cracks something open inside me, and for a second, the tension eases, the weight of all our past hurts slipping away in the face of this fragile, new beginning. I manage a shaky smile back, my heart stumbling over itself as he leans in, pressing a kiss to my forehead, the warmth of his lips searing into my skin.
The snow falls softly around us, blanketing the world in silence, but inside, everything feels loud—my heartbeat, his breath, the unspoken promise that hangs between us. We’re not fixed, not by a long shot. But maybe, just maybe, we’re starting to find our way.
And this time, I’m ready to see where it leads.
Chapter Ten
Slate
The sun cuts through the last shreds of the morning mist, turning the snow-covered peaks into a blinding sea of white. My breath fogs in the air as we walk, mingling with the chill that bites through my coat, but I barely notice. All I can see is Emma, standing a few feet away, her hair catching the light like it’s made of fire. Her face is pale against the snow, but there’s a resolve in her eyes, a quiet strength that wasn’t there before. Her words from this morning are weighing on me, anxiety chugging through my body like the blood in my veins.
I’ll stay. For Now.
I know I’m at a crossroads. Either I say what’s buried inside me or I lose her all over again. And the thought of that—of watching her walk away a second time—tears at something deep and raw inside me.
“I don’t know if I can do this, Emma.” The words claw out of my chest, rougher than I mean them to be, but I can’t hold them back. I shift my weight, feeling the crunch of snow beneath my boots, the cold seeping into my skin. “Letting someone in again, trusting that it won’t all fall apart... it scares the hell out of me.”
She just watches me, those green eyes of hers wide, glimmering like she’s trying to see right through me. Her lips part like she’s going to say something, but she holds back, letting the silence stretch between us. And her silence—it’s a weight, pressing down on me, making my chest tight. But I push through it, my fists clenching at my sides.
“You left, and I shut everything out. Told myself I was better off alone. That I didn’t need anyone, especially not you.” I force myself to meet her gaze, to let her see the truth in my eyes, even if it cuts. “But then you came back, and... I don’t know how to be that guy anymore. The one who doesn’t care. The one who doesn’t need.”
Emma takes a step closer, her boots sinking into the snow, leaving small, perfect prints. Her expression softens, and I see her defenses start to crack, just a little. She reaches out, her fingers brushing against my jacket, and her touch is a jolt straight to my system, electric, warm. “You don’t have to be that guy, Slate. Not with me.”
Her words hit me like a punch, and for a second, I don’t know what to say. My throat tightens, and all that frustration, all that longing I’ve held back, comes spilling out. “I want this,” I admit, my voice breaking, rough around the edges. “I want you. I want a future with you. But I’m scared, Emma. Scared that I’ll mess it up, scared that I’ll lose you again, and this time it’ll be for good.”
Her gaze softens even more, and she takes another step, until she’s so close I can feel the heat of her body cutting through the cold, seeping into me. “I get it, Slate. I’m scared too. But I don’t want to spend my life running away from things that might hurt. I don’t want to keep wondering what could have been.”
The words slam into me, breaking open all the barriers I’ve tried to keep in place. My breath hitches, and I see the shine in her eyes, the determination that twists something deep in mychest. She looks at me like she’s finally ready to see what’s right in front of her, and it terrifies me.
But it also makes me hope.
