“I can’t remember,” lies my lying tongue.
His shoulders ease as the tension leaves his body. Though the frown doesn’t totally vacate his face. It lingers in the furrows on his forehead. He peruses my tank, shorts, and sneakers and asks, “You heading out?”
“Going for a walk.”
“Alone at this hour of the night?”
“I like the quiet and I’m kind of nocturnal.”
“Would you mind if I came with you?”
I open my mouth, but it takes a moment for words to form. It’s sweet of him to worry. But I can look after myself. “There’s no need to—”
“It’s just that I’ve been stuck in the kitchen all day.” And he gives me the smile. The one that hits me straight in the heart andbetween the hips. Hana performed a litany of online searches and confirmed he shouldn’t be a danger to me. But she doesn’t know the effect he has on me. This is dangerous. Losing focus and getting punched in the face confirmed as much.
“I have a taser,” I say. “And pepper spray.”
His brows rise. “I promise to mind my manners.”
“No…what I mean is, you don’t have to worry about me.”
He nods. “Okay.”
I wait for him to change his mind or make an excuse and go inside. But none of those things happen. “You still want to come on my walk?”
“I really do.”
“Let’s go then.”
The lake lies to the west of us. I tend to vary my route, but rarely my destination. Walking helps on the nights I need to outpace the past. It reminds me there’s a big, beautiful world out there just waiting to be discovered. A dog barks somewhere and soft music can be heard coming from a house in the distance. Noah says nothing. Just walks beside me with his hands stuffed in his pants pockets. I like how he doesn’t feel the need to make conversation. I used to be chatty, but now I guess I’m more used to silence. He does, however, keep giving me side eyes and a hint of a smile. It seems companionable or friendly. But my heart of course completely overreacts. Walking with Noah just might be the most exciting thing to happen to me in years.
We cover a couple of blocks and pass the brewery, a coffee shop, dispensary, and pizza place. The only other signs of life are a cat dashing across the road and the occasional car driving past. I feel oddly delicate beside his brawn despite my ample ass. And he’s definitely shortened his stride so as not to outpace me. The sleeves of his white work tee are rolled back, showing off his biceps just so. I should probably stop ogling him. That would be good.
We soon clear suburbia and hit the shoreline. The lake is a dark expanse of water beneath a sky full of stars. There are a couple of boats anchored nearby, and a warm breeze is blowing. But otherwise, all of the world is silent and still. Home is for feeling safe and sound. Standing here by the water is for breathing deep and being free.
Noah takes it all in, not talking for a while. Then he clears his throat and says, “This doesn’t suck.”
“No,” I agree. “It doesn’t.”
“Choosing Vermont as the place to slow down and stress less is working well. And you’ve lived here your whole life?”
“I grew up on the other side of the city, but…yeah.”
He waits for me to continue.
“My, um, grandmother raised me. Then, after she passed, the house was too big for just me. And I was ready for a change of scenery, so I moved to South End.”
“No siblings?”
“No,” I say. “What about you?”
“Born and raised in Sacramento. My parents and younger sister still live there. She’s married to a great girl with a baby on the way.”
“You’re going to be an uncle. Nice.”
He smiles and tips his head back to stare at the sky. “I used to love stargazing when I was a kid. Too much light pollution in L.A. This is a little better, though.”
“Which is your favorite constellation?”
