There’s a chill in the air, the first one of the season. I’ve been up since four with Landis, making sure everything is ready for the final harvest. The sky overhead is spotless blue. The fields wave in a warm wind that promises to turn hot by late afternoon. I’m on a horse, standing at the edge of the front fenceline of the western pasture, Landis loitering beside me, astride his gelding.
“Better get in and get breakfast,” I say.
He nods, eyes lowered. There’s something about the threat of winter every year that gets him quiet.
“You good?” I ask, shifting my weight to turn my horse.
He jerks his head. His jaw is set, curly dark hair wet with sweat already. Once again, I’m struck by how little he looks like me. His mannerisms are mine. He was always my shadow growingup, imitating me down to the way I stand and the cadence of my speech. But now that he’s a man, I see so much more in everything he does. They all lead back to the empty space, the questions that can’t be answered by me or his mother.
“Is this what you wanted?” he says abruptly.
“Huh?”
He gestures at the pastures, the house. “You wanted to be a rancher out west?”
He’s not talking about career choices. He’s talking about the past. I stack my hands on the saddlehorn. “Yeah, I did. It was a fuckload better than being what I was.”
“But you got to choose,” he says, voice careful.
“Don’t make your life harder than it needs to be,” I say.
His mouth thins. I squeeze my horse's sides, and he starts moving toward the house. I can hear Landis behind me, following at a distance. Things have changed a little between him and I the last few years. Not for the worse, just different. He’s a lot quieter, and I can tell his heart’s not in his work the way it used to be. I should take him out, sit at the bar, and let him talk, but God, I am terrified at the thought of him leaving.
We put the horses away without speaking. Landis comes to the main house, going ahead to the kitchen. I hear him talking to Della while I put my things away, and I give them space. Maybe I should take Della out first and talk about this with her. When we discussed it the last time, I honestly thought that was the end of it.
I enter the kitchen to find Julie-Mae and Gage at the table. She still works at the county clerk’s office, and he comes by every morning he’s able to drive her into work. It turns out, Della’s instinct with Gage was right—he’s a solid guy, and he’s got more Freya in him than I thought. It evens out all the Deacon.
“Julie-Mae’s gonna have a late day,” Della says, hand on my side. “Apparently, the clerk’s office got wrecked by fireworks.”
“Excuse me?” I turn on her.
“Accident,” she says. “Hyde, the guy who owns the pawn shop, rode in with a bunch of fireworks and tried to show the sheriff they were duds. He wanted to sue the guy who sold them, but they weren’t duds.”
“Was anybody in there?”
She shakes her head. “The sheriff grabbed Hyde by the back of the neck and yanked him out. Shut the door up tight, but the whole front room is wrecked.”
“Jesus,” I say. “Some people.”
“Bless his heart, Hyde just can’t catch a break,” says Della. “But he does try, and that’s what’s important.”
“Well, they don’t give out awards for trying,” I say. “But they do hand out jail time for failing.”
Della rolls her eyes, crossing the room to turn the stove off. She’s in a blouse and jeans this morning, and they hug her ass perfectly, which leads me to believe she’s probably going to ask me for something. That’s alright. It’s a small price to pay. I go up behind her, leaning in like I’m looking at what she’s cooking.
“Nice ass, baby,” I whisper.
“You hush,” she says, lips barely moving. “After breakfast, I want you to take me to Knifely.”
“The home goods store?”
“Yep, that’s the one.”
“You renovating something again?”
She turns, looking up at me. Her blouse is one of those thin little cotton things that ties over her breasts, showing a hint of cleavage. Della is pretty lean, but she’s got curves, and I eat up the sight like I haven’t been laid in weeks. I, in fact, got laid last night, but I can’t help it if I have the prettiest wife in the whole damn world.
“I’m still working on Delia’s old room.”
