And then I feel stupid. I’m the reason he went out with Cassie. I made him go out with her. It was some point between Cassie and Tom that I realized I needed Luke in a way that was more than just friends.
“Wait.” I’m re-sorting everything in my head, trying to view things as if Luke had liked me as more than just a friend the entire time. “The text was real?” Though I think I know the answer, I’m afraid to hear it confirmed, just in case I’m wrong.
“Yes,” he says finally.
There’s breathless relief, releasing tension that I didn’trealize I’ve been holding.
“I didn’t think you felt the same way, so I said it was a joke because the last thing I wanted to do was to lose you,” he says. “Even if we’d only ever be friends, I wanted you in my life.”
I bring my hands up to my face, running them down my cheeks. I start laughing into my hands because the emotion that breaks free is so dramatic, I feel giddy.
I feel Luke’s hand tug on mine, pulling them away so he can see my face. “Just to be clear, this is a good reaction, right?”
I start laughing harder now, just because his response is so... Luke. And I love him for that. Because that’s what all this is, isn’t it? It’s not just a protective sense of someone I’ve known my entire life. It’s love, a feeling we’ve created for each other because we’ve so effectively wrapped ourselves around each other as we’ve grown up, never knowing that one day, it would be more.
“Yes.” I nod.
His smile widens, and it takes everything in me not to throw myself at him. Luke must have the same thought as me, but he doesn’t resist it like I do. He closes the distance between us, moving the blankets out of the way and pulling himself forward until he’s leaning over me.
Twenty-two years together, and it’s like I’ve been holding my breath the entire time. He closes the distance between us, his lips touching mine, eager and so blissfully soft.
His hand cups my cheek and then wraps his fingers in my hair, pulling me closer. I fall into him, one hand resting against his chest while the other curls around his neck, skimming the hair sticking out from under his hat. The motion is so familiar,yet so shockingly different.
Kissing Luke should be awkward and new, but it feels familiar, like home.
Too soon, Luke pulls away, his face still inches from mine, smiling at me like he’s trying to memorize my face the same way I’m trying to learn his in this moment. He’s not Luke, the boy I’ve grown up with. He’s Luke, the guy I could spend the rest of my life with.
“I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time,” he says, brushing his thumb over my cheek.
I’m absolutely giddy, feeling his skin brush over mine. But in the darkness, I notice a bright strip of green in the sky.
“Luke!” I almost squeal.
He almost jumps off me in surprise, but when I point to the sky, his face shifts from shock to mirror the same delight that’s on my face.
I push away the blankets and jump out of the car.
The aurora borealis is above our heads. The thick, green stripe of color soaks across the sky, moving so slowly it’s hard to catch unless you stare at it long enough.
Luke’s still sitting in the car, staring at the sky, so I grasp his hand and pull him out to stand beside me. The air is freezing, especially without the piles of blankets on us.
Once Luke is standing, he doesn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around me, pulling me to his chest. I follow suit, wrapping my arms around him and resting my head against his chest. The way the two of us wrap around each other feels like the most natural place to be, and I wonder how I’ve gone my entire life without this type of closeness with Luke.
I keep my chin pointed to the sky, watching the green strips move slowly across the expanse. Luke shifts, kissing the top of my head before resting his chin on the hat I’m wearing, his arms wrapping tighter around me.
I shift my face into his chest, the smell of him so familiar and safe that if I closed my eyes, I’d assume I was in the living room of his parents’ house, playing like we used to every Friday night.
“Luke?” I ask. He loosens his grip just enough to look at me. I almost get distracted by his proximity, seeing his face so close, so familiar, but also new. I’d never seen this gaze of adoration painted across his features. I unwrap my arm from around his back and reach out to touch his face, moving slowly, trying to soak it all in. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see the faint glow of the northern lights, but I don’t let my eyes stray from his. That is, until my lips meet his.
I can feel him smile as I kiss him. I kiss him deeply, like I can translate exactly how I feel in this moment. His grip is tight around me, like he’s afraid that if he lets go, I’ll run off. The winds picks up, nipping at our skin, making us hold onto each other tighter. When I finally pull away, I keep my eyes on him.
“I’m sorry it took me so long to figure this all out,” I tell him.
He shakes his head like it doesn’t matter. “I’m just happy to be here now.”
There’s a broad smile on my face as I nestle back against his chest, feeling like I could live in his arms forever. I’m not sure how long we stand there, snuggled into each other for warmth.
Eventually the bright stripes of green begin to disperse, growing wider, taking up more of the sky. They stretch andmorph, the light getting dimmer as time goes on, until it’s hard to make them out any longer. Even then, we stand and watch the stars speckle the sky.
