I felt his hands still in my hair. “Is that what you think it was?” His voice was hard and cold. I didn’t know what I’d done wrong. I’d only meant it as a joke.
“Well, what would you call it?” I asked him.Surely, he wasn’t serious.
“I didn’t… I wasn’t…” A sharp exhale came out of his mouth. “That wasn’t my intention, Eva. I just wanted to keep you safe, and I didn’t have any other choice. Obviously, it backfired on me, but…” He was rambling, words tumbling over themselves as he tried to explain himself.
“Matthew, I’m here with you now and honestly… there is nowhere else that I’d rather be.” My hands fell to my lap as I fidgeted with them nervously. “I didn’t mean to offend you, I thought it would make you laugh.” Shit, had I messed things up already? Was I really that bad at this whole flirting aspect? Granted, I had little experience in this matter. I’d been courted, but I never had to try like I did now, and I felt utterly ridiculous questioning every move I made.
His hand snaked around, and he grabbed my chin, tilting my head around so that our eyes met. “I don’t know what I’m doing, Eva. I don’t know what to say.”
With his head leaned down, he was much closer than I expected him to be. My eyes darted to his lips, then back to his eyes. I could see a pain in them I wanted to take away.
Fuck it.
“Kiss me,” I whispered against his skin. “Kiss me, Matthew.”
He hesitated only for a moment before our lips collided. It was the same feeling as last night, a thousand fires burning brightly across my body. He had one hand on my face and the other snaked through my hair. He groaned as I bit his lip, letting him know just how much I fucking wanted him.
He pulled away and planted a soft kiss on my lips. “I don’t think this is classified as washing your hair,” he said, smiling.
I loved it when he smiled.
“Then I suppose you better take your job seriously,” I swatted his hand playfully, but intertwined my fingers with his and kissed his hand. “I can’t thank you enough for everything.”
He held up a hand to stop me. “Eva, I did nothing.”
“Yes, you did. You may not know it, but you did.” He wouldn’t be able to convince me otherwise. My soul was reforming itself inside of me, slowly stitching up the pieces that had been ripped to shreds by all the bullshit of the past.
My life hadn’t been hard. I’d go as far to say that it was easy compared to others, but I didn’t realize how much I was drowning and how utterly unhappy I was. I was barely holding on to my sanity, and it felt like he had given me the key to my freedom.
He groaned and ran his fingers through his hair. “Stop, please. I’m not the good guy that you think I am. I did nothing –”
“Yes, you did,” I laughed, but when I looked at him, I saw he wasn’t laughing with me. This was something that he obviously took extremely personal. Once again, I felt like I had completely screwed things up.
“No, Eva. I’ve condemned you. Don’t you see it?” He stood up and backed away from me. There was so much raw emotion etched into his beautiful face. It hurt my soul. “I may have tried to keep you safe, but all it’s done is make things worse. I should have stayed away. I shouldn’t have ever come near you.”
I stood up, grabbing the blanket and made my way over to him. He leaned his back on the far wall, looking like an angel that fell from the heavens above. “Matthew, it’s okay.”
He looked up at me in misery. “You don’t know what I’ve done…”
I shook my head. “It wouldn’t matter to me. All that matters is the here and now.” I reached my hand out for his. I didn’t know if he’d let me take it, but he did. I traced my fingers over his skin to soothe him, but he grabbed my wrist and pulled my body to his.
“Gods, Eva… I just can’t stay away from you.” He kissed me. Hard.
He was throwing every fear and insecurity into our kiss, grabbing at anything to keep himself above water.
One of his hands intertwined in my hair and the other planted on my back, pushing my body into his. I couldn’t get any closer to him if I had wanted to, and Ididwant to. I needed to feel every inch of his body on mine. In fact, I had never wanted anyone more.
I clutched at his shirt as he held me. He moved the hand that was placed behind my back away from my body. I whimpered as I thought he was going to push me away, but he just smiled like the devil as he brought his hand behind his head to pull his shirt off in one swift move.
I clawed at his naked torso, feeling every divot and muscle beneath my hands. His lips traced under my ear to my neck to my shoulder, sending shivers of pleasure through my body.
Fuck. I needed him.
He reached for the blanket that was secured around my body, but stopped before unleashing it, waiting for me to give him permission to go further. I nodded my head and clasped my hands around his neck to bring his mouth closer to mine. He groaned into my lips, pushing his hard length up against my thigh.
“Fuck, Eva,” he breathed. The blanket fell and pooled around my feet as he stared down at my body. The way he was looking at me made me blush, like I was his own personal feast laid out before him. Wetness pooled between my legs at the lust in his gaze.
He turned me around so that my back was against his torso. His hands roamed my body and kneaded my breasts slowly, making me ache for his rough touch. His lips pushed against my neck as his fingers tweaked my nipples, and I let out a breathy moan. One hand splayed down my stomach, so close to the apex between my thighs, teasing me by tracing circles on my skin.
