It was a dark period for many Fae in the realm, but particularly for me. I had left my family before Lachlan had fully risen to power because I saw what he had become, what he was trying to turn me into as his heir. I ran away in the middle of the night and kept to the woods for days before I grew so weak that I stumbled upon a battle encampment. That was where I met Kalen, the first soul who didn’t know my past and didn’t judge me. We were fast friends, although he had always been a pain in my ass.
I chuckled, earning a strange look from Eva. She was no doubt wondering what was going on in my head. I shook my head. “Just thinking about old times,” I told her.
She smiled, making my heart stop in my chest.Gods, she was beautiful. “Anything you’d be willing to share with me?”
We sent the raven off with our message, and I hoped and prayed that it would find him. I sat down, leaning my back against the trunk of a tree as I beckoned her to come closer. She sat down between my legs, laying against my chest. I hoped she couldn’t feel the constant thrumming in my chest as I wrapped her in her my arms. I leaned down and kissed her cheek, earning a small blush that crept across her cheeks.
I told her stories about Kalen and me getting into our usual trouble on the battlefield and off it. How we had joined up with her father in battle. She smiled as I told her how brave he was. I wasn’t lying. He was truly one of the most brilliant warriors I’d seen in battle, especially given the fact that he was a king. It wasn’t uncommon for kings to sit in their palaces while their armies did their dirty work. But her father had just lost his queen, his wife, the mother of his children, and his mate. He would not take that insult without a fight.
I choked at the thought of losing Eva, and I barely knew her. Her father and mother had been together for gods only knew how long. I couldn’t imagine the connection they had, and I wondered if we would have that.
There was a tightness in my throat. Having that with Eva would be near impossible. She was Helia’s heir. She couldn’t marry me. Especially not if Damien or Orion had their way. No doubt they would have told her father about me, or worse, who I was. They would kill me in front of a crowd, regardless of if Eva spoke on my behalf. Her people wouldn’t accept me ruling by her side.
I should leave her. But where would she go? Going back to Helia would be dangerous with Orion there, especially since she knew his secret. That spineless bastard had been twisted into my father’s ranks from the beginning. He was a disgusting worm. He’d even had his own wife killed, claiming that The Horde had infiltrated the city, but he was the one that opened the fucking gates for them. Told them when and where to attack, choosing a time when a portion of the army would be put through military exercises and therefore could not strike back. Oh, his performance was worthy of an award though, and it temporarily weakened Helia’s borders since they were reeling from the massive attack and loss of life. Grief would do that to you–whether it was anger or sadness, your emotions were clouded, and you couldn’t react properly.
No, I couldn’t leave her. Not yet at least. If I couldn’t be with her long-term, then it was my duty to ensure that she was safe. I’d make sure that happened if it was the last thing I did.
33
EVA
We stayed on the Isle of Síocháin for another day before we received instructions from Kalen on where to meet him. He was back along the borders of Angoria, keeping an eye on the unrest that seemed to grow.
The blight that plagued the lands was getting worse, and people were getting desperate. While Trystan hadn’t made his presence known yet, The Horde was a genuine threat and out in the open. Not only were attacks growing, but they were getting bolder, claiming ownership of them in the name of Lachlan. Kingdoms were struggling to keep the peace within their boundaries, which led to uprisings. Some groups even called for the end of the king’s reigns. It was complete anarchy, and I was powerless now to stop it.
Matthew had seemed drawn into himself since last night. Perhaps it was talking about the past that made him ponder his future. I had been thinking about my own if I was honest with myself.
I didn’t know where to go from here. I needed to oust Orion, but I couldn’t waltz back through the palace doors. Orion had the public and the council on his side, not to mention my father. He was a godsdamn war hero. He had killed Lachlan, supposedly, and the entire fucking realm thought they owed him their fealty. Plus, I had to consider Damien. Orion was his father. He wouldn’t be inclined to believe me, even if I could prove it, which I couldn’t. It was mine and Matthew’s word against Orion’s, and that wouldn’t amount for much.
I knew that Orion would have crawled back to my father, but what web of lies would he have spun this time? Regardless, it would point to Matthew negatively. It would have been his entire master plan to somehow fake a mating bond and spin a fantasy that would fit his agenda.
That wasn’t what happened, was it? Or was I still a pawn in a game that was bigger than myself? Matthew had admitted to me before that my role in the war would be up to me. Did he intend to turn me against my kingdom? My stomach churned at the thought.
I looked at him as he laid next to me, breathing peacefully. He was beautiful, the moonlight dancing along the planes of his body. Without thinking, I grabbed the knife that was next to my satchel and straddled him, pressing the blade into his throat.
He blinked up at me in surprise, but I kept the blade where it was. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he growled.
What was I doing?I didn’t know what had come over me, but I wouldn’t be taken for a fool. Right now, that’s how I felt. My life was falling apart around me: mates, traitors, and lies. It’s funny how far insecurity will push a person.
I applied more pressure on his throat and watched as he swallowed in fear. Only a moment of weakness rested on his features. “Am I just a game to you?”
“What?” His tone was sharp.Just like the blade, I thought.
“Are you playing me? Do you intend to help your brother by using me?”
He grabbed my hips and flipped me over so his body was resting above me, my knife staying where it was. I noticed it had broken the skin and drawn blood to the surface, but I didn’t care.
“If I said yes, would you finally believe me to be the villain I told you I was?” He laughed in my face. For a moment, I was terrified of what he could do to me. He looked the part I was accusing him of being. He was darkness personified. Maybe that’s why I was drawn to him. My mate. His power called to mine in a way I’d never experienced. It was potent. Deadly. Just like him. I pushed the blade tighter against his throat. This time, drawing more blood than I intended. He didn’t flinch. In fact, he remained deathly still.
“I don’t know what to think anymore,” I whispered, a tear leaking from the corner of my eye. I didn’t recognize myself, or the fear that I felt.
Matthew bent down slowly, my knife staying against his throat but moving with his body instead of against it. His lips caressed mine softly, before dragging up and kissing away the tear.
“I’ll make you a promise, right here and now,” he said, keeping his eyes trained on mine. “If I betray you, I’ll allow you to pierce my heart with this blade yourself.”
I dropped the knife and crashed my lips to his. He kissed me hungrily, devouring my lips. I jerked his head back so I could look at the cut on his neck. He smirked as I ran my thumb over it gently.
“What a delightfully violent woman you are, Eva,” he murmured. His eyes trailed down my body. “Such a surprise.”
