Stepping out of the darkness, I placed my hand on the ladder and looked up. “Hey, bluebird. Mind if I come up?”
She narrowed her eyes. “Do I have a choice?”
“You always have a choice, Cleo.” I took a deep breath. “I just hope you choose me.”
For a moment, she didn’t speak. I wondered if she was going to tell me to kick rocks, but something in her expression softened just a touch. “If you can make it up here without having a panic attack, I guess I’ll let you stay.”
“You’ve got yourself a deal,” I said, beginning my ascent. Honestly, I was surprised this thing could hold my weight. I’d been worried about that as a kid, and I’d been nothing but a tall, lanky thing back then. I’d gained a significant amount of muscle over the years, and suddenly, every creak and moan felt more significant.
When I finally made it to the top, I let out a shaky breath. I wasn’t sure I felt better about being off the ladder and in the treehouse, but at least if I was going to fall through the floor, Cleo would be the last thing I saw. That counted for something, right?
I sat next to her, waiting for the moment she’d tell me she’d changed her mind, to go away, but she never did. I stretched outmy legs and looked around. So much was different, but it was familiar, too. It felt a little outdated and rundown, which is how I sometimes felt too. Time had that effect on everything, it seemed.
“What’re you doing here?” Cleo asked, finally breaking the silence.
“I’m here to see you.”
“I know,” she said dryly. “But why? Why did you come out here tonight? What were you hoping for?”
“We kissed six days ago, and then you ran away. When you didn’t show up to Charlie’s riding lessons, I was worried about you, Cleo. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Lennox told me to back off, but I clearly didn’t listen.”
“Surprising for that traitor,” she muttered. “Especially bringing you over here to goad me into conversations I’m not ready to have.”
“For what it’s worth, I didn’t really hear anything.” She looked skeptical, and I chuckled. “I mean, it wasn’t for a lack of trying.”
This time, she smiled. It was small, but it was there. Suddenly, I felt sixteen again—watching her step into the room with that same cautious joy. I’d take it as a win. “That’s good, at least.”
I snapped my fingers. “There was one question, though, that I caught the end of. I was hoping maybe you could repeat your answer for clarity’s sake. Something about love? I don’t know. My hearing is shit these days. I blame it on the years of loud music.”
Cleo stared at me for a moment before looking away, her mouth set in a hard line. “You want to know what I said when Lennox asked if I loved you.” Her voice was deceptively calm, but her hands were shaking. She glanced down, squeezing them together to gain control.
“I do,” I said. Any humor I had moments ago was gone. Ididn’t want to hide behind it anymore. If there was ever a moment to lay all my cards on the table, it was now. It was here, in our spot. “I need to know.”
She tipped her head back with a low groan. “Grady, you’ve been back in my life for less than two weeks after being out of it for seventeen years. How the hell am I supposed to answer that question when I don’t even know how I feel about it fully?”
“Easy,” I said, shrugging. “Ask me if I love you.”
“What?”
“Ask me if I love you. It only seems fair for me to dish out what I’m asking you to. So do it. Ask me, bluebird.”
Cleo’s lip trembled as she turned her gaze toward me. “Do you love me?—”
“Yes,” I responded. I didn’t even let her finish, because I didn’t need to think about it.
“Grady—”
“The answer is yes, I love you. I love you now like I loved you then. Maybe more, if I’m honest. Back then, I was a coward who wasn’t prepared to fight for you. I let the best thing I ever had walk away from me. But I’m not the same stupid kid I was then, bluebird. I’m a man who knows what he wants and is willing to do anything to get it.”
It was terrifying laying my heart on the line like that. If Cleo wanted to, she could crush it beneath her pretty little foot without a second thought. I wouldn’t blame her if she did. I probably deserved it. Still, it was a risk I had to take. She needed to know how much she meant to me, if she didn’t already.
“You know, I’ve spent my life analyzing our relationship. I mean, we were only together for a few years. It was high school love. We should’ve been over it by now.”
“Is this your way of telling me you’re over it?”
“No. That’s the problem.” I tried to pretend I didn’t notice the way she trembled, trying my hardest not to take her in my arms, rather than let her collect her thoughts. “Did you everstop and think the issue wasn’t that we didn’t love one another, but maybe we were just too young for that kind of commitment?” Her voice was barely above a whisper as we sat side-by-side. The cicadas sang their summer song, keeping the silence from swallowing us whole.
“What do you mean?” I asked, rolling my head against the worn wood of the treehouse. I wasn’t going to risk missing a moment of the vulnerability she was willing to show.
