‘I was not lapping it up!’
Maybe he had a point. In truth, he’d just stood there, looking like his mind was somewhere else entirely. But my point was that he hadn’t made any effort to disentangle himself from her.
I said nothing, even though all the words were bubbling and racing in my head.Just tell him to leave, Lottie. You’ve made your decision. Stick to it this time.
For a moment, we just stood there, staring at each other, each trying to decide the next move.
‘Would you like a drink?’ Good manners elbowed their way to the fore.
Inner me slapped a hand to her forehead.
‘I don’t want to put you out.’
God, I hated this formality. Why did things have to get complicated?Because you opened your heart to him, Lottie, that’s why, I snapped back at myself.
‘You’re not. I’m making tea. Have one or don’t. It’s all the same to me.’ I tried to sound nonchalant, but even I knew I hadn’t pulled that one off.
‘Lottie, you deserve an explanation.’
I walked towards the kitchen, leaving him to follow if he wanted, which apparently he did.
‘I don’t know what you mean.’ I glanced at him and, by the look on his face, he was fully expecting my nose to grow. Just as I was.
‘I’m pretty sure you do. Like I said before, you’re a terrible liar.’
‘And yet you seem to be a pretty damn good one,’ I said, throwing a teabag into the pot with such force, I was surprised it didn’t bounce straight back out again.
‘I never lied to you.’
‘And there you go again!’ I snapped, splashing hot water into the pot.
‘Maybe you should do that when you’re a little less angry.’ Seb’s brow rippled with concern. ‘You’re going to burn yourself if you’re not careful.’
I slammed the kettle down. ‘You do not get to tell me what I should and shouldn’t do.’
‘I wasn’t trying to. It was just a suggestion to try and keep you safe.’
‘Well, I don’t need any of your suggestions either. I’m quite capable of looking after myself, thanks very much.’
He dragged a hand across his face. ‘I didn’t mean to imply you weren’t. I just don’t want to see you hurt.’
‘It’s a bit bloody late for that then, isn’t it, Seb? Maybe you should have thought about that before you decided to pretend I actually meant something to you.’
He threw his hands up. ‘You do mean something to me!’
I held up a hand. ‘Don’t. I’m not into the few dates, quick shag and see you later kind of relationship, Seb, and you knew that. It might be old-fashioned, but that’s me. I spent years in a relationship that went nowhere and, for all I know, I might have wasted my best chance at having a family. But I knew you were a threat because I liked you. I mean, really liked you and then, for a few stupid hours, you made me believe that you felt the same. But, of course, you didn’t. You never let women in, properly. You play with them, and that might work for some, but it doesn’t for me, and if you’d known me at all, you’d have known that. So, doing what you did is something I’d have not thought you capable of before. I guess I was mistaken.’
‘I don’t play with anyone!’ he replied, his voice calm but anger flashing in his eyes, ‘And I resent that accusation. I’ve never used anyone, and I never would.’
I gave him a look.
‘I wouldn’t. And, to quote you, if you knew me at all, you would also know that.’
I did. Deep down, I knew that. Whatever I thought of Seb, I knew respect for others was something he held as a non-negotiable aspect of his personality.
I turned away.
‘Lottie.’
