All the Caselli siblings never healed. They moved forward and pushed shit in the back of their heads.
It was easier that way.
Safer.
Nobody was coming to save them.
“There’s nothing broken about you, Boobie… look at me,” I demanded, as I sat on the bed, and pulled her closer onto me.
She sobbed harder. “Ye…yeah, the…there is.”
I used both of my hands to wipe her face while holding her face in my hands. “Stop saying that shit. Don’t speak that over your life because it’s not true. Circumstances in your life made you the way you are… Baby, you ain’t ask for that shit. Stop pushing me the fuck away… let me fucking love you, because that’s all I wanna do. I wanna fucking love you so much, Zoya. Baby, you deserve that too… I need you to believe that.”
She chewed on the corner of her lip, looking down before she looked straight into my eyes. “You don’t want what comes with me, I promise. Last time I truly loved, they were snatched away from me. Goo, it’s easier to pretend I don’t want love than to give my heart away… I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You asked me to walk away from homie, right? Begged me to walk away, and I did, right?”
“Yes.”
“I wanted to pull that trigger but thought about you. Thought about how you would feel because I promised you. I’m neverbreaking a promise when it comes to you, Baby. I don’t even need you to say I lov?—”
“I do love you, Goo.” She continued to nervously chew on the side of her lip while looking away from me.
I wrapped my arms around her in a bear hug and fell back onto the bed. “Tell me again, Boobie.”
“Nooo, Gerald.”
“Tell me again.” I held her tightly.
She paused, then stared down at me. “I love you, Gerald.”
“I love you, Zoya…. Hey, look at me.” I held her face, as I stared up into her eyes. “I love you, baby. I’m not going anywhere. Stop pushing me away and let me love you. Let me in on the pain, cause I wanna heal you.”
Her voice was hoarse. “Please. Not tonight… I can’t… I can’t talk about it.”
Leaning up, I kissed her lips softly. “You fucked this room up… I got a room in town, and I want you to soak in the bath, eat, and when you’re ready, we gonna talk.”
“Okay.”
“And you gonna go on your trip. Capri and Blair ready to fly out here because they worried.”
“No… I don’t want to do anything for my birthday.”
Aside from a few things she had bought when she got here, she didn’t have much to pack. She handled that, and we left the room. It was a reminder for me to never get her ass mad because I felt bad for whoever had to put this room back together.
When we came back downstairs, Kora had left back to her hotel. The downstairs lights were off.
“We’re over here,” I heard Stevie’s voice, but didn’t see her.
She turned the small lamp next to her on, and she was on the couch while Menace was asleep on her.
“He’s good?” I questioned, holding Zoya’s hand.
Stevie nodded. “He spirals. I know when things hit him harder because he’ll rub his hands raw, and start to repeat himself… you know, it’s not easy being him.” Her eyes looked at Zoya. “Zoy, you alright?”
Zoya stared at her brother, who had his hands tightly around his wife, as he rested his head on her shoulder. Stevie kissed his head, as she pulled the cover over the both of them.
“Yeah.” Her voice was hoarse.
