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“I know,” Kahlan said. “I know that condemning a man to death weighs heavily on him. I, myself, have had to order the deaths of people. In a time of peace, you have the luxury of order, but in war you must act. Hesitation is death.”
“And have you told that to Richard?”
Kahlan smiled. “Of course I have. He knows he did what he had to, and that those of us close to him understand. In his place I would have done the same, and I told him so.”
“Someday, I hope to have a woman of half your strength.” Drefan smiled. “To say nothing of your beauty. Well, I must be off.”
Kahlan watched him walk away. His trousers were still too tight. She blushed at the thought, and turned back to her work.
Nadine was in the sick room, tending to people in two rows of beds. The infirmary held twenty beds, and they were all full, with more people on blankets on the floor. There were others sick in other rooms.
“Thanks,” Nadine said, when Kahlan set down the clean things she had brought. Nadine was putting herbs in pots, making teas. Other women who tended the sick were changing sheets, cleaning and wrapping open sores, or serving tea to the patients.
Nadine plucked a cloth from the basket, dipped it in a basin of water, wrung it out, and laid it across the forehead of a moaning woman. Nadine patted the woman’s shoulder.
“There you go, dear. How does that feel?”
The woman managed only a weak smile and nod.
Kahlan did the same for several more people, dabbing a cool, damp cloth to their sweaty faces, offering soft words of comfort.
“You could be a healer,” Nadine said as she paused beside Kahlan. “You have a kind touch.”
“That’s the only thing I know to do. I couldn’t heal anyone.”
Nadine leaned close. “And do you think I am?”
Kahlan glanced around the room. “I see what you mean. But at least you have devoted your life to helping people. My life is devoted to duty. To fighting.”
“What do you mean?”
“In the end, I am a warrior. My duty is to hurt people in order to save others. It is left to people like you to heal those remaining, when people like me are finished fighting.”
Nadine stood close to her. “Sometimes, I wish I was a warrior, and could fight to end the suffering, so that there wouldn’t be so many wounded for the healers to tend to.”
Kahlan finally had to leave the room. She couldn’t stand the stink, and the smoke was making her sick. Nadine felt the same, and went with her. They both slid their backs down the wall and sat on the floor.
“I feel helpless,” Nadine said. “Back home, if someone had a headache, I’d give him something and he’d get to feeling better. If a woman was pregnant, I’d help settle her stomach, or I’d help deliver the baby when it was time. It seemed I was always helping people.
“This is different. All I do is comfort people who are going to die, and wonder the whole time if it will be me on the bed tomorrow. I don’t know what to do for any of them. I feel totally useless. I wish I’d come here to help these people, instead of watching them die.”
“I know,” Kahlan whispered. “It must have been a lot more satisfying to help a woman deliver a baby.”
Nadine stared off in thought. “Sometimes a woman would tell me that it seemed like it would never happen, that it seemed unreal. She’d wait, knowing it would happen, but never really believing it, dreading the things she’d heard about how hard it would be. Dreading the pain. Sometimes they think things will change, like they’ll wake up one day and not be pregnant, or something.
“Then, the baby would come. Suddenly, she’ll be in a panic. The time has come. She’ll be terrified that it’s really happening, at last. Sometimes they’ll scream just from that fear, the fear of the pain. That’s when I can help them. I’m there with them. I reassure them that it will be all right.
“For the first time, for some of them, they finally believe it’s happening. I guess it’s only natural to dread such a profound change in their lives. Until it’s over, until the day is upon them, some of them are miserable with dread.”
Together, in the silence of the hall, they sat, resting, listening to the moans from the sick room.
“Nadine, you still think you will end up marrying Richard, don’t you?”
Nadine glanced over, scratching her freckled nose, but she didn’t answer.
“I didn’t ask that to—to start in on you, or anything. I just meant, well, like you said, you might end up on one of those beds in there. I was just thinking… it could be me, too. I could get the plague, or something.”
Nadine watched her. “You won’t. Don’t say that. You won’t get it.”
Kahlan ran her thumbnail along a joint in the floorboards. “But I could. I was just thinking that if I did, or something, well, what about Richard? He’d be alone.”
“What are you saying?”
Kahlan looked into Nadine’s soft brown eyes. “If for some reason you ended up being the one with him, instead of me, you’d be good to him, wouldn’t you? You’d always be good to him?”
Nadine swallowed. “Of course I would.”
“I’m serious, Nadine. There’s so much happening. I want to know that you wouldn’t ever hurt him.”
“I’d never hurt Richard.”
“You hurt him before.”
Nadine turned away and scratched her shoulder. “That was different. I was trying to win him. I would have done anything to get him to be with me. I already explained it to you.”
“I know.” Kahlan picked at a little stone stuck in the crack between the floorboards. “But if something happened, and it turned out that you were… the one, the one to marry him, I want to know that you’d never do anything like that to him again.
“I’d like to hear it from you, that you would never do anything to hurt Richard. Anything.”
Nadine met Kahlan’s eyes for a moment before glancing away.
“If I ever ended up with Richard, I would make him the happiest man in the world. I’d take the best care of him that any woman ever took of any man. I would love him better than—well, I’d do my very best to make him happy.”
Kahlan felt the familiar pain gnawing at her insides. She endured it. “Do you swear that that’s the truth?”
“Yes.”
Kahlan looked away and wiped at her eyes. “Thanks, Nadine. That’s what I wanted to know.”
“Why are you asking me such a thing?”
Kahlan cleared her throat. “As I said, I’m worried that I might get the plague, too. If anything happens, I could bear it better if I knew that there was someone who would take care of Richard.”
“Near as I can figure, Richard pretty much takes care of himself. Do you know that that man can cook better than me?”
Kahlan laughed. Nadine laughed with her.
“Isn’t that the truth?” Kahlan said. “I guess, where Richard is concerned, a woman can only hope to go along with him for the ride.”
“Lord Rahl!”
Richard turned to see General Kerson calling out for him. He let go of Kahlan’s hand. Cara glided to a stop behind Kahlan.
“Yes, what is it, general?”
The general came to a halt, waving a letter. A dusty, tired looking soldier followed behind, along with the general’s usual guard.
“A message from General Reibisch, with his army to the south.” The general lifted a thumb. “Grissom here just rode in.”
Richard glanced to the young soldier, still panting to get his breath. He smelled like a horse. Richard thought he would much rather smell like a horse and be out riding than sitting in a little room day after day translating the mad account of a trial and execution. He guessed that if his labors were doing him any good, he might feel differently.
He broke the seal and opened the letter. When he finished reading it, he handed the letter to Kahlan.
“Take a look.” While Kahlan read the letter, Richard turned to the messenger. “How is our a
rmy to the south doing?”
“Fine when I left them, Lord Rahl,” Grissom said. “The Sisters of the Light caught up with us, as they said you told them to do. They’re all together with our men. We’re awaiting orders.”
The letter had said much the same thing. When Kahlan had finished reading, Richard took the letter and handed it to General Kerson. The general idly scratched his graying hair as he read the letter. He looked up when he had finished.
“What do you think, Lord Rahl?”
“Makes sense to me. I don’t think we should bring all those men back up north right now. As General Reibisch says, they would be in a position to know about it if the Order moves very far into the New World. What do you think?” Richard asked, as he passed the letter back to Cara.
The general hiked up his trousers. “I agree with Reibisch. I’d want to do the same if I were him. He’s already down there, why not put him to good use? As he says, it would be best to know what the Order is up to, and if the enemy does come up north to attack us, he will be in a position to bite their ass.” He winced. “Sorry, Mother Confessor.”
Kahlan smiled. “My father was a warrior, general, before he was king. It brings back memories.” She didn’t say if they were good memories. “I also agree about the strategic advantage of having an army in that position.”
Cara handed the letter back to Richard. “He’s right about one other thing, too. If he abandons his position, and the Order went to the northeast, they would be able to sweep into D’Hara unopposed. We wouldn’t even know about it. That part of D’Hara is sparsely populated. The Order could drive north and we would never know it until they cut west, back into the Midlands.”
“Unless they pushed straight for the People’s Palace,” the general said.
“That would be a fatal mistake—attacking the heart of D’Hara,” Cara said. “Commander General Trimack of the First File of the Palace Guard would show the enemy why no army has ever attacked the palace and had so much as a single soldier live to recount the tale of their bloody defeat. The cavalry would cut them to pieces out on the Azrith Plains.”
