“I still owe you a couple more.”
Julian chuckled then grimaced, resting his head back on her chest. “How long have you been here?”
“I came the morning after you went missing. Your standoff with the police was all over the news. I thought you might call the burner phone or need my help. I wanted to be close by, but you never called me,” Mena said.
“I wanted to, but I lost my phone after I jumped into the waterfall and fell into a cenote. Banged my head pretty bad and almost drowned trying to get out of there. I blacked out for a moment, but it was your voice that urged me to come back. I pushed through the surface of the water and clung to the vines until I could climb out of the cave,” Julian said.
“That sounds horrible. How long did it take you to get out of there?”
“Not sure, two days. Maybe three. I had a nasty bump on my head and was pretty disoriented. After I got out, I kept moving from cave to cave, stealing food from trash cans and trying to hide from the swarm of officers looking for me. A few days ago, I started getting sick. Really weak. Could barely move. Wasn’t sure if something bit me or if it was something I ate. The only thing I could do was hide in the jungle. I covered myself with leaves and hoped I wouldn’t be found.”
“But I found you. I can’t tell you how many people told me to go back to St. Basil. There was no way you survived the fall. That you’d drowned. That you’d gotten away and decided to go off the grid instead of risking being sent back to Tiverton. Every conversation was another dire conclusion about you. I could not get myself to believe any of that was true.”
“Because you know I’d never leave you. The only reason I fought to stay alive was to make it back to you, Mena. This sounds selfish, but I’m glad you stayed and didn’t give up on me,” Julian said.
“I won’t lie. I almost gave up after Sunny came by. She gave me the letter you wrote to me, you know, in case …”
Julian wrapped an arm tighter around Mena’s stomach, the fingers of his free hand stroking her skin with light caresses. “Did you read it?”
“It pissed me off that you’d even write me a letter like that. That you’d even consider there was a chance that you wouldn’t come back to me. I was mad as hell and devastated at the same time. That’s why I ran into the jungle. The paper was burning a hole in my hand and I just wanted to get rid of it. That’s when I tripped over you.”
“Broman wrote Dawn a letter. It took her a long time to read it, but it helped her to get closure about what happened to him. I just wanted to do the same for you.” Julian’s voice was low as he tried to explain himself.
“I’m not Dawn and you’re not Broman. A letter would be a cruel way for you to say goodbye to me. I don’t need your words on paper. I need you fighting like hell so I never have to receive a letter like that in the first place,” Mena said.
“I’m sorry,” Julian whispered.
“Promise me you won’t ever leave me again.”
“I wish I could, but I don’t know what it’s going to take to get out of this mess with Dumay. I could still go to prison if I’m not able to fulfill the deal I made with Adam Russell,” Julian said.
“What kind of deal?”
“Dumay implanted a kill switch in Russell’s heart. An undetectable pacemaker of sorts that she or her brother, Tufa, can control from anywhere and kill him on the spot. That’s how they’ve been killing off the surrogates. These kill switches were implanted into them. Russell wants me to dismantle the remote operation of the kill switch and take out Dumay,” Julian explained.
“And in return?”
“He’s going to give me evidence that proves Dumay set me up so I can help him get free from her. Once that’s done, he’ll give me the laptop. Dumay never had it. Russell has had it all this time,” Julian said.
“Let me get this straight. He wants you to commit cold-blooded murder, so he won’t have to? And you agreed to this?”
Julian was quiet.
“You can’t do that.”
“You mean I can’t put a bullet in the head of the woman responsible for kidnapping and terrorizing you during the past year? For you, for Ella, for the surrogates—she doesn’t deserve to live and continue to hurt people. It won’t be the first time I was deployed to eliminate a threat,” Julian said.
“What if you get caught? Then you’ll go to Tiverton because you’ll be guilty.”
“I was trained to take out enemy threats without leaving a trace. People may suspect, but they’ll never be able to prove anything,” Julian said.
“You’re not a SEAL anymore! The government hasn’t sent you on a mission. This will be premeditated murder, Julian. I can’t lose you if the cops figure out what you did and throw you back in prison.”
Julian inhaled sharply, rising from his position against her. Mena instantly missed the warmth of his body next to hers as he struggled to hold himself up on shaky arms. Julian stared at her for a long moment. Their eyes locked on each other, neither willing nor even able to look away.
“If you want me to walk away from the deal I made with Russell, I’ll do it. For you. Just say the word.”
Mena hesitated. Adam Russell had the key to Julian’s freedom from more than one crime hanging over his head. She didn’t want to deny Julian the chance to get the evidence they both knew he desperately needed, but she couldn’t condone him killing Priscilla to free himself. Finally, Mena said, “There’s got to be another option. Helping Adam without killing Priscilla. Why can’t you do that?”
