“I just want to see if she’s okay,” Pa gruffed, then God and his angels must have come to my rescue because the footsteps filtered away and the main door to my office clicked shut.
I released a sigh I didn’t realize I’d been holding on to. I hadn’t realized I wasn’t breathing.
Xander set me down and pressed his forehead to mine.
“I’m sorry. Jia, I shouldn’t have put you in danger like that,” he breathed.
“It was my fault.”
“Really? Looks a lot more like my fault from where I’m standing... When it comes to you I can’t think straight.” He fixed his pants and surprised me entirely by pulling a tissue from his pocket to clean me off. The care he handled me with was something I savored too, him taking care of me like I was his.
“You were telling the truth.” I gazed up into his eyes.
“The truth?” He focused on me like he wasn’t sure what I was talking about.
“When you said it was real.” I didn’t doubt it when he told me the other day, but it wasn’t spoken in the best of moments.
“Yes ,of course it’s real, but this is dangerous Jia and not what I want for you.” His gaze intensified and I knew he was about to hit me with something serious. A truth I wouldn’t like. “I won’t… say goodbye. I won’t say goodbye when I leave.”
I covered my mouth to keep from crying, surprised I had any tears left.
He smoothed his hand over my cheek and held me closer.
“Jia. It’s best.”
I shook my head. “No… It’s not. Please don’t do that to me. I leave for Europe on Monday.” The words felt so weird to say. I’d always imagined that I’d be happier telling people that. “I leave for Europe on Monday with Armand. Xander…please, if you leave before, if you leave before that just come and see me. Just see me once. But please don’t just disappear and I never see you again. It would kill me.”
It would grieve me to no end if he did that.
He nodded and pulled me into the safety of his heart.
I wished more than anything that I could stay there forever.
Not meant to be though.
It was another hard truth.
Chapter 7
Xander
I wasn’tsure which was worse.
Being with her or being without her.
Both seemed to carry its own weight of grief.
I suppose though that being with her fixed some element of something that had been severed.
Just some element. On some degree, however, it felt like I’d made the situation worse.
Maybe it would have been better to just leave, get out of her life and she’d never see me again.
Now I’d made a promise I might not be able to keep.Another one.
Night fell quickly and brought with it the gravity of the situation.
Wes and I were in full heist mode as we ventured to the park.
