“I’ll let you know when you can come see me. I mean in Italy.” I gave her a little smile.
“I’ll be on the first plane over Jia. I’m sorry, I know I’m not saying much. I just don’t know what to say. I was hoping it wouldn’t get this far. That was what I was hoping. Like some miracle could happen and you wouldn’t go.”
I chuckled. “Well that fairy godmother of mine better hurry up, it’s almost midday and my flight leaves at ten. I have less than twelve hours for a miracle to happen. Let’s say eight. We leave at eight and I reckon once I’m enroute that will be it.” I sounded like I was doing my best. Inside I was crumbling.
“Jesus Jia, it all makes me feel like shit.” She glanced to the door as we heard shuffling again signaling Armand must have been outside.
On instinct we both kept quiet. Quiet for a minute or two.
“Did you buy any nice clothes to take with you?” Anya asked and cocked her head toward the door when Armand shuffled again.
I smiled. The idiot wouldn’t have wanted to hear about my clothes.
“Yes, a few jumpers. The fluffy kind. It can be cold this time of year in Italy. I was thinking of getting those thermal tops too. You know the ones that help to regulate your blood pressure.”
“Oh you should drink garlic tea. My grandma always has that, she gave it to her cat too.”
That did it. I glanced back to the door as he shuffled away. Asshole, he really was listening, probably wanting to hear if I said anything about Xander. He could have made it less obvious by not going the minute we started talking about what would have bored him to death. I wished it would.
Anya rolled her eyes. “We should have been talking about boils and shit. What a prick.”
“I know,” I scuffed.
“Have you spoken to him much?”
“No, I don’t want to.” I hadn’t really spoken to Armand at all since he came here.
“I don’t blame you. We’ve pretty much been up here for just a little over an hour and he couldn’t even pretend to be sociable and get me a drink.”
He hadn’t greeted her properly either when she first arrived.
Back when Armand and I were together he hated that I had a friend like her who wasn’t Italian and what he considered mundane so she wouldn’t have understood our ways. He didn’t understand how Pa allowed me to have her, and he worried I’d share secrets.
I guess he was right on some level. Not many crime families allowed that. We were different. Did things differently. I think Pa thought she represented some kind of normal for me. She was the closest thing I’d had to a normal life so he allowed our friendship.
“Have you thought about the stuff you might have to do with him?” she asked with a tentative expression.
I knew all too well what she meant. Sleeping with him.Fuck. Just kissing him, it would be awful.
“Yes. I have. I have thought long and hard about it.” Thought long and hard and I didn’t know how I was going to flair out.
She sighed. “I wish I could tell you, you’d be okay with that part.”
“I wish I could believe I’d get through that part, it’s gonna be hard.”
Only yesterday I was with Xander. We woke up and I was cocooned in his arms. Within seconds of waking we resumed our activities from the night before. My eyes hadn’t even opened properly yet before he was buried deep inside me.
I sighed and tried to force the memory from my mind.
A knock sounded on the door.
“Come in,” I called out.
The door opened and Armand stepped in. I hadn’t heard the shuffling noise he’d previously made.
I didn’t care.
It was strange he’d knocked though. Maybe that was more for Anya’s benefit since he usually just barged in.
