Berne frowned. Thatwassomething that had bothered him. “Ach, so it is. Entirely alone, for that matter. Where are your people?”
“I don’t like others interfering with my research. My guild has been trying to dissuade me from my investigation for years. Finally, a few weeks ago, they gave me an ultimatum, either stop or be expelled entirely. So, I left. I had everything in place, and they’d made it clear that they wouldn’t be advancing my cause. I will admit now that it probably wasn’t my best idea ever, but these things rarely occur to me in the moment.” She shrugged as if to say there wasn’t any use fretting over it now; it was done. “Now, about this marriage or mating business. They truly believe we are mated because you bit me?”
“We are, but there’s more to it. So, a mating bite is one of the ways that we are mated; it’s often between those of us that are mammal shifters of some kind. Lately, we’ve begun to formalize things more often with a ceremony. I didn’t mean to mate yeh when I bit yeh. It takes more than just a bite. And anyhow, I didn’t bite yeh to bite yeh. I was pulling yeh out of the tree well.” He paused with his shirt held in front of him. He tried to think how best to put it, but when he looked back at her, Sirin was staring at his chest. He felt heat rise in his face and cleared his throat.
He lowered his gaze back to his shirt, needing tofocus.“It’s a two-part process. The bite, and then a cleaning. When I was carrying yeh, I started to worry about what might happen to yeh. So, I cleaned your bite by licking—that’s how it’s done—figuring if we didn’t need it, there was no harm done. Yeh would see a scar and just heal it. That way, though, we would have an option if they were truly intent on execution.” He slumped into the chair at the table, arms on his large thighs, and hung his head. Would she even understand? It sounded so stupid when he said it out loud. It must sound like a crock of shit to her. He thought she might be masking her scent, or perhaps she was really as calm as she looked. He took a deep breath and attacked the crux of the matter.
“I am sorry I trapped yeh here with me. But, I just couldn’t let yeh die after—after I got to know yeh. And, I know I didn’t reallymeetmeet yeh until this morning, but I’ve been following yeh for longer than a week and I just… felt like I knew yeh. Like yeh were already my friend. I never meant to trap yeh.”
She was quiet for longer than he’d have liked, and he realized how much of his people’s communication was non-verbal. With Sirin, she didn’t make any of the subtle noises or movements he expected; her body language was so different as to be incomprehensible.
“You weresupposedto kill me. That was your job.1But you didn’t. Why?“ Sirin asked, eyeing him.
Berne cleared his throat. He hadn’t expected that question. “I asked myself the same thing. At first, yeh just interested me. And yeh weren’t too close yet, so I thought I might just watch over yeh for a bit.” He inhaled, pushing his chest out and rubbing near his clavicle at the ache that had started there. “Catrin and I had a younger sister, Annika. She died when she was fifteen. She was out, studying for her shifted form, so it’s not uncommon for us to be gone for a bit.” He closed his eyes and took a steadying breath before continuing. “She never came back. We looked for weeks. Eventually, we found some of her things with some—remains. I’ve always wished someone had been there for her. That I coulda done something. I think I just didn’t want someone else to die for no reason.”
Sirin nodded, a sad look crossing her face. Her scent spiked as she murmured, “I am so sorry you had to experience that. It’s never easy to lose people you love.”
“No,” he whispered. The pain had lessened with time, but it would never be gone.2“But that wasn’t the only reason, I think. Yeh sparked my interest, I s’pose. Yeh were so vibrant. The more I watched yeh, the more it seemed a shame to lose that, like the world would be less for your absence. Eventually, I felt like I knew yeh, and by then it just wasn’t an option, no matter what I tried to tell myself.”
Sirin blushed and he sucked in a breath. She was beautiful, with her deep eyes and lush curves, but when she blushed, she seemed toglowwith it.
“Thank you. For saving me,” she said. She smiled, looking away from him. “And to be honest, Iamgrateful I get to stay and continue my research. I’m not sure how to navigate—this.“ She indicated between them.
“Well, I’m afraid you’ll have to stay with me. If it doesn’t seem like a true mating, they might go back on their word. So, at least yeh won’t need to find a place to live. I’ll not ask anything of yeh that isn’t freely given. I’ll not pressure yeh for favors at all, so yeh don’t need to worry on that account. You’re welcome to the bed. I can sleep as my bear on the floor and be perfectly comfortable. Yeh don’t—“ His words caught in his throat, sticky with guilt. “Yeh don’t have someone I am keeping yeh from now?”
The worry echoed through his head. It was one thing if they needed to learn how to get along, to learn to love one another, but that would never be possible if he had taken her from someone she loved.
“Berne, you didn’t steal me from anyone,” she assured. “You think anyone I was in a relationship with would let me go haring off into the wilderness alone like this?”
He scoffed, “Sure, I’d not. I’ll tell yeh that.” It was dangerous foranyoneto be out there alone, let alone someone as obviously delectable as Sirin. He’d chased off three separate predators while following her.
Sirin raised an eyebrow.3“Mmm, well—as I said, I am happy to be here, where I conduct my research. Truth be told, this was a scouting mission. If I found something that required extended study, I was prepared to stay wherever I needed long-term.” She rubbed his shoulder and he nodded. She took a deep breath and continued. “And you? Am I now keeping you from someone? Have I not trapped you just as much?”
He snapped his head up to look at her. “No. There’s no one. And yeh haven’t trapped me at all. Yeh likely saved me a deal of trouble. There’s no one here for me, so I was trying to decide if it was worth it to try to leave to find a mate. I’m not great with people as it is. This is the most I have spoken in months.” He lifted a shoulder dejectedly.
“I was torn because I have always wanted bairns, but I just couldn’t see how I was going to leave and integrate into society enough to meet someone. How I was going to determine if they’d fit, if I could trust them? You’re—you’re like a gift. Like I said, I’ll not ask for anything, but you’re more than I ever considered hoping for, and I would be lying if I said I didn’t hope yeh could come to want me back in time.”
She lifted a hand to brush hairs away from his face before cupping his cheek. “Wedidcome to know each other out there, in a way. And I do think we have started a friendship. The way I see it, there are worse foundations for a marriage than friendship and desire.”
Her words flashed through him, fizzing along his skin and settling in his groin. This was more than he ever hoped, more than—No, this wasn’t fair to Sirin. She never asked for this. Hetrickedher and now she was stuck here. Sure, she meant to come here, but she hadn’t signed up for a long-term relationship. He needed to make it very clear he wasn’t looking for anything she didn’t absolutely want. Because hewantedher with everything he had, but if she didn’t want him, he wasn’t interested. “Sirin, I told yeh, I wouldn’t dare presume—“
“Oh shut up, you silly bear,” she said with a blush. “Is it so hard to believe I might want you back, as you hoped? Or is it that you don’t wantme?”
He moved to speak, to tell her that was decidedly not the case, but she placed her hand back on his face, her thumb resting on his lips. Berne inhaled sharply as her thumb ghosted across his lips, his cock thickening instantly. That light touch ignited his veins, desire pulsing through him.
“Berne, I’m not some blushing, inexperienced miss. I’m not going to play coy with you.” Sirin lowered her voice, her deep whisper dragging along his skin. “These breaths, your pulse, that hardness in your trousers, they tell me yehmightwant me back. I know whatIwant, Berne, and now I have a husband. I find I want to…explorehim. But I need yeh to tell me whatyehwant.”
He’d steeled himself, prepared for the inevitability she wouldn’t want him, that she wouldn’t reciprocate the soul-crushingneedhe felt for her. Resigned himself to fast releases in the woods behind his house until she welcomed him into what he now thought of as her bed.
He should’ve known when he’d run into her in the forest. Her scent on the breeze, her excited gasp, and her gleeful dance had made him smile stupidly, his large tongue hanging out of his mouth. He marveled at how only yesterday he’d thought he was still torn about what to do with her when he’d already been careening toward her. He should have known she would have his heart, and his cock, in her hands for the taking.
Berne’s breath punched out of him at her words, and he swallowed before speaking. With his luck, his voice would crack like a cub’s if he didn’t.
“I’m here, for your exploring if you’d like.” Sitting with his arms wide, he indicated he was hers to command. He hoped she didn’t look too closely at his hands, which trembled like the last stubborn leaves of autumn. Berne wasn’t exactly inexperienced either, but it had been quite some time, and he didn’t think he’d ever wanted anyone near as much. Did he even properly remember what todo?He would come the second she touched him if he wasn’t careful.
She pursed her lips for a moment, immediately causing him to imagine them wrapped around his shaft, and he groaned despite himself. He could imagine how fucking delicious she would look, how slick, how hot she’d feel wrapped around him. How he was inso much fucking trouble.
Goddess damn yeh for an idiot, Berne. Could yeh not have taken five fucking minutes before falling asleep to wank off so yeh don’t go off like a volcano.
