Illarion chewed his lower lip. “This is not a trick question?”
Valerius laughed and winced as his head hurt. “No, my friend, it is not.”
“Your… friend?” Illarion said the word as if it had a strange taste.
“Like you, I would have said that I could handle things on my own, but, also like you, I know I cannot,” Valerius told him. It felt so strange, yet right, confessing this to Illarion. “We were born into a simpler time where life was cheap, including our own. We cannot respond to the problems of today with our old ways. We need to change. And we need to do it together.”
Illarion laughed bitterly. “I know I am not some intellectual like Mei or Esme or Jahara! My ways don’t work. I can bring nothing to you.”
“You’re wrong,” Valerius told him. He licked his lips. This was going to be difficult to say. “Illarion, I have always feared that we would fight.”
“You don’t think you could win?” Illarion scoffed.
“Only at great cost,” Valerius admitted.
Illarion stared. “You admit… admit this?”
“You are very strong, Illarion. You just weaken yourself by your bluster,” Valerius said. “You are a formidable opponent and when I heard what you were doing to your people--”
“I know you disapprove!”
“I do, because it is wrong. But I thought it was because you had slipped back into the oldest ways of thinking,” Valerius stated.
“Do you think I wish to rule over a prison?” Illarion shook his head in disbelief.
“I just thought you wanted to rule no matter what,” Valerius answered.
“I do. I… don’t. I don’t know anymore! There is no joy. Coming here… supposedly, to the house of my enemy was the…” Illarion clearly was fighting against himself for the next words, but he spit them out, “was the safest I have felt in a long time. With you… I knew I was safe.”
“I wish that feeling was not an illusion,” Valerius grimaced.
“It isn’t!” Illarion laughed, a little sadly. “It isn’t, Valerius. And now you have Caden to protect us both.”
Valerius let out a laugh. “I shouldn’t laugh. It’s true.”
“He has more courage in that little form than in… well, than in our big bodies,” Illarion stated. “So fierce!”
“Yes, yes, he is. They are,” Valerius amended. Then he said, “If you wish, I will help you with your territory. If it is not just this creature’s influence… I will help.”
Illarion considered this. “I do not see how, but… I am out of ideas anyways.”
“All I know is that I need you and Mephous to help against the Behemoth. We cannot do this with you,” Valerius told him, which was much like what Caden had, but cost more to say.
“You need me?” Illarion repeated him again.
“Yes, I need you.”
“You said that like you mean it,” Illarion said slowly.
“I do. Considering I am flat on my back and cannot get up, how can you not believe me?” Valerius flashed him a genuine smile.
The tension that had filled Illarion bled out. He ran a hand over his head. “I believe you. Though I do not know what good I can do if we cannot fight the Behemoth.”
“I don’t just mean your physical strength,” Valerius said. “We need to help one another, not just with the Behemoth, but with everything. I know the others have not said much, but I am certain they are in similar spots to you and I.”
“Mei’s army,” Illarion said softly. “One does not build so many machines if one feels secure. She trusts no one. Not human or Shifter. Just those machines.”
“Yes,” Valerius sighed. “That shows a problem, doesn’t it?”
