He sighed deeply. “Decades of bluster and terrible spells.”
She tilted her head back where she could look at his face. “Are you truly never afraid?”
He glanced at her, then looked up at the ceiling. “Do you honestly believe I’ll answer that?”
“You might,” she said. “If you think it will help me.”
“Ye gads, woman,” he said faintly. “The things you say.”
She only waited. He glanced at her, frowned, then looked back up at the ceiling. He was silent for so long, she wondered if he wouldn’t answer her after all. In the end, though, that lad there was never afraid, not even of prying questions. He’d said so on more than one occasion.
“I was afraid once,” he said slowly. “And if you repeat this, I’ll deny it.”
“I never would.”
“Which is why I’ll be honest with you.” He let out his breath slowly. “I was, as it happened, nosing about in a place where I shouldn’t have been.”
She leaned up on her elbow and looked at him. “You?”
“I know,” he said dryly. “So out of character.”
“I’m guessing you were rummaging through someone’s solar, looking for things they might not want to share?”
He put his hand on her back, perhaps to keep her from fleeing, though she suspected he was patting her in an effort to soothe himself.Thatwas definitely something she wasn’t about to point out to him.
“Exactly that,” he said. “The mage in question lives in a tatty little keep just over the border from Tor Neroche. I had reason to believe he might be hiding a spell very like Diminishing under the blotter on his desk, so I walked right in his front door, bold as brass, and ran up the stairs to his solar. Surprisingly enough, he caught me at it.”
“You must have been very young,” she said in surprise.
He lifted his eyebrows briefly. “You would think so, but let’s just say the memory is rather too fresh for my taste. I’ll admit that I was very surprised to find that his solar was completely impervious to any of my escape attempts. The only place akin to it that I’ve ever seen is Uachdaran’s dungeon. Lothar of Riamh, though—” He paused. “Without giving you details that will leave you with nightmares, I’ll just say that to save my own sweet self, I actually uttered the wordplease.”
She could hardly believe her ears. “You didn’t.”
He smiled. “How flattering that you find it as preposterous as I do. I did nip out a window after he’d opened it to air the place out thanks to a particularly fragrant manuscript I lit on fire in a final effort to irritate him.”
“Is that true?”
“Mostly,” he said. “I also may have clunked him over the head with a candlestick as he was turned the other way, raging over his papers that I’d mussed whilst about the goodly work of trying to find his spell of magic thievery.”
“But surely you weren’t afraid.”
“I was beyond afraid,” he said, “but again, I’ll never admit as much. The only place I’ve been more afraid was Léige when I thought I might never see you again.”
“Honestly?” she asked, ignoring the way her heart broke a little at his words.
He put his hand behind her head, then leaned up and kissed her briefly. “Honestly,” he said.
“What of saving the world from that mage outside?” she managed.
“That has always been substantially farther down the list of things that keep me up at night.” He lay back down, then reached for her hand to put it palm-down on his chest. He covered it with his own, then sighed. “Sladaiche isn’t without power, but I’m not afraid of him. I’m furious that Soilléir has left me unable to see to him properly, something for which I will definitely repay him when I’m able.”
“I imagine he knows that.”
“I remind him of it every time we meet.” He paused, then looked at her. “I think we should leave today, if you’re not opposed to it. Inntrig is close enough that we’ll reach it by sunset without hurrying if we go now. I’ll be able to cover us in spells to get us there safely, though I can’t guarantee they’ll be pleasant.”
She wondered if they might be making any journey at all with how weary he looked. “Are you certain?”
He rubbed his hand over his face, then shook his head and sat up, pulling her with him. “The exhilaration of being in a library where I’m not supposed to be will perk me right up, I’m sure. Why don’t you fetch your gear and I’ll meet you in the kitchen? We’ll slip out the back and be on our way. We might even manage to elude that damned spell of death out front if we’re particularly canny.”
