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A sudden urge flared in my mind to lie about some booty call with some hot girl. Better that than for Jean to think I was just standing out here all alone for no reason, like some loser. But I pushed the urge aside. "Cramping my style?" I echoed. "You're the one out on the hot date."
Her puffy turquoise jacket covered her from neck to knee, but she still had to be cold. "Why don't you head back inside? It's freezing out here."
"Soon," she said.
"Ada's dealing with all the noise well."
"I think she's loving the attention." Jean looked through the window, watching Nell hold the baby while Pat had an apparently very serious conversation with the small child. "I worried you were going to give me crap about her reindeer suit."
"Nuh, reindeers have antlers. They can be fierce." I tilted the soft foam antlers on my head in her direction. Kind of underlining my point.
"Ah." She laughed, then sighed. "Are you thinking about the offer for the bar?"
"I was, actually."
"Come to any decisions yet?"
I shook my head. "No, I haven't."
"Sure you're not tempted to sell and buy a bike, hit the road?"
"I'd freeze my ass off doing it this time of year."
Jean looked to heaven. "How about a car then? A very fancy, fast, and cool car?"
"I don't know." I ummed and ahhed for a minute. "Not a bad idea. But I don't think so. Funny, I always dreamed about getting out of town, heading for the West Coast and living in a big city. Do big things."
"And now?"
"Now, not so much," I said. "The three weeks I spent in L.A., they honestly weren't as great as I'd hoped they'd be. Maybe I've grown out of the bright lights and getting lost in the crowd thing, you know?"
"Yes. I know."
"Or maybe I'm just slowly turning into a grump like my dad. Probably start yelling at people to get off my lawn any day now."
She laughed.
"If we did wind up selling, I think maybe I'd open my own place."
Her smile held a hint of sly. "Be the big boss for real, huh?"
"You know it." I smiled back at her, ignoring the tinge of embarrassment over remembering the shit I'd told her about being sole owner when we met. That was months ago. Things had changed. Mostly. "Though it might not be enough money for that. Also, there could be legal complications over going into competition. Anyway, are you having a good time? How's your hot date going?"
"Great."
"Good." I stared at my brogues. "Yeah..."
From inside came the faint sound of a baby crying. Jean turned to go. "She's must be getting tired. I know I am."
"Did you want me to go?" I offered. "Might be able to get her to chill so you can hang out with Andre a bit longer."
"That's okay." She huddled down in her coat. "It's nearly nine-thirty. Way past our bedtime. Well, our official bedtime anyway."
"Okay."
Her smile was soft and pretty as she slipped inside and went straight to Ada. Andre gathered up the baby bag, ready to walk them home. It was weird seeing another man step in, doing the things I normally did for her. Honestly, I fucking hated it ... big-time. My hands curled into fists, jaw rigid as I watched from outside. People waved and blew kisses, wishing them a good night. Nell probably loved seeing them together. And I wanted to be happy seeing Jean have a good time. But it just wouldn't stick.
If my antlers had been real, Andre would have been in serious trouble.
*
Christmas and New Year's passed in a blur. First came the traditional Christmas Eve showing of Die Hard with Alex joining Joe and me for our yearly ritual. Followed by Christmas Day with the folks. Dad didn't grumble about the state of the world too much and Alex got Mom tipsy, resulting in her telling all sorts of funny stories from when Joe and I were little. Like the time I found out people got wrinkles as they got older and promptly told the sweet old lady next door she was about to die. Clearly I'd always been a hit with the ladies. Altogether, it turned out to be not a bad day. I tried stopping by Jean and Ada's place a couple of times, but my timing was off. They were either resting or out at Nell and Pat's.
The Dive Bar was packed for New Year's Eve. It was insane. Even with Vaughan, Joe, and me all working nonstop, the line for drinks was steady. I staggered up the stairs to home in the small hours of the morning, dead on my feet. Only to find Andre making out with some woman in the hallway that led to my room. That led to Jean's room.
For a moment, I thought he had Jean up against the wall, and my heart seemed almost to stop. But her hair was blond, and she was the wrong height.
Fright turned to anger.
"What the fuck?" I hissed, keys in hand.
"Huh?" He lifted his head from the smiling blonde's neck. "Hey, Eric. Good night?"
"We need to talk."
Pained lines filled his face. "Now?"
"Right now."
The blonde was petite and thin, yet missing all of Jean's curves. Sure, she had a nice face. But where was the character? Jean's sharp nose and wide lips were way more interesting. Andre was a goddamn fool and kicking his ass sounded like a fine way to end the night.
The man licked his lips, fussing with his own keys for a minute to get the door open. "Sorry, Christina. Mind waiting inside for me? I won't be a minute."
"Sure." She shot me a look of displeasure. Whatever.
Once she was gone and the door closed, Andre stood tall, hands on hips. "What's the problem?"
"What's the problem, seriously? How about Jean?"
His brows jumped. "That's why you're cock-blocking me?"
My muscles turned to stone. I was going to kill the shit.
"I escorted her to the Christmas party, yes. You know Jean and I also had pizza together the other night too," said Andre, smoothing back his hair. "Does that mean we're married now?"
"It means you need to show some respect."
"How am I disrespecting her?" He held his hands wide. "She's nice and I like her. Don't even mind the kid, for that matter. But Jean and I are friends, Eric, that's all."
"Does she know that?" I asked.
"Yes."
I just stared at him.
"She's not interested in me like that."
"Hang on," I growled. "Did you make a move on her?"
"No, of course not." He seemed pretty certain and a little pissed off. Made two of us
. "Eric, I think I'm old enough to tell if a woman's into me or not. Though I wasn't looking for anything when I asked her to hang out."
"Then why did you?"
He shrugged. "She's on her own, doesn't know a lot of people. Seemed like the right thing to do."
Meanwhile, the muscles in my jaw and neck felt tight enough to break. "You sure?"
Andre hung his head for a moment, exhaling hard. "Jesus, I had no idea. You really need to talk to her sometime soon."
"About what?"
"Don't try that shit with me," he said, gaze fixed. "You've had your head messed up about her ever since she arrived."
"She just had a baby."
"Didn't stop you from imagining she and I were suddenly joined at the hip, did it?"
Huh. Sort of true. Or definitely true. One of those.
"I sympathize, man. I really do." He put his hand on the door. "But I also have a beautiful woman waiting for me to take her to bed. So you and your problems are going to have to wait."
I hesitated.
"Go and sleep. You need it," he said. "And dude, maybe you should seriously think about getting laid. You've made your point to Nell and the rest of them. It might help you relax."
"Maybe." God knows, just like the song said, masturbation had long since lost its thrill. But now I was pretty much confused about fucking everything. Besides being exhausted. "You're definitely not hurting her by doing this?"
"Not even a little. Night, man."
"Morning."
The douchebag wiggled his fingers bye-bye before disappearing inside his apartment. I lingered in the hallway, lost in my thoughts. Soon enough the sound of feminine giggles and moans started up. And I stood outside his door listening like a pervert. Nice. Though it was probably as close as I would be getting to sex anytime soon, what with my fascination for all things Jean. Fascination wasn't an emotion. It wasn't love or anything. It was just like ... you know, a thing.
I trudged into my apartment, slipping off my tiepin and unknotting my tie, tossing them on the sideboard. If you couldn't dress up for New Year's, when the hell could you? Next, I toed off my boots and socks, then just kind of gave up on life and getting undressed and fell into bed. Stone-cold sober and alone at the end of one hell of a New Year's Eve party. These days, I barely recognized myself. What a sad sap I'd become.
On the other hand, Andre and Jean were just friends. Excellent news. I fell asleep soon after with a smile on my face.
*
