The familiar emptiness of loneliness and the oppressive weight of confinement engulfs me. I don’t want anyone to find out about my runs. It’s the only spark of enjoyment left in my life, and I can’t lose it. I’m so lost in my thoughts that I don’t hear Aidan come in until he opens the shower door. His silhouette fills the frame, and the scalding hot shower turns ice cold.
“What the fuck is this?” he snarls, pointing to the tiny remnants of mud on the tiles that I haven’t cleaned yet. “Why can’t you even keep a tidy home? What the fuck is wrong with you? Go. Clean. It. Up,” he berates, spittle flying as his eyes narrow in suspicion. I comply at once, rushing to clean before I have even dried or dressed myself. I never want to give him another reason to be mad. It’s something I know well to avoid and I’m usually better at making sure everything is perfect all the time. I curse myself for being so careless, even if it is only three or four small droplets of mud.
“I… I’m so s… sorry. I thought I had enough time to clean up before you would be home.” I never used to stammer, but the fear I feel around Aidan has changed a lot about how I act.
He stands back with his arms crossed, watching me scrub the floors on my hands and knees. Completing tasks nude is something I’m used to, but it still leaves me utterly humiliated. I won’t complain or try to change it though. If I’m honest with myself, I’ll do anything to avoid a beating at this stage. Instead, I stay bent, silent, waiting with bated breath because I know what awaits me if I don’t.
He walks to me as I finish scrubbing the floors. Without a moment’s hesitation, his heavy boot connects with my stomach, the impact knocking the wind from my lungs. Searing pain explodes in my abdomen as I’m thrown against the wall, the impact knocking the air from my lungs and leaving me crumpled on the hard ground. I curl into myself, a harsh cough tearing from my throat, a rattling sound in the silence. I won’t beg him to stop, though. There’s no point.
“You’re lucky we have visitors tonight and I want you looking the part,” he snarls as he wraps his hand in my long blonde hair, pulling me upright. My scalp screams as I scramble to keep up with him before he rips the hair out. It takes so much energy not to fight back or even try to shield myself. But I’ve learned over the past three years that Aidan only stops when he is satisfied that he has adequately hurt and humiliated me enough.
“Go get ready. Wear the tight red dress tonight. We have a visiting Alpha for dinner, and I need you looking good.”
Goddess, I hate the red dress. It’s skintight and low-cut, exposing every curve. My breasts aren’t exactly big, but I can’t wear a bra with that dress. I sigh internally, resigned to an uncomfortable night, and nod my agreement. But that obviously isn’t the right thing to do. Aidan’s expression morphs and I swallow, realizing that I’m in trouble. He grabs my hair again, wrenching it as he angles my head to face him.
“You respond ‘Yes, Alpha’ when I give you an order.”
He’s forcing me to look at him now where usually I’m not allowed to make eye contact. We’ve been together for three years and the rules keep changing. At first, when he got angry, I blamed myself. I believed him when he told me I forced him into these moods. That he was teaching me how to be a better mate and Luna. I know better now, but it’s too late. He’s broken me down to the point I can’t imagine ever having the strength to leave him.
“Yes, Alpha,” I whisper. He shoves me away, barely contained rage visible on his perfect face as he sneers at me. His good looks are a perfect mask for the ugliness beneath. His piercing green eyes, towering height, and black hair make him the very definition of tall, dark, and handsome. He might be conventionally attractive, but when I look at him, all I feel is fear. His defined muscles only serve as a reminder of how much stronger than me he is.
He storms away, and I wrap my arms around myself. I wish it was possible for me to protect myself. He’s at the door when he turns back to say, “You better fix your attitude;you’re twenty-one in two months, and if you’re not a better mate by the time I can finally claim you, well, let’s just say I’m going to be forced to increase your training.”
My hands shake violently as a bone-chilling shiver races down my spine. I sink to the floor as soon as the door clicks closed, leaving me alone again. My heart pounds, and my breathing comes in rapid gasps because I remember exactly what he means. I don’t think I can survive any more of histraining.
I won’t allow myself to wallow for long. I can’t. I need to be at the pack house to welcome our guests and I need to look pretty while I do it. Looking good and being the alpha’s glorified slave is all I’m suited for, after all.
I stand behind Aidan inside the door of the main pack building, awaiting our guests. We always greet guests here because it's the most ornate and well-appointed building in the pack. Aidan never misses a chance to impress, and it’s vital that everything—including me—looks the part. Our visitors tonight are Alpha John Anderson and Beta Caleb Cooper from one of our allied packs, Iron Fang.
“John, Caleb, so wonderful to see you again,” Aidan beams at them. “You remember my future Luna, Emily?” His jovial tone is so contradictory to the man who kicked and threatened me mere hours earlier. But I smile softly, and I don’t flinch when Aidan places his hand on my back.
“Oh yes, hard to forget when she looks like that,” laughs John as his gaze travels down my body. He licks his lips as his eyes lock on my chest. My skin crawls and I have to remind myself that this is a positive thing. Aidan will be happy that another alpha sees me as attractive. John is a pale blond shifter who is tall but less muscular than most alphas. Although he has a darkness to him, that makes him seem just as intimidating. He has always made me uneasy. He’s one of only three others whom Aidan seems to like spending time with. Everyone else simply fills a role.
“How long until your mating ceremony?” John asks.
“Just over two months. We’re doing it old school.” Aidan smirks while snaking his arm around my waist, pulling me in closer to him.
“Seriously?" rasps John. "Please tell me you’ll let ranked wolves from other packs watch.” His eyes are shining as he looks between us. He’s practically salivating, but I haven’t got a clue why.
You’re okay with a public claiming?” Caleb asks me with a raised eyebrow. His questioning tone is reserved and cold, but not unkind. I hadn’t met Caleb before tonight. He's a Black man with tightly shaved hair, broad shoulders and a muscular build. I know he came from a pack somewhere in Louisiana and recently challenged the previous beta for his position. Aidan was furious about it. He said something about not being able to trust a new guy while taking his anger out on me.
Aidan laughs and assures our guests that I am aware of my place. Anger flashes across Caleb’s face for half a second before he schools his features. The change was so quick, I’m not fully sure it was real.Pathetic Emily, looking to strangers to rescue her.
“And what place would that be?” he questions.
Aidan and John both laugh before Aidan answers. He stares straight into Caleb’s eyes as he says, “Emily’s place is wherever I want it. Isn’t that right, Emily?” He states as he pushes me harshly to my knees without even looking at me.
A wave of shame washes over me, hot and prickly, but I quickly respond, “Yes, Alpha.” My voice betrays none of my inner turmoil. I am well aware of the consequences of disagreement, especially in public, no matter how humiliating or degrading his actions are. Aidan pulls me up again by my hair, now that he has made his point. I keep my head down to avoid anyone’s gaze. I can’t comprehend what’s worse; sympathy, pity, or the callousness of someone who is just glad it’s not them.
I don’t understand what he meant by ‘old school’ or ‘public claiming’. My wolf is howling inside me and urging me to push back. I should trust her instinct; she knows when to fight and when to run. I wish I had listened to her the first time she told me to leave, but I’m too much of a coward. She deserves better than such a weak person to share a body with.
I need to find out what everyone is talking about, even though I know it’s risky to ask questions right now. “What exactly does old school mean?” I ask, my voice laced with trepidation. Fear floods my mind, unsure of what response I’ll get.
“It means, Emily, that I will invite the entire pack, as well as our neighboring ranked wolves, to watch as I claim you,” Aidan responds coolly.
“Claim me? You mean the Luna ceremony?” I ask tentatively. I can’t shake the intense dread that fills me. A physical weight settles in my chest. In the back of my mind, I knowthat Alphas publicly mated their Lunas in the past, but nobody does that anymore. Surely he couldn’t mean the sexual part of the claim? Shifters have evolved to be more human than animal. Public matings are pretty universally acknowledged as a barbaric relic of the past.
“Don’t act all innocent. You’re the slut who loves to spice things up,” he laughs as I cringe at his harsh words. “Might as well show everyone what a whore you are for my cock.” I gasp at hearing him speak about me like this. Aidan has always been awful to me privately, but he has never spoken like this before in front of others. My eyes sting with unshed tears and my cheeks burn with shame.
