“Don't act so surprised,” she says. She wipes her cheeks, eyes flashing with a hint of her usual fire. “Someone had to be thinking rationally, and I was the obvious choice.”
There she is. My brat. My fierce, impossible, perfect mate.
My chest aches with the need to make everything better for her. The way I used to. I loved being the one who could make things right for her and be there for her when I couldn’t. Nothing will make losing Ryan okay. But I need to be there for her and do everything possible to stop that from happening.
It’s only been twenty minutes when Ryan begins to stir. I shoot off a mindlink to keep Doc appraised, hating that the reason he needs to know the time frame is that he anticipates we may need to tranquilize him again.
The reply is curt: “Call if he spirals again.”
Ryan lets out a low groan and rubs his eyes before opening them and looking around. “What’s going on?” He looks from Sofia to me for answers, and I’m not sure where to even start.
“Doc had to shoot you with a tranquilizer.”
Ryan’s gaze flickers between us. “Shit. So, you know?” he asks, running his hands down his face before making eye contact.
“That you’re losing your mind?” Sofia asks, her voice rising several octaves. “Yeah, we know. The question is, how long have you known and why the fuck didn’t you tell us?”
Ryan groans again as he sits up and hangs his head in his hands. For the first time in years, he looks fragile. Vulnerable. Not our unstoppable Alpha. Just a man breaking apart.
My best friend has always been so sure of himself, even when he was thrown into the role of alpha way too young. He had a way of instilling confidence in his ability to lead the pack.
“I didn’t want you to have to worry,” he admits. “I’m only thirty years old, for fate’s sake. I should have been able to find her before it was too late.”
“This is why you have been visiting other packs so much?” Sofia asks.
“Yeah. I thought I had enough time to figure it out before anyone noticed. But there are no packs left in North America that I haven’t visited. I know she’s not dead. My wolf can feel a connection. But I can’t find her.”
“What if she’s one of the missing omegas?” I ask.
“Yeah, maybe,” he sighs, and I can tell he doesn’t want to get his hopes up.
“It’s time for you to consider a chosen mate,” Sofia says firmly. Ryan lets out a low growl at her suggestion, and I pull her to the other side of me. I never thought I would see the day I didn’t trust Ryan, but he’s not himself anymore.
“I’m not setting myself up for a fucking rejection in ten years' time. I won’t end up like Dad!” He jumps from the couch and starts pacing the room, every muscle coiled tight, fury radiating off him. “I’d rather fucking die.”
“Don’t you dare,” I snarl before I can stop myself. The idea of losing him claws at my insides. But even worse is the thought of Sofia left shattered and alone.
“You can’t give up,” I say as Sofia pushes around from behind me. Again. I keep blocking her, and she refuses to stand back. She’s so damn stubborn.
“You don’t get to give up,” Sofia says. “You don’t get to leave me alone. You hold on until we get those omegas out. Until you find her.”
“I don’t exactly have a lot of options,” Ryans grits out. “This is the reason you both need to accept the bond. It makes sense. Maybe she’s one of the missing omegas, but maybe not. If I’m not supposed to find my mate, then you can become alpha and luna of Lunar Eclipse. The pack will be safe.”
Sofia’s answering laugh is bitter, sharp as glass. “That’s not happening. I’m not going to let anyone strong-arm me into a bond I don’t want, not you, and sure as hell not him. You are not going to just give up, Ryan. And in case it wasn’t obvious, you can’t fucking make me.” Her voice is calm and determined. It’s sexy as hell when she’s not directing it at me, even if I do hate the words coming out of her mouth.
But still, my wolf howls in pain at the certainty in her voice. Every time I feel like I’m getting somewhere, she shuts me down again.
Ryan simmers, his head hanging low as the cogs in his head turn.
“How long?” he grits out. “How long have you known you could resist my alpha command?” And, fuck, I want the answer to this question, too.
“Since always. I figured it was easier to sneak out if you thought I was listening when you commanded me to stay in my room till morning or not date. Probably shouldn’t have assumed immunity didn’t only apply to alpha males. Probably should have also commanded the warriors to stay away from me instead.”
She winks, and I take it back; I don’t want her to sass him, either. We both let out a growl at the realization that none of what we thought about her teen years is accurate. Who the fuck has she been dating in the shadows?
“Who do I need to kill?” I ask, my tone conveying the darkness of my threat. But Sofia only scoffs and rolls her eyes before telling me we have more important things to worry about than who she dated. I seriously need to teach this brat a lesson when we sort out Ryan’s shit.
“Anyway, it doesn’t matter,” Ryan says with a sigh. “I can’t take a chosen mate. There’s no one I want, no one my wolf will consider.”
