I clap my hands, and the warriors take off. Sofia remains silent. It’s eerie.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Sofia
My head is a mess leaving the training hall. I barely notice the chill of the fall breeze on my bare arms. Or the scent of pine in the woods. My mind won’t stop circling, replaying Luca’s words, his apology, the sincerity in his tone.
It would be easier if he stayed my nemesis. When he was cruel, I understood how to hate him. When he was distant, I knew how to guard myself. But this version of Luca—apologetic, vulnerable, promising he won’t give up—he’s harder to fight. Harder to resist.
And I don’t know what the hell to do with that.
I can’t talk to Emily because Jackson needs her right now. Ryan isn’t exactly able to stay neutral on things. I can’t talk to Simon or Mike, because they don’t know the full story and they’re currently running a marathon. None of my human friends would understand in the slightest.
Shit.
I guess I’m stuck with my own head. Which is basically an echo chamber. I don’t want to give in. I don’t want to trust Luca. Orbelieve him when he says he pushed me away because he was too into me to be around me. My wolf whimpers, encouraging me to go back. To talk to him. To trust him.
But I don’t want to.
I don’t want to let him get close enough to hurt me again.
“Sofia,” Luca calls out, as if my thoughts summoned him. “Can we talk?”
I breathe in through my nose before letting out a long breath through my mouth. Am I any better than him if I push him away now the same way he pushed me away before? When my wolf wants him, and my body does too.
“What do you want, Luca?” I ask. My voice sounds tired and weary. Accurate. I am tired. Tired of the push and pull, of wanting him one second and hating him the next. I stiffen, shoulders squared, before slowly turning toward him. He jogs down the steps of the pack house, his dark hair ruffled by the wind, his blue eyes locked on me. He really is unfairly attractive.
“I’m sorry,” he says when he reaches me.
“You said that,” I reply sharply. My wolf snarls at me, begging me to give in to him, let him make it up to me.
“I know. I just…” he trails off. He stretches his arms out and then places his hands behind his head. Almost like he’s trying to restrain himself, but his arms want to move towards me of their own volition. The way mine do towards him.
“I can’t take it back. I can’t erase how badly I fucked up. I won’t ask you what I need to do, because that’s not fair to you. Youshouldn’t have to do my mental labor. But I can promise this—I’ll be here from now on. I’ll be better. I’ll work to be enough for you.”
He takes a deep breath and drops his arm, his shoulders slumping. “If you… if you need to reject me so that I can prove this isn’t only the mate bond… well, I won’t try to stop you.”
I rear back at his words, and my wolf howls in pain. “You’re okay with me rejecting you?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.
“No, I’m not okay with you rejecting me. I still want to throw you over my lap and spank your ass for trying to do it in the first place. But if that’s what you need to start trusting me? Fine. I’ll show you how much you mean to me even without the bond.”
This is what I wanted. From the first moment of finding out we were fated, I wanted to get rid of our bond. So why does it feel like a claw just sliced through my heart? Why does the idea of losing our connection make my stomach turn? My wolf keens, clawing at me, begging me not to push him away.
“Well, not that I need your permission, but thanks, I guess?” I snap, trying to claw back some of my power again. “I’ll wait until after the omegas are freed, obviously, but then there’s no reason to keep pretending that I’m going to accept you.”
I throw him my best glare, but the heat is gone out of it. And if I don’t have that, what do I have?
Goddess, I feel so damn alone. I wish my mom were here. The version of her she was before everything changed. I wish my dad could bother to give a fuck. I wish I had made more friends when I was a kid rather than following Luca and my brother around like a lost puppy.
“Sofia,” Luca says, his tone stern and unyielding all of a sudden. He grips my chin and lifts my face to his. Our hot breath mingling together and my heart continues to disintegrate. “Don’t twist my words in your head. I’m not going anywhere. Even if you reject me. Even if the rejection kills me. I’m still always going to be yours.”
A single tear rolls down my face. The warmth turns cold before it’s halfway down my cheek. Luca looks at me. The old Luca. The one who always had my back. The one who made me laugh, who never let me feel alone. He pulls me against his chest, arms strong, the way he used to when I was a kid and the world felt too heavy.
“Why didn’t you ever call me when you went to beta training?” I blurt out, unable to hold the question in, even if it does make me sound needy and pathetic.
“I don’t know,” Luca says with a sigh. “I missed you so much, but I was starting to feel weird about it the older you got. You weren’t a kid, but you weren’t an adult either. I wasn’t sure how to interact with you.”
“What does that even mean?”
