The ax bit into the wood again and again, each strike echoing in the quiet morning air.The physical exertion helped focus my mind, but it couldn't silence the doubts completely.
I thought about the conversations we'd had—the way she looked at me when she thought I wasn't paying attention.There was something in her gaze that made me want to believe in second chances, but I knew better.Second chances were a luxury men like me couldn't afford.
The logs piled up around me as I worked through my thoughts.Sweat trickled down my back despite the cold air.
The ax bit into the wood, each strike a desperate attempt to keep my thoughts at bay.I couldn't afford to think about Claire, about the warmth of her smile or the softness in her eyes.I needed the rhythm, the repetition, the distraction.
"There you are," a familiar voice broke through my concentration."Here, I brought you coffee."
I turned to look at her, and my heart squeezed with want.Claire stood there, her hair catching the morning light like a halo.She looked like a goddess—those wide, expressive eyes and gentle features that seemed almost ethereal in their beauty, curves hidden under a winter coat.
All I wanted was to sweep her into my arms and kiss her until I couldn't remember any of it—the past, the pain, the reasons why I had to keep my distance.To feel her warmth, to claim some of it as if I had any right to it at all.
She held out the steaming mug."I thought you might need this."
"I'm good," I replied brusquely, trying to keep my voice steady.
I dropped the ax and stepped around her, each step heavy with unspoken words.
I hated doing it.
God, I sounded like an asshole.
Iwasan asshole.
But if I didn't do this now, I wasn't going to do it at all.
I needed to rip the bandage off.I needed to stop this before I couldn't, and dammit, I didn't want to.
"Christian?"she called after me."Are you okay?"
Fuck, her voice.
That uncertainty.
It wasn't her fault.
None of it was.
I stopped walking but didn't turn around.The words hung in the air between us, heavy and full of unspoken truths.
This was it.If I didn't do it now, I knew I wasn't going to.It was for her own good.I was doing this for her.
"You should stay away from me, Claire," I said finally.
I didn't wait for her response.I walked back into the inn, leaving her standing out in the cold.
Chapter16
Claire
You should stay away from me, Claire.
The words echoed through my head like a persistent drumbeat.Even as I stood there, watching Christian’s retreating form, the sting of his dismissal gnawed at me.Enough was enough.I’d given him space, offered him warmth, and yet here I was, still an outsider in his world.
I marched over to the hallway that led to the stairwell, each step fueled by frustration.The festive decorations seemed to mock me.Lights twinkled cheerfully, wreaths hung with care, and the scent of pine filled the air.But all of it felt hollow without understanding why Christian kept pushing me away.
The echo of his footsteps faded as I stood there, heart pounding, the memory of his lips on mine still fresh.He’d initiated that kiss, surprising me with a tenderness that spoke volumes he refused to say aloud.My fingers traced my lips absentmindedly, recalling the warmth that had briefly chased away the chill in my bones.
