“Where’s your photographer, this evening?” Jack asked, breaking the silence.
“His name is Simon.”
“Oh yeah. The man named after a shrub or was it the other way around? I’m not sure.”
Was that mild irritation in his tone? Jack drained his eggnog and frowned. Why was I finding his reaction to Simon so endearing?
“I think he went into town for drinks. Simon’s not the type to settle in for the evening. He’s used to city life. Bars that never close and parties that go till morning.”
“And what do you prefer?”
“Definitely this. A low-key evening with good friends.”
“What about family? I don’t think I’ve heard you mention anything about them. How come you’re working over Christmas and not spending time with them?”
I brushed crumbs from my fingers, and then traced the lines on my palm, reluctant to answer. “I don’t have any family. I grew up in foster homes and moved around a lot.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“It’s okay. It’s not something I like to talk about, but it is a part of me. I think it’s one of the reasons I like Christmas so much. That sounds weird to say because I never actually had a real Christmas like other children do. But it was the only time I felt like I could soak up some of the joy around me. Like it lived in the air. As I got older, it was something I looked forward to, and it became this thing where other people experiencing the magic of Christmas allowed me to experience it too. It’s why I took the job at—” My mouth snapped closed, and I cursed myself for almost giving away my employer's name. “The magazine. They are very festive.”
Jack’s gaze had darkened, and he shifted closer, his arm on the back of the sofa, nearly grazing my shoulder.
“Then you came here, and I tried to get you to leave and grouched at you at every turn. This must be your worst Christmas ever.”
“Is it yours?” I murmured.
Jack’s fingers skimmed the tips of my hair, and the air lodged in my throat.
“I thought it would be. It should have been. After my dad died last year, and I returned home, I was so mad at everything. It was like I was trapped in a dark hole of grief and anger, and all around me, everyone was preparing for the holidays. It didn’t make any sense.”
“I’m sorry about your dad. Losing someone is hard, especially at this time of the year.” My hand rested against Jack’s knee as if my touch could somehow ease the pain in his voice.
“The last time I saw him, we fought, and in those final months that was all we did. He was desperate to expand the farm, and the neighbors wouldn’t sell. They wanted the land to stay in their family and the only way we could get access was if I married into it.”
Jack scoffed. “It was archaic, and I felt like I was being used to further my father’s dream. I went along with it at first, but when the whole thing fell through, I was relieved. But my father was furious. People talked, saying that I was trying to destroy my father’s legacy.”
“Jack, I’m so sorry. That’s awful.”
“Don’t be. I deserved it. On Christmas Eve, the night before I left, I was so mad after one of our fights that I slept in the barn. I’d been drinking and foolishly left one of the lanterns burning. Somehow it got knocked over and the whole place went up in flames.”
“Jack…”
“The worst part was that year, the farm was running a toy drive for a local kids' charity. All the donations were being stored in the barn. Everything was wrapped and ready to be delivered on Christmas morning. But they were lost in the fire. A rumor started that I did it on purpose, so I left town.”
“That’s ridiculous! You would never—”
“It doesn’t matter, Delia. I ruined Christmas for others, kids without families of their own, just like you once experienced. I let this farm die out of anger. There is no joy to soak up here. But the worst part is for the first time in forever, I thought there might be.”
Jack’s face contorted with anguish as he set his glass down on the table. He pushed off the sofa and stalked to the speaker, silencing it with a jab of the power button. The holiday music cut out, leaving just the sound of the dwindling fire.
“Jack, please don’t go, it’s not—” I couldn’t stop him as he stalked from the room, grabbed his coat off a hook in the hall, and then slammed the front door.
My hands shook as I pressed my fingers against my temple. Learning the truth hadn’t changed how I felt. But it changed the urgency. Now more than ever, I had to complete this job. Even if it broke my heart in the process.
Because I had to face the truth: I was falling for Jack Bradley.
And the only gift I could give him was a miracle with somebody else.
