Ifound out yesterday that darts were on for Friday night, and I was nervous as hell. During the group chat, one of them finally asked who my dart partner was. Shocked it had taken so long for that question, I hesitated to answer because his name was Eli Waters and he held three titles: my co-worker’s brother, someone I thought of as a brother, and my ex’s best friend.
But it wasn’t just a casual ex. It was Theo. My history with him was complicated. We connected our senior year when we shared over half our classes. That meant we studied together, walked to our classes together, and spent lots of time together. Truth be told, I fell for him first. He didn’t treat me with the fragility most others did after the accident. He was handsome, charming, and smart, we had a lot of fun. We hooked up that year, but both knew better than to head to different colleges with a long-distance partner. I was doing a nursing program, and he was going into business to follow in his father’s footsteps. After two years of keeping in touch, visiting each other semi-frequently, and hanging out when wewere home, we decided to give it an honest go. From age twenty to twenty-two, we dated exclusively, which was a feat for long-distance college kids. We were great together. I went on vacations with his family, who seemed to like me; he got along with my family like another son, and overall, it was wonderful. When we talked about our future, it included rings and babies.
Until it didn’t.
One night, out of the blue, six weeks after we graduated from college, he broke up with me. He told me he cheated on me and that he was foolish in thinking a college relationship would make it the long haul. That he had already missed out on crazy times, and that there was too much he was going to miss out on if he had a girlfriend in his early twenties. The news blindsided me. It made little sense, because up to that point, everything seemed perfect. I was truly shattered.
A couple of weeks later, he and I were both at a bonfire party on the beach, and I found out the real reason. He never cheated on me; his parents just didn’t approve of us. I’m not sure which was worse. They told him that it was fun to mess around with whoever he wanted to in undergrad, but now that we had graduated, and they realized he was serious about proposing to me, they expressed their disapproval. I didn’t have the pedigree they were looking for. Like a fucking dog. His parents then threatened to remove him from their trust if he didn’t fall into line. When Theo was drunk and explaining it to me that night, he made it seem like he might have to marry somebody, but he would always love me. We could still be together behind closed doors because mistresses were common, but in public, he needed to be with someone who ‘complemented his social status.’ Being the side piece was a hard no for me, but I’m not denying how badly it hurt. It was acircumstance that broke us up, not something that he did or us falling out of love with each other.
At first, it was hard to keep a distance in this small town, and I was desperate for him. Add a longing, broken heart to the mix, and the following six months became a blur of me pleading for him to choose us, while he kept stringing me along. There I was, foolishly thinking he was taking the time to figure out how to make us work. Though we wouldn’t have obscene wealth, we’d have each other, and I thought that was enough. After half a year, I realized that would never be the case, and I would never be the choice, so I stopped responding to him.
Cue dart league with Eli.
Eli’s sister worked with me and convinced me to partner with him. He was a great guy; he had always been. Fun, silly, and caring—he was like a brother to me, and we knew each other well. As it turned out, we were solid dart partners, too. Sometimes, his sister would come, and occasionally, Theo did too. It wasn’t overly awkward or anything, so I thought little of it. Then, one night, Theo laid it on thick. In a moment of weakness, I went home with him. It was dumb and desperate, but I was sad and wanted something familiar. I had casually dated and been on plenty of dates, but nothing really hooked me. A small part of me thought Theo might realize what he was missing after the last tryst, but as it turned out, he was just taking what he wanted again. He tried a couple more times to pull the same shit, and I shot him down. I think after that last time, it finally clicked for me. I mean, I hadn’t been pining for him over the years or anything, but occasionally, I thought about the what-if? Not anymore; I was done. Yes, we had a great thing when we were younger, and I thought we’d last forever, but I would no longer let myself be part of that shitshow with no future. Once I felt that resolve, seeing him at darts, or anywhere else for that matter, didn’t even phase me anymore. I didn’t love it, but it didn’t bother me.
What I was concerned about was that he might be at darts, and that everyone else would be there, too. Though we had been having fun in the weeks since Cora had been back, adding Theo into the mix might make things uncomfortable. The girls hate him, and the guys tolerate him, at best.
He wasn’t the one for me, no doubt, but I admit, I had been missing and craving the connection of a relationship lately. The inside jokes, the emotional support, coming home to someone, sharing in joys, glances, comfortable dates, intimacy where the other person just knew your body. Despite staying mostly single these last few years, at my core, I was a relationship kind of person. Since Donovan and I had been flirting like we had been, it reminded me of how much I missed it.
When I told the girls who my dart partner was, they tried to call immediately. I declined and texted them I’d share the story when I went to pick them all up. Getting ready for the night, I had two goals in mind: impress Sir Donovan enough to entice him to make a move, and piss Theo off for creeping me out the other night by showing him what he lost. As such, my jeans were so tight they could have been painted on. Between solid genetics and a dedicated workout routine, I knew my ass was one of my best features, and I played it up tonight. Pairing it with a black tank top that had embroidered flowers, I showed just enough cleavage to get some attention without being scandalous. Truth be told, unless it was a turtleneck, it was hard to find shirts that didn’t show some sort of cleavage on me. I threw my favorite wedge sandals on to complete the outfit. Yes, I played darts in wedges. I put on some makeup thatmay have been a little extra for bar league but not enough to make people question who the crazy local was. Spinning to check myself out in the mirror, I approved my outfit, and headed out the door.
Psyching myself up before I got the girls, I knew they were going to be shocked by what I said. When everyone was in the car, I admitted Eli was my partner, that Theo was there occasionally, and that we had hooked up once since it began. Embarrassment wasn’t an issue because I didn’t get embarrassed with these women, but it felt like I was admitting to a not-so-great decision. I couldn’t fault their wariness; they witnessed how sad I was through everything. Catching Cora’s eyes through the rearview, she reaffirmed that everyone trusted me to make the decisions best for me, that they all loved me, and that they were all here for me. It was a very sweet gesture, and I mouthed thank you as she squeezed my shoulder in support.
We got to the bar early and were having a great time when the guys arrived. The eight of us descended to our normal comfort quickly, but I was on high alert for either Eli and Theo, or Donovan. Out of nowhere, Maeve leaned into me, “If I were not happily with Tucker, and hopefully getting engaged soon, I’d be hitting on my boss.” I giggled and turned to look where her eyes were. Sure enough, Sir Donovan Wright was walking towards us like he owned the whole damn place. Not cocky, just assured, and holy shit, did he look good doing it. There was no hint of nervousness on him this time.
He offered to get everyone a drink and settled in around the table like he had been part of our crew his whole life. It was wild. If you told me two months ago that under his indifferent facade, Donovan Wright was casual, funny, and genuinely personable, I would have called you a liar. But weeks had passed since I’d seen the professional side of him.
Within minutes, he had scooted closer to me, which was becoming our norm, and I found myself enjoying his company again. Last night, when he held my gaze when I was in his lap, I swore he was going to kiss me. So much so that I leaned over a little to make it easier for him. But after Maverick came over and interrupted, we never quite got back to kiss territory. But damn, I was curious about how tonight would play out.
Regardless, to have that man’s attention? I was the luckiest person in this town.
20
DONOVAN
Walking into the bar, I was drawn to Audra immediately, like always. She looked good in just about everything she wore, from her scrubs to that little white sundress and now these jeans. I could have bitten my fucking fist when I saw her stand up. They were so damn tight they’d be hard to peel off, but goddamn, what I would give to try. Fuck. Every red-blooded man in the bar would be zeroed in on her ass when she was throwing darts later. Did she always play darts in skin-tight jeans? She was definitely flaunting her assets, and she looked good.Did she do it for me?I wondered.
Bringing over a round, I settled in next to the bombshell that, until these last couple of weeks, I never allowed myself the chance to realize how much I wanted to get to know. My intention in coming here was not to corner her and monopolize her attention, but we fell into our own world again pretty quickly, just like we’d done the last couple of times we were together. It was so easy.
“So, Audra, are you one of those peoplewho travel with their own personal dart set?” There was a dive bar in Phoenix, one of my temporary landing spots, that had a dart league. Funnily enough, I was hooking up with a woman on that team, too. Maybe I had a type—bar dart player. I distinctly remember the people with their own dart cases because it struck me as so ridiculous. My parents would have a freaking stroke if I cared enough about them enough to even joke that my type was an amateur bar dart player. Maybe I should tell them just to watch the explosion.
She giggled, and the skin around her eyes crinkled up along with her little button nose. I couldn’t look away. “Actually, I am.” She swiped a case from the table that I hadn’t noticed. Probably because I was staring at her the whole damn time. “Just got these bad boys last week,” she said, showing them to me with a mix of silliness and pride. It was like she was showing off a prize on a game show, outlining the case with her hand.
One side of my lips turned up in a smirk. “I’m not sure if you can call them bad boys when they’re purple and pink with butterflies. I think you need skulls and fire for that.” She tilted her head and laughed brightly into the air. The sound reverberated in my brain. I’d never get sick of that sound.
“Oh my God, Donovan, those dimples!” She gushed as if I didn’t know and reached up to stroke her thumb over one of them. She must have had more to drink than I thought because she knew damn well I had them. All I’ve done around her is grin like a madman recently. Normally, I don’t let people touch me, and certainly not my face. Fuck, normally, I don’t lose my mind when someone laughs either, but something about Audra made me crazy, especially after having her in my lap last night.I’d like her to touch me again and again and again.
“I do. They don’t come out very often, but they are there.”
“That’s a lie. I see them all the time.”—She hesitated for a moment—”Well, now I do,” she clarified as her gaze bounced between my eyes, my dimples, and my lips. Her hand was still on my cheek. Did she want me to kiss her?
I was often told that I was good-looking. Before I drained the trust, I was named the most handsome bachelor in some ridiculous magazine in New York, and they compared me to a ‘long-lost Hemsworth brother with brown eyes.’ My mother hung that article up. Not any of my actual notable achievements.
“Only with you,” I flirted back, giving her an exaggerated smile that didn’t actually feel too exaggerated at that moment, pointing out both dimples with my fingers. We were in the middle of talking about other bar games and making silly bets on who would be better, when a micro expression of panic crossed her face before a cordial mask snapped into place. What happened to my crinkle-eyed flirt just now? I turned around to follow her gaze. Two additional guys had walked up to the group and were introduced as Eli and Theo. I wasn’t sure how they fit into this equation. Eli seemed to be pretty into Audra—who appeared to be clueless—but my hackles rose when Theo spoke. He was glaring at me. I glared right back because who the fuck was this guy? Something about him gave me pause. Everyone at the table seemed to ice him out of conversation, too. What was that about?
Audra and Eli, who I found out was her partner, got summoned to play, so the rest of us watched and cheered them on. They ended up winning the match, although it was also a victory for me when she started dancing around in those fucking jeans, that’s for sure. Audra was good, and even though I did a fair bit of shit-talking during our bar game conversation, she’d kick my ass. She and Eli wentoff to submit their scores, and then she strutted back to the table with popcorn for all of us. Everyone reached in like vultures. Thankfully, her dart partner and his buddy didn’t come back, but I noticed how much the two of them kept glancing in our direction.
The music was loud, and the place was just abuzz with Friday night fun. The smell of cheap beer, popcorn, and sweat filled the air. We had to talk loudly to hear each other. In the middle of a conversation lull, Maeve shouted out to the table, “Guys, I have a surprise! Donovan is fucking nuts! Completely off his rocker.” An outburst, no doubt fueled by alcohol. Everyone turned to look at me. Even after these last couple of weeks, we weren’t really at ‘diving into my past’ territory.
