CHAPTER FOUR
“SO THENthe detective says, ‘I knew you were guilty the day you walked into my office. The stench dripped from you like so much rotting garbage.’ And the killer says, ‘Then why did you take the case?’ And Tremaine answers, ‘Because I needed to find evidence that you were guilty, so I could have you arrested for murdering your brother. Basically you paid to have me get you put on death row.’”
I was hooked on his words. I had never heard of his books, but now I wanted to know more. I glanced down at my watch and realized I had been sitting with him on my porch for nearly three hours. I’d never spent that much time with any other person after the incident. And I didn’t feel freaked out by his presence. After seeing him every day, he’d somehow become a fixture, and that desperate need to keep order in my life had somehow come to include him. I wasn’t ready to let him into my home, but I found I didn’t mind talking to him so much.
“Wow,” I said, knowing that it wasn’t nearly what I meant.
“You’ve seriously never read one of my books?” He seemed amused.
“No. I… I don’t get out much.”
He chuckled. “I’m teasing you. My niche is pretty small, but if you like mysteries….”
“I do love to read,” I admitted.
“If you give me your email, I’ll send you copies. I mean, if you think they’re worth reading.”
Yes, I wanted to read them. I’d never even heard of a book that had a gay character, but to have six books in a series where the detective had a lover—which Charlie said would lead to a proposal soon—and they lived together? That sounded amazing. Most of my books were young adult stories that Mrs. Tennyson had given me. After the incident, I took those with me. I hadn’t purchased any others because they would disturb everything I had. But now I wanted to read Charlie’s work.
“I don’t have email,” I replied. “I don’t even have a computer.”
He grinned, which did strange things to my stomach. “So you really are roughing it, huh?”
No condemnation, just a simple fact. “I am. I love it out here. In the summer I can stretch out in the grass and watch the stars overhead. They shine so bright, and you can see forever in them. Then the lightning bugs come out. I get two shows for the price of one. Flashing lights dancing against a solid backdrop of stars. It’s an amazing place to live.” And until that very moment, I hadn’t realized how lonely it was. Talking with Charlie had shown me that my desire to be alone might keep my head clear, but it also caused my heart to ache.
“I can understand that,” Charlie assured me. “When I left New York to come to Fall Harbor, everyone thought I must have gone around the bend.” He tapped his finger on the arm of the swing. “To leave where my publisher was to come to a Podunk town no one had ever even heard of? Can’t say I blame them.”
There were questions I wanted to ask, but I wasn’t sure how appropriate they were. Naturally, I blurted out the most important one anyway. “So why’d you come here, of all places?”
He got a pained expression, but it vanished so quickly, I thought maybe I’d been mistaken. “I had a lover. His name was Mitch. I honestly thought we’d be together forever. Us writers, we believe in happily ever after. Apparently Mitch didn’t share my dreams. I went out on a tour one week and was scheduled to be gone for six days. They’d scheduled several readings at a popular gay bookstore in San Francisco. Me and four other authors were supposed to take part throughout the week. My agent said this would be good exposure for the series since it was doing great in sales. Plus it would give me a chance to meet some well-respected authors, maybe pick up a few tips to help hone my craft.
“Well, the shop where they were holding the reading had some pipes burst and a lot of water damage. They were unable to find a venue on such short notice, so they cancelled the event with the promise to schedule another one at a later date. I caught the red-eye flight home, expecting to have the week with Mitch.”
Charlie paused and swiped his hand across his eyes. When he continued, his voice sounded hoarse and scratchy. “Thing of it was, I’d had an engagement ring hidden in my drawer for about two months. I figured this week would be the time to do it. So all the way home, I planned how I’d ask him to share my life. I’d sweep into the house we owned, grab him, and we’d fly to Maine to get married on the steps of a beautiful B and B I found that overlooked a field of wildflowers. I had my assistant make all the arrangements.”
He stopped talking then, and I had the urge to take his hand or hug him. Something. Because I could see the pain clearly etched on his face. Of course, I didn’t move.
“You don’t have to—”
He smiled again, but it wasn’t as warm as it had been previously. “No, it’s okay. I don’t mind. Do you think I could have a little more lemonade? It’s really very good.” He gave me a sheepish grin. “I mean, if it’s not inconvenient.”
It would be his third glass, and the fact that he said how delicious it was made me feel good. Being able to share something I’d made, knowing it had been enjoyed, gave me tiny flutters in my chest.
“Sure, no problem at all.”
I picked up his glass, took it inside, and washed it. Then I pulled a clean glass from the cabinet, filled it to the brim, and walked back out onto the porch. Charlie sat back, his arm over his eyes.
“You okay?” I asked, putting the glass down on the small table next to him.
He sat up straighter and smiled. “Yeah, actually I am.” He picked up the lemonade, took a healthy swig, then put it back down. “Okay, so where was I? Oh yeah. Okay. I had everything planned out, down to the last detail. We’d have tickets waiting for us at the counter when we got to the airport, so all I needed to do was walk in, kiss Mitch, tell him to get packed, and we’d be on our way. I walked in at two thirty in the morning with this big smile on my face, put my bags down, then tiptoed to our bedroom to surprise him. The happiness I’d felt all the way home promptly fell away when I saw him, the man who told me he never bottomed, on his hands and knees, being fucked by one of our friends.”
I must have gasped because he pinned me with a stare.
“I know, right?” He huffed a breath. “I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Well, really, all I saw were my plans going down the drain.”
“What did you do?”
He gave me such a sad, tight smile, I felt I had no choice. I reached over and put my hand on top of his. We’d shaken hands before, but this time it had an intimacy to it I hadn’t expected. I won’t deny how difficult touching him was. I had to keep reminding myself it wasn’t wrong to comfort a friend, which led to me wondering when I’d started thinking of Charlie as a friend. But I didn’t break contact with him, which made me proud.
