There could be no doubt that he was offering me a chance to say no, to say I had made a mistake. The urge to accept it could have easily overwhelmed me, but I swallowed it down. If I ever wanted to have a chance at a normal life, or at least some semblance of one, I had to work hard to show that I couldbenormal.
“Yes, I want you to stay with me. I have the bed made up for you, and….”
Charlie waited patiently while I got my thoughts together. Now that this had become real, I didn’t know where to start.
“Is there anything you don’t eat?”
He patted his flat stomach. “My mom likes to say I could be a human garbage disposal. Anything and everything.”
That would make my life a lot easier. Having limited supplies on hand, I’d have to improvise some meals until the store could make a delivery. Of course, that would mean getting an order in and having Charlie see my routine. Was I really ready for that?
“Charlie?”
“Hmm?”
Not able to look at him, I turned away and began to pace. I couldn’t decide if I should sit down or run away. My cheeks were already red-hot. “There won’t be a good time to discuss this, and it probably should be said before you decide this is the place you want to be.”
He turned and leveled his gaze at me. “Okay. Tell me what’s on your mind.”
I figured this would be easier if I was sitting, so I took a seat and looked out at the copse of trees that had been almost stripped bare. Funny how this conversation made me feel the same way. “Thirteen years ago….” I paused and tried to come up with a better way to say it, but nothing came to me beyond the bald truth. “Thirteen years ago,” I repeated, “a teacher tried to… to….” My throat seized up, and the words wouldn’t come.
“Matt? Are you okay?” Charlie reached over and put his hand atop mine. “Tried to what?”
I swallowed hard, and it hurt all the way down. A quick breath, followed by my confession. “He tried to rape me,” I whispered.
