I took a deep breath, and she must have heard the hesitation.
“Honey, it’s fine if you’re not ready. He’ll be happy to wait.”
Well, damn. Now I knew where Charlie got his manners.
“I’d love to say hello,” I lied. Really, there had been so many changes in the past week, I’d spent a lot of time touching my treasures. Charlie knew that during those times, it was best not to talk to me, at least until I found my center again. When he reached out and took my hand, my gaze met his.
“I love you,” he mouthed.
“Hello!” a voice boomed over the phone. “Matt, right?”
“Yes, sir,” I replied, cringing at the sound of his voice.
Charlie sighed and took the phone from my hand. “Dad. Too loud. Try about fifty decibels lower. He’s not deaf.”
Whatever his father was saying had Charlie grinning like a loon.
“More flies with honey is all I’m saying. Now, do you want to try again?” He turned his gaze to me, and I nodded. He smiled, and it helped calm the butterflies. “Okay, here you go.”
“Hi, is this Matt?” he asked, his voice much softer than before.
“Yes, sir.”
“Sorry. I get excited and tend to get loud. I don’t want you to be afraid of me. I promise I don’t bite.”
“I’m not sure that’s true” came a voice in the background.
“Shut up, Gail,” he snapped, but I could hear the affection in his voice. “I am sorry. It’s an honor to get to talk to you. Charlie hasn’t stopped singing your praises. If it’s to be believed, you could be the Second Coming.”
My stomach flipped once more. I knew Charlie said he loved me, but to hear that he told his parents? God, that just about made everything perfect. And told me what I needed to do.
I didn’t speak long with his parents. The more we talked, the more nervous I got. Charlie must have seen it, because he held out a hand to me, and I gave him the phone, then went around the room, grounding myself. After he hung up, he came up behind me and pulled me toward the couch. I sat down beside him, and he tucked me in to his side.
“They adore you,” he whispered. “Mom thinks you’re so sweet. Dad likes the fact that you’re respectful. He didn’t get much of that from Mitch, who thought it was cool to call him by his first name without even being asked to.”
“I like them too,” I said. “Your mom sounds wonderful. I really want….”
“Want what, baby?” he asked softly. “Tell me what you want.”
“I want to go back to therapy.” I was now more certain of this than I had ever been. Still, it scared me. What if they couldn’t help me? What if it all got to be too much? Then I looked at Charlie and saw hope in his expression. “I never really thought about what I was missing out on until you came into my life. It’s been me and these four walls for over a decade. I want to see what else is out there. I want to be able to stand up and hold out my hand to your parents and introduce myself properly. I want to be worthy of the words you said to your parents.”
“You don’t have to be anything other than Matt. People will like you and accept you for who you are, or they won’t. Either way, the onus is on them. You should never have to change to satisfy anyone. I certainly hope you don’t think I want you to be a different person for me.”
“No,” I replied. “I want to be a different person for me.”
He kissed me on the head. “Then we’ll do it. Together.”
