“I’m not familiar with what you’re describing. What do you mean ‘tie him down’?” he asks, struggling to focus through the growing lust between them.
“He’s strapped to a bed with hand and ankle cuffs, and we administer the necessary drugs.”
Which raises the obvious question. How does he usually come? Graham doesn’t release with Dominants or else Colton wouldn’t be here. The toxins that cause the drop have to be expressed, so Colton would assume he’d jerk off, but if he’s tied up, then that isn’t happening either.
“I guess I don’t quite get the mechanics here. Do you let him go so he can touch himself or what? Graham, can she tell me?” he asks.
Graham nods.
“Director Fein has cleared you to know his medical history. I know I was skeptical before, but I am impressed. He’s much calmer than usual. But his levels aren’t good. They’re getting progressively worse after each mission. His ability to expel and release toxins is diminishing, which is why he now gets a stimulant injection. The stimulant increases how much he expels when he releases.”
Colton puts his hands on Graham’s back, as if that might protect him. This is all so sadly dysfunctional he’s having trouble wrapping his brain around it. “But he’s hard and leaking now. I can see it. Stimulating him seems almost cruel.”
She nods, agreeing with him. “He doesn’t want us touching him, and he’s against manual or self-release when he’s in drop.He has difficulty ejaculating. The drug means he will ejaculate, because it increases arousal. Then we can get him stabilized enough to even him out with medication over the next several days.”
“You give him so much of a drug he comes untouched?” Colton’s just checking. ‘Cause it sounds like some bizarre form of torture. “Is that… good?”
Graham tenses and Colton presses his cheek against the side of Graham’s head, comforting him.
“No, not really. It’s quite painful, and it seems to cause him suffering. But it’s what he wants and we have to be mindful of that.”
He wants to tell her it isn’t necessary to give Graham a stimulant because he’s very fucking sure he can make Graham come so hard the man passes out. But now that he knows how resistant Graham is to Dominants and even orgasms, he’s worried he’d be taking advantage of him when he’s vulnerable. If he wasn’t dropping and compromised, would he be sitting here with Colton, close to begging for his touch?
No, of course not! Graham doesn’t and seems not to have ever wanted a Dominant to help him.
Which is bizarre. Every submissive Colton knows would do anything to avoid a crash and the ensuing days of feeling low, miserable, and lost. Of feeling run-down and aching as their bodies slowly get rid of the toxins. It’s poison. Not releasing sufficiently isn’t just bad for one’s health, it feels awful, too.
But Graham isn’t everyone else.
Clearly, he doesn’t make the usual decisions a man with a designation would, and his past experiences have influenced that greatly. Colton isn’t going to be the one to make this worse.
“We need to get him to the infirmary. He has a special room with restraints so he doesn’t hurt himself,” she says.
It sounds horrible. Torture. Especially for someone so afraid of needles. Is this why Graham is so fearful?
“However,” she says, voice careful. “With such a strong Dominant nearby and with how he’s responded to you so far, I think the release he achieves with the stimulant might be greatly improved.”
“What can I do?” Colton asks, because he’ll do whatever they want. This is about Graham. “I’m here and he’s agreeable to me.”
“We can try to let him stay here with you and see if he releases?”
“Good. Let’s do that.”
“But he’s lashed out before, so we would need him to be restrained. He might hurt you.”
Graham exhales sharply against him.
“I don’t think he will.”
“I don’t either. Like I said, this is remarkable.”
“Graham, what do you want to do?” His voice is rough with emotion, just imagining this poor submissive alone, releasing against his will, strapped down with no one to help him. It’s the most dysfunctional thing he’s ever heard.
He mumbles into Colton’s neck. “I… I want to stay with you. Right here. Want you to help me.”
“Good. I have his restraints,” the doctor says, pleased. “I don’t like him in there. Human contact, touch, this would all be a lot healthier for him.”
“Graham, I’ll stay here with you. I’m honored, but are you sure you want to be restrained?”
