Christian sat forward on the chair; hands gently clasped together. She hated him for the earnest expression on his face. He was serious about his request. “I promise to show you as much affection as you feel necessary while we are in public. That will include standing close to you. Dancing. And of course, sharing sweet terms of endearment, such as ‘I love you.’”
Erika flinched. She wasn’t certain she could hear them and not believe them to be true. She forced a tight smile to her lips, all the while praying Christian would tell her it was all some wicked jest he had created. They would both laugh it off and never speak of a fake betrothal ever again.
When he didn’t offer up a release, Erika grasped for the last straw of hope. This insanity had to end, and there was one person who she could count on to stop it all. Her father. “I don’t think Magnus will agree to this scheme. He is not one to put me in harm’s way.”
“Why would you be in any danger? This is merely a fake engagement,” he replied.
Erika halted her angry pacing as the door opened and her father poked his head inside. She made a beeline for him.
Oh, thank god. Sanity will prevail. There is no way Pappa would agree to such an arrangement.
“How are things going, Your Highness?”
Christian shook his head. “Not good. She doesn’t think it a sensible idea.”
Erika’s eyes grew wide. Her fatherknewabout Christian’s plan. Not only that, but he was in favor of it. Had the world gone mad? “But I don’t understand. What happened to your grand plans to marry me off to Prince Gustav?”
Count Jansson came to his daughter and took her gently by the hand. The calm calculated look on his face immediately set her ill at ease. “Plans change. Besides, I am sure Prince Stefan will agree that our country’s needs come first. He will see the merit of the temporary arrangement. With any luck, Christian will be able to make headway with the Prince Regent’s inner circle within a matter of weeks, and thereby have a positive impact on the trade agreement negotiations. After we secure the agreement, we can discuss your future.”
A chill of dread gripped her. If she went through with the scheme, she was in all likelihood agreeing to be condemned to either playing the jilt, or worse still—being jilted. Whatever tentative status she now held within the diplomatic community and thetonwould forever be destroyed.
The bigger picture finally became clear in her mind. She would be betrothed to Christian and when the fake engagement eventually ended, which it probably would, the only option left for her would be to return to Sweden. Her self-sacrifice would be rewarded with being put on a boat and sailing away to a life of ignominy. The one ray of hope in all this was that Gustav wouldn’t want his brother’s secondhand fiancée.
Securing a major trade deal for her country was a glittering prize, worthy of martyrdom in the eyes of many. But not her. She needed to think about this carefully and the impact it would have on her future. Her life was the one which would be irrevocably changed if she agreed to the plan. “I want time to consider my response. It is not a mere trifle of a thing which you ask. Could you grant me the rest of the day? I promise you will have your answer by supper.”
Her father kissed her tenderly on the forehead. He leaned back and held her at arm’s length, reassurance written all over his face. “Of course. Take all the time you need to get used to the idea. You are a loyal and proud daughter of Sweden. I know you will do what is right.”
Erika left the room, not giving Christian a second glance. She didn’t want to look at him, to see those bright blue eyes silently pleading with her.
She was angry with him, and also with herself. He had charmed his way into her confidence, leading her to believe he was her friend. Someone she could trust.
Was this your plan all along? Lull me into a false sense of security, while all the time you were baiting a trap?
Nausea threatened. Her stomach roiled as she headed toward the narrow staircase which led to the third floor of the house.
Believing that Christian and her father were using her as a pawn in their game was bad enough. Wondering how she was going to be able to pretend to love him, when in fact she did, had her mind in a whirl.
One thing was certain, if she agreed to the plan, being engaged would be sheer torture for her. She dared not think what her heart would do the first time Christian professed his love for her in public. A declaration of affection that would be a lie.
Tears pricked her eyes as she closed the door of her bedroom. The walls of the tiny, cramped space seemed to be closing in on her.
Breathe. Slowly in and out.
Her harried mind wouldn’t settle. She was here to think things through logically and clearly. What she really wanted to do was open the window and scream to the street; not caring who saw or heard her.
If only she hadn’t been raised around the royal court, had it instilled deep within her that duty was above all else. Her country. Her king. These were her purpose in life, and that flowed through her veins.
Her father had given her time to consider her response. The choice was hers.
“And if you believe that, you are a fool,” she muttered.
Could she say no to Christian? Leave him to find his own way through the murky waters of the English capital on his own? Fail her father?
Erika slumped onto her bed. Freya stirred from sleep in the corner and stretched her hind legs. She ambled over to where her mistress sat, her tail wagging in happy greeting.
“Hello, my beautiful girl. What am I to do? Refuse my duty in order to save myself?”
Freya nuzzled against her leg and Erika patted the dog’s head. She would spend the next few hours in here considering her response, making it appear that she at least had some say in the outcome. But as she settled to scratch the soft fur behind Freya’s ear, Erika already knew the answer.
