His fingers brushed against mine as if he were asking permission. I obliged, linking our hands. His grip was firm, strong, letting me know I could depend on him. As we neared the entrance, the crowd thickened. A sense of nervous pride filled me, and I held on to him tighter. I knew he’d take care of me if my anxiety flared.
The festival ended up taking place at a pumpkin farm. The giant sign read “Pumpkin Adventure.” Excitement raced through me. I’d never been to a pumpkin farm but had always wanted to go.
“You brought me to a pumpkin farm?” I muttered. He outdid himself every time.
“We took my niece here for Halloween one year,” he said as we got in line. “She loved it. I’ve never been to the fall festival, though. I thought it would be cool to check it out together. Their apple cider is to die for.”
“I love it already,” I said and beamed up at a left-over Halloween decoration of a ghost, white tendrils of cloth blowing in the wind.
I almost told him that I hadn’t gotten to do many kid-things when I was young, so this meant a lot to me. I wanted to let him in badly, but how did I say the words? How did you tell someone that you liked–loved?–about all the bad things thathad happened to you? That my mother had looked the other way when her new boyfriend smacked me around a little too roughly? That I lived in constant fear I might not eat because my mother was in some dirty place getting high? Was it even possible to put such things into words?
“Hey, you okay?” He prompted, tugging my hand gently.
I smiled at him. “Yeah. I’m just really happy to be here.”
“Let’s get in there, then.” I watched as he paid for our tickets, wishing I could contribute something, but he didn’t seem to mind.
When we were through the entrance, he took my hand again, as if he were proud to be with me. I fell against him, needing his support. All the people made me nervous, and the last time I’d attended any sort of festival, it hadn’t ended well. We got a cup of hot apple cider first and found a quiet corner to drink it. The place was fairly packed, but Gabriel ended up on a haystack with me on his lap. I was thankful to be thin.
“You are right,” I said with a hum. “This is delicious. And perfect for a chilly day like today.”
He pulled me closer. “Are you cold?”
“A little.” I rested my head against his shoulder and let the warmth of the cup seep into my fingers. “But I have you.”
He purred. “Yes, you do.”
“Am I squishing you?” I asked, but stayed right where I was.
He cuddled me closer. “No.”
We finished our cider, the warm liquid settling well in my belly and the heat chased away the chill. “I hear goats. Is there a petting zoo?”
“Yeah, there is one on the grounds somewhere.”
I gasped. “We have to go.”
We found the petting zoo. It was a large tent with several different animals inside. We fed slices of carrots to a varietyof goats, sheep, llamas, and various breeds of cattle. It was interesting seeing all the different species. The festival did end up having several games and I beat him at every one, much to his delight.
As I handed him a fuzzy pink teddy bear, he said, “One day, just you wait. One day I will win a game against you.”
“I don’t know. I’m pretty far ahead percentage wise,” I teased as he accepted the bear. “I doubt you will be able to catch up.”
“I just have to find a game I can turn to my advantage.”
I gaped at him. “You’re just going to openly admit to trying to cheat?”
“Pretty much, yeah.”
“You are terrible.”
As the afternoon turned into evening and the sun started to sink into the west, we found a bench under a giant tent. A country-blues band was playing, and the patio lights overhead filled the place with pure joy.
He left me in a corner, under a heat lamp to get us some food. As I waited for him to return, I cuddled the teddy bear close and watched the people dancing in the center. I’d always felt like I was on the outside of society, looking in with longing like some lonely, desperate monster that was misunderstood. I wished I could be more like the people dancing in front of the band, laughing, and moving to the music. But I wasn’t. Still, I enjoyed watching the normal people having fun and rested my head on top of the cuddly bear.
“I’ve lost my mind!” Gabriel shouted over the noise and sat next to me. His hands were loaded with boxes. “I’m going to regret this.”
As he opened the container, a variety of pastries was revealed–apple pie, pecan pie, apple tarts, pumpkin pie, andapple-cider donuts. The only healthy thing he’d chosen was a bottle of chilled water.
