“Yeah, well, none of us really invited you up there,” he retorts. “You don’t always have to have the spotlight, Mae. It’s okay to share.”
Dumbfounded, I choke back a gasp. I put it all together at that moment. Last night’s date had bothered him, and today’s events have bothered him even more.
Cooling down the slightest bit, I answer with a bit of a whisper, “You invited me to come today. I thought I was helping.”
I’m aware of how timid I sound. I’m aware that he’s flinched at my answer. He’s hurt me, though, and I can’t hide it, not even from him. When I was with Trenton, all I ever felt was anger when we fought. There is no anger with Wyatt now that the problem has come to light, only remorse and a little disappointment.
Wyatt’s fingers curl around the wheel tighter again, a sign of that same frustration from earlier. I do my best to prepare for another onslaught, but what comes instead is an explanation.
“I’ve just been so stressed about the game.” The easy realization slaps me across the face, and I quickly reach out and rest a hand on his arm. He eases it off the wheel and onto the center console, where I can reach him better. Running gentle fingers back and forth, he continues. “I’ve just had a few shitty practices in a row, and I’m really struggling to keep my head straight.”
“It’s a lot of pressure,” I say, nodding my head.
He laughs, “Not to you, though. That’s what I’m saying. Nothing gets to you.”
“Things get to me,” I answer, thinking back to Nashville. “I promise.”
“Maybe, but you don’t show it. I’ve never once seen you crack under pressure.” He swallows hard, and I can’t tell if he’s about to cry or if his throat is just dry.
“You haven’t cracked either, Wyatt,” I remind him, desperately wanting him to see himself as I do.
“I just-” A deep breath follows. “I love you, but I have to focus. I think maybe it would be good if we took a break from seeing each other until I can figure myself out.”
Another blindside. I pull my hand back like it’s been scalded and move my fingers to my mouth. This is completely out of the blue. “You- You want a break from me?”
“Not from you. Never from you. Just from the constant firestorm,” he says, reaching over and snatching my hand away from my teeth. He brings my knuckles up to his lips and briefly lays a kiss. Does he not realize that the constant firestorm and I are a package deal? “This game is everything. It’s all I’ve ever wanted since I was five and watched the 2000 Championship with my dad.”
“I don’t want to get in the way of that.”
“I know,” he says softly. “And I love you for that.” There’s a brief pause before he continues. “Mae, you deal with the pressure of a constant spotlight all the time; you have since you were a teenager. This is all new to me. I’ve been under the watchful eye of sports media since I was in college, but this is something so much bigger. I’m still getting used to it. I will find a way to live with it as long as I can keep you.”
“I understand,” I say through choked-back tears. He knows this is a part of me; he’s overwhelmed by it but he’s still willing to try. I squeeze my eyes shut as I think of the future. I will always be looking for ways to keep myself in the eyes of the public and as long as I do that, a firestorm of cameras and gossip will follow. I’m getting ready to bring this up when he takes my breath away.
“I’ll come around to it,” he says again with more reinforcement. “You are worth everything. I just need to get through these next few weeks.”
“I understand,” I say again, mostly because I feel the need to. What about my needs? What about what I need to make it through the next few minutes?
As we come to the intersection that will take us to the airport, a large SUV pulls up next to us. Hoping to see Dalton, I glance over and realize it’s a mistake almost immediately. A camera lens pops out from the window, and a man leans out into the road, snapping pictures inches from my face. Literally the worst timing.
Without warning, Wyatt speeds through the empty road on a red light into the safety of private property. My life is crazy and it always will be. Wyatt speeding through the intersection safely proves to me that he is serious about what he said. He will always try to protect me from the worst of it, despite his feelings.
When we park, Wyatt returns to his gentlemanly ways. He hops out and opens the door for me. We share a hug, one thatfeels warm and safe. A less than passionate kiss follows, and I almost fall apart. I turn to leave, but he holds on to my hands to keep me facing him.
“I meant what I said earlier. You are worth every moment of uncertainty we’ve endured and every single second of crazy change we have gone through and will go through. This is worth it to me.”
“And you’re worth the wait,” I answer, more tears lining my eyes. He wipes them away and pulls me back in for a hug.
“I love you,” he whispers.
“I love you, too,” I whisper back. There are no apologies; there’s no need for that right now. The hug serves well enough.
Chapter 33
Wyatt
I REGRET THE WAY I left things with Mae last week, and I’ve told her that every day since we last saw each other. I’d been so overwhelmed with practices and expectations that I wrongfully took it out on her and our relationship. Had the things she’d done bothered me? In a way, yes. I envy the way she remains so cool under pressure and the way that people gravitate to her when they’re looking to elevate themselves. At the same time, I love her for how strong she is and how she can shoulder any situation and deal with it.
It’s true that our time apart has been good for me. I miss her like hell, but it’s given me the space I need to focus. Practices have been going better, and the paparazzi on my street have decreased. We’ve managed to speak a few times, but I think we’re both waiting to see each other in person to really say what’s on our minds.
