“Oh,” I answer without thinking about it. “I mean, you’re, uh, entitled to do that.” She looks ashamed, but when her hand rests on the bare skin of my arm, I realize that she’s calling him for reasons that are not threatening to me or anything we have going.
She glances behind her at the door. “I just, I think I finally understand why he left, and he deserves an apology.”
I don’t question her logic or her need for doing it right in this second when we have a media nightmare on our hands. Seeing someone you love escape death can do funny things to you. Wanting to do nothing more than be there for her, I cover her hand with mine and lean forward to kiss her jaw. “Take as much time as you need.”
The smallest of smiles replaces her nervous look, and she slowly peels herself away from me. I find myself watching her, even as she extends her distance down the long hallway and even after the large fireproof door to the waiting room closes.
Chapter 39
Raleigh
THERE WAS NO POINT in being nervous about telling Dalton what I was fleeing to do. I could tell he was a little on edge at the beginning, but as we looked at each other, that connection we’ve had since we met thrummed with understanding. He let me go with a kiss on the jaw that took my breath away and a reassurance that he would be there for me when I was ready.
The urge to call Grant was strange and sudden. It came when Mae was talking about the things that Trenton had said to her over the phone right before the crash. Horrible things that officially ended any adoration she had left for the man. Drunk or not, Trenton needs serious help.
As Mae let her eyes grow heavy, she began to drift off and I began thinking about Dalton and then Grant. Neither man had ever yelled such horrible things at me, neither had yelled period. I don’t believe I’ve given Dalton a reason to, and I doubt he would treat me in such a way even if I gave him every chance.Grant and I, on the other hand, were young when we were together. I certainly put him through a fair share of situations where I was cruel and undeserving of his kindness.
As long as I’ve searched for an apology from Grant, I’ve never once thought about apologizing to him for what Nashville put him through, for what I put him through.
“Raleigh?” A groggy Grant answers from the other end of the line. “What time is it?” I hear the sheets shuffle and then it sounds like the opening of the door. “Are you alright?”
“I’m fine,” I say, a little too shaky to be believable. “Listen, I don’t want to keep you long. There is just something that I want to say. You don’t have to say anything back.”
There’s a brief silence. And then an unsure answer, “Okay.”
Suddenly, I have no idea how to word any of what I planned. “I… I just wanted to say that I think I finally understand why you decided to leave, and I regret not giving you the environment you needed to convey that to me. I apologize for not being the partner you deserved.”
“Raleigh, where is this coming from—”
“I’m not finished,” I scold, needing to get everything out in the open. “There’s been an accident this morning, everyone is okay, but I just got to thinking abouthowwe’re forced to live in this town, always running from one thing to the next, always at a high energy level. There’s rarely a time to slow down unless you force yourself to, and most of the time, you miss out on something integral if you do. This town can suck the life out of you. I think sometimes it’s killing me and I’m finally coming to understand that. I finally understand how the city may have affected you.”
“It’s not killing you, Raleigh. It was suffocating me, but not you. You were always tougher than me. Always. I hope you’re not reaching out to tell me that you’re thinking about quitting.”
“Isn’t that always what you wanted me to do?” I ask in a breathless whisper.
“At one point in my life, I did. And Raleigh, that was selfish of me. I saw you flourish in a place that squashes that type of energy. I watched you after I left, continue to chase your dreams and then make new ones out of the ones that I had a hand in crushing. I’ve never apologized for that, but Raleigh, I am so sorry for my part in threatening your career.”
“You didn’t—”
“I did.” He lets out a long stressful breath before continuing. “Raleigh, you were made to do this. You were always meant to do this without me. Always meant to work for Mae, and always meant to find Dalton. If anything had happened differently in the years we were together, nothing that you’ve accomplished would have happened.”
Damn him and his outlook on life.
“Raleigh?”
“Yeah.”
“I think you need to hang up the phone and go find Dalton. Whatever fears you are experiencing, whatever heartbreak, or thoughts of ‘what ifs’… He’s there for you, you just need to let him in.”
“You’re right,” I say simply, already moving to disconnect my phone from the charging cord.
“Goodbye, Raleigh.”
“Goodbye, Grant. I’ll see you at the wedding.”
He laughs before hanging up.
With my spirits lifted, I raise to my feet and find my way back to the waiting room and then to the door leading to Mae’s hallway.
