“Don’t tempt me,” he says, picking up a particularly perfect strawberry and holding it out. “I was thinking we’d start with these and work our way up to the more… interactive foods.”
ChapterTwenty-One
LOG TWENTY-ONE – COLLECTIVE DELUSION: MULTIPLE STAFF MEMBERS REPORTED HEARING A HEARTBEAT IN THE WALLS. THE SUBJECT SMILED, SAYING, “IT’S NOT THE WALLS.”
“There’ssomething I need to tell you, and I don’t want you to get upset,” Malachi says.
I tip my head back to look up at him. We finished eating our romantic feast, and now he’s leaning back against the tree. I’m nestled against his chest, having taken off my jacket and draped it over our legs like a makeshift blanket, though the temperature down here is perfectly comfortable.
“Me? Upset? Never,” I say, narrowing my eyes at him and wondering what this could possibly be about.
“I need to leave for a day or two to go back to my father’s compound and check on the rest of Solace. I can’t tell my aunt our plans for the mission, but I should tell someone in case…”
“In case we all die down there and no one knows what happened to us,” I finish for him, and his lips press into a grim line.
“Rain might be a pain in my ass, but I think I can trust her. We practically started Solace together and have been through countless missions.” He runs his fingers through my hair absently. “I need her to know in case everything goes sideways.”
I don’t like the idea of him leaving, but I also don’t have any desire to go back to that place. “So you’re going to tell Rain our plans, and that’s it?”
I roll onto my side, resting my head on his chest where I can hear his heartbeat steady and strong. “Yeah, I need to talk to her about it in person and set some things in order. While I’m gone, you can keep training. We’ll leave in under a week unless you change your mind.”
The thought is tempting, to run away together, start a new life, and pretend there aren’t terrible things happening in this broken world. But what kind of person would I be if I did something like that when I’m in a position to make a real difference?
It’s funny how love makes you want to be selfish and selfless at the same time. Part of me wants to grab him and never let go, to find some remote corner of the world where we can just exist together without caring about anyone else’s suffering. But the bigger part of me knows I’d hate myself for it. I’ve spent my whole life being powerless—controlled, owned, used. Now that I finally have the ability to fight back, to protect other people from what I went through, how could I walk away?
Maybe growing up is realizing love doesn’t mean hiding from the world together. It means being brave enough to face it side by side, even when staying safe would be so much easier. Even when you’re terrified of losing everything you’ve finally found.
“There’s no way I’m changing my mind,” I say, letting out a long sigh.
“What is it?” he asks, taking a strand of my hair and wrapping it around his finger.
“I keep thinking we’re going to get down there and realize we’re in over our heads. That I’ve dragged us straight into a shitstorm we can’t crawl out of and there won’t be anyone tosave us.” The words tumble out, letting my insecurities finally reach the surface.
Malachi cups my jaw, tipping my chin up to look at him. “We don’t need saving, Katja. We are the storm.”
He says it with such confidence that I wish I could steal a bit of it from him.
“Damn right, they won’t know what hit them,” I say, flexing my arm to show him my muscles. He chuckles, the sound rumbling through his chest.
“Keep training with the team while I’m gone and get comfortable using the mask so we can all have Avidian on the mission. Bash has made enough for everyone now.”
I make a mental note to find Bash tomorrow and ask him about it. I nod, resting my head back on his chest, feeling slightly more settled by his unwavering certainty.
“So when do you plan on leaving?” I ask, tugging his T-shirt up a bit so I can run my hand across his warm skin and the taut muscles of his stomach.
“Tonight,” he says.
“What? Is that why you brought me down here, to soften the blow? It’s late. When exactly were you planning on telling me?” I scowl, sitting up on my knees to glare at him properly.
“I’m telling you now, and I don’t have to meet the pilot for three more hours. You have me all to yourself until then.” He gives me that adorable, infuriating smirk that makes me want to hit him and melt all at the same time.
“I can’t believe you’re leaving tonight. I wanted to spend more time alone with you before the mission.” I cross my arms, knowing it’s ridiculous to pout over this, but I can’t help it.
“That’s exactly why I’m leaving tonight after you go to sleep. The sooner I get going, the sooner I get back to you,” he says, sitting up and pulling me closer. “Besides, we still have three hours. That’s plenty of time for me to make it up to you.”
“Oh yeah? What do you have in mind? Going to show me some of those tricks you learned from your romance novels?” I pull my bottom lip between my teeth, anticipation already building.
“Oh, my little demon, the books haven’t been written yet for what I want to do to you.” His voice dips into a more dangerous tone.
