“What exactly did you hate about the scripts?” Sean asked, after a pause.
“Sean—”
“Please, I won’t cry again, I promise. I’m just curious.” He held up his hands as though surrendering. She shook her head, because again, this felt like a conversation she couldn’t win. A group of tourists, chatting in Italian, walked toward them on the pavement and she moved aside to let them pass. Once they had the walkway to themselves again, she said, “Okay, so withProbe and Prejudice, you had all the army-versus-alien stuff, which was great, but then you had this love story going on between the army chief and the tribal warlord. And even though it was an action film, the love story was central to the whole thing—I mean, your title is riffing off a love story. They went to war withthe aliens so they could be together ‘in this life or the next.’ But I just didn’t believe they loved each other.”
“Why?” he asked, and he looked curious rather than offended.
“They didn’t know each other; we were just supposed to assume they loved each other because they were both hot. You’re a romantic, Sean! It needed some romance. You could have shown her meeting the warlord’s family, falling in love with his way of life, his passion for weaving. She could have painstakingly mended the loom the aliens broke, or he could have bought back the ring she had to sell—”
“Okay, so where were you in the script meeting?” he asked, smiling now.
“Did you haveanywomen in the script meeting?”
“No,” he said sheepishly, and they shared a real smile, the kind they used to share. He linked his arm in hers. “I missed this.”
“Me too.”
“Of course she should have mended the loom,” he said, flinging his free hand in the air. “Why didn’t I think of that?”
“Because you probably had a thousand other things to think about.”
He leaned his head on her shoulder, and she felt a bubble of joy, because this—talking over story, lamenting how craft could fall so far short of your original idea, figuring out how to bring it one step closer to the work it could be—was what she’d missed. And seeing him this weekend, she finally knew she’d been right back then. They were never supposed to date, they were supposed to be somethingrarer: creatively in sync.
“You know, I don’t know where you get this idea that I’m aromantic,” Sean said, as they carried on walking, past Keble and the science library. “Gracie always says I lack imagination in that department.”
“Being romantic is just being thoughtful, and you could be incredibly thoughtful. I bet you’re a great boyfriend. Honestly, the number of times I kicked myself for not wanting to see you naked…No offense.”
He laughed. “You’re talking about the Imp, aren’t you?” he asked, shaking his head.
“Yes. Maybe that’s whatProbe and Prejudiceneeded—a little more Imp, a little less disemboweling,” she said, but now he stopped them and turned to her with a serious expression.
“Chloe. How many times do I have to tell you, I was never the Imp,” Sean said.
“Sure,” she said, turning to look at him through narrowed eyes.
“I’m sorry I let you believe it was me.” He looked guilty. “It was selfish of me.”
“Who was it, then?”
“Chloe, come on.Surelyyou know?” He gave her a hard, searching look.
“Akiko?” she asked. Was it Akiko all along? No, she wouldn’t have been able to keep that quiet for ten years. Sean laughed.
“John?” she asked, and some chord thrummed inside her. It was John. She wanted it to be John.
“I can’t confirm or deny anything. It’s not my place to say. So, will you take me down from this thoughtfulness pedestal now?” Sean asked. Then he put an arm around her, pulled her into a brotherly hug, and rubbed a fist gently against the top of her head. “Your hair looks better curly like this, it hides your massive ears.”
“Oh shut up,” she said, laughing. But now she picked up her pace, because she wanted to get to the picnic, she wanted to see John. It was him, it had to be. Something clicked, a faceless figure in a dream coming into focus. To their left Parks Road opened out to a huge expanse of green.
“Why are you walking so fast?” he asked.
“No reason,” she said, slowing slightly.
“So tell me more about Rob. Is it serious?” he asked.
She shrugged; she didn’t want to lie to him. “He’s a good fit for me right now,” she said. “He’s a great guy.”
“ ‘A good fit’? That doesn’t sound like the romantic I used to know.”
