“Enter.”
Avlyn’sbeautiful face looked around the door to find me on the bed.
“Oh,Ididn’t realize…”
“It’salright,Commander.Iwasn’t ready for bed, anyway.”Ithrew back the sheets and sat on the end of the bed as they came in, shutting the door behind them.
“Ijust wanted to see how you were getting on.Wehave quite a trek ahead of us tomorrow.”
“Theprincess did myhair, so you can sayI’mvery prepared.”
Theychuckled. “That’sgood to hear.Ididn’t need to worry about you at all then.”Theyflashed their teeth at me, andIlooked away. “OrmaybeIshould.Isthere anything else you need,Pallas?”
“NothingIdeserve,Commander.”
Ifelt their fingers trace under my chin, andIlifted my eyes to meet theirs.
“Howlong are you going to go on punishing yourself?”Avlynasked.
“Howlong does it take to earn redemption?”
“Dunno.”Thatwas all they said.
“Dunno?!Isthat all you have?”
“I’venever tried to be redeemed before.”Theyshrugged their shoulders. “I’vedone terrible things in my life, too,Pallas.Iknow there are those out there who likely wish for my death; pray for it.Icould try to justify it, say it was for survival or for some greater good.Butthat feels cheap likeI’msweeping their pain away.So,Idon’t try to redeem it;Ilet it sit with me and shoulder all the pain thatIcan.”
“Doesn’tthat eat away at you?”
“Somedays, yes.Sometimesit’s almost too much.”
“So, how do you go on?”
Tomy surprise, a smile spread across their lips. “Iuse it.Allthat weightIcarry is a reminder of what it costs to have thoseIcare for safe.Inever forget what a blessing it is to have my soldiers, my king, or my friends with me.Everythingin this life has a price, and ifIam to be the one who bears it for them, thenIwill.”
Theylooked at me with those deep eyes, and their smile grew into something lascivious. “AndImust be doing something right because the gods have blessed me with a beautiful and erudite woman waiting for me in bed.”
Ifelt the color rise on my cheeks and couldn’t let them win, not yet. “Erudite?Someone’sbeen studying.”
“Anythingto impress you.”Theyleaned in, andIfelt their hand slide up my thigh, sending bolts of pleasure straight between my legs, and my stomach flipped.
“I’vebeen trying to impress you ever since you kissed me.Ihaven’t been able to stop thinking about it.”Theirother hand came up and gently wrapped around the back of my neck, andIcouldn’t have escaped even ifIwanted to.Ididn’t want to.Iwanted nothing more than the feeling of them on me right now.
“I’mnot good,Avlyn.Youhave to know that.”
“Pallas, right now,Ireally don’t fucking care.”Theyclosed that final distance, crashing their lips into mine.Asoft moan escaped me, andIthrew my arms around their neck, pulling them down on top of me as we crashed into the bed.
Avlynwasn’t small, and the feeling of their entire weight pressing into me was divine.
Iwrapped my hand around the back of their neck, careful not to snag any braids with my nails, asItwisted their head slightly soIcould deepen the kiss.Theirmouth opened, andIexplored them with my tongue.Iwas quickly drunk on their taste.Theirsoft tongue played with mine, and each meeting exploded with long overdue satisfaction.
Theircallused fingers moved over my skin with such reverence it felt like worship.Theytraced the crests on my ribs and across my stomach.Ipulled our mouths apart becauseIneeded air, my blood racing so fast that there was nothing left in my lungs.Avlynmoved their lips to my neck, each kiss spreading over my skin like ripples in a pond.Theirfingers traced swirls beneath my belly button until they came to my hips, following the shape of it down between my thighs.
Asthey brushed the sensitive skin of my inner thigh,Ishivered, andIheard them elicit a soft moan against my neck.Theymoved until that venerating touch pressed down on the bundle of nerves that so desired it… and feared it.
Mywhole body flinched, and my heart stopped.Itried to moan, to move to cover it up asIwould have before, butAvlynknew.Theypulled back immediately.
“It’salright.I’mfine!”Itried to grab their neck and pull them back to me, butAvlyngently grabbed my extended hands, locking our fingers together and holding themselves away.
