Iwandered down to the barracks, looking for the commander.Iwasn’t exactly sure what had brought me there.I’dknown ofAvlynfor many years; their presence at theDragonKing’sside was a constant.Inever had much contact withAbraxas.Ihad always feared him, but he wasn’t here.Avlynwas, and they were not at all whatIhad expected.
Islowly made my way down the halls deep within the castle.Therewere no windows this low, but torches lit the roughhewn surfaces, and soldiers milled about, chatting and roughhousing.Afew gave me passing looks, but no one stopped me.Iwasn’t entirely sure whereIwas going or whyIwas even headed there.Youknow why.Yes,I’dseen that look onAvlyn’sface, the fear in their heart that their body did not belong to them.Iknew that feeling well, and it drew me.
Iturned a corner and saw the bruteKaleosleaning against a wall.Hestood up straight when he saw me. “Mylady, canIhelp you?”
“Yes,Iwas looking forCommanderAvlyn.”
Heturned to lookat the door across the hall. “Thecommander is in there, but they are withOryx, and… well, they aren’t receiving visitors.”
Iwasn’t surprised.Torihad been mumbling in the library aboutAvlynrefusing to see her.Luckily,Ididn’t think this brute would be too hard to get past.
“Ineed to see them;I’mchecking on any lingering effects of magic.”Aneasy lie.
Hiseyebrows shot up. “Oh, yes… well, then… go in,Iguess.”Tooeasy.Istrode past him and pushed open the wooden door.
Thecommander had their own private room.Itwasn’t large, but the stone floor had been covered in rugs, and a few comfortable—if unrefined—chairs sat around a low table where cards and dice were strewn.Thecommander sat on the bed, with the red-headed healer checking on them.
Avlyn’samber eyes moved to me asIentered the room.Theylooked much more suspicious than the brute had.Oryxstood up and went to the door, giving me a friendly smile before leaving without a word.Thecommander andIwere alone.
“Whatdo you want?” they asked.Theirvoice was strained, and they still held themselves rigidly.Theirhands ran over their legs, still fearful that they might disappear at any second.Itwould have been easy to snap back at them, butIhadn’t come here to be antagonistic.
“Iwanted to see how you were doing.”
“Justfine, thanks.Now, if that’s all…”Avlyngestured to the door.Iignored them.
“Ineed to see if you have any magic lingering from your change.”
Avlyn’seyes narrowed, but they did not stop me asIapproached.Iwas lying, but only partially.Icould sense residual magic.Itwasn’t a gift, just a skill from growing up in my mother’s labs, always surrounded by magic.Iknew what it felt like.Itleft a sweet taste on my tongue and made the hair on myarms stand on end.That’showIknew something had changed aboutTori’snecklace that night inKoron.Iwasn’t sure what its magic was; the glamour on it had been expertly woven, butIcould still sense it.
Isat on the bed beside the commander and slowly moved my hand to hover over their legs.Iwasn’t surprised to find no residual magic.WhateverToriandJunhad been able to do together was seamless.Regardless,Ididn’t stop my hand and found myself leaning in closer.Theroom was quiet, with no sound except for our breathing.Icould still smell how the salt air clung to them.
Avlynplaced their hand on top of mine, gently pushing it down so that my palm landed on their thigh.Ilooked up and saw that their face was very close.Werethey…
“Doyou feel anything… amIgoing to change back?”No, they weren’t being forward.Theywere terrified.
Igave their thigh a gentle squeeze and let it linger. “No.Idon’t sense anything.Youdon’t have to worry.”
Avlynlet out a long breath, and the tension left their shoulders as they leaned forward to hold their face in their hands.Iinstinctively started rubbing their back.
“Ihaven’t seen magic in five hundred years, andI’vealready had enough.”
Icontinued my ministrations. “Butthat’s not true,Avlyn.Youhave clung to your magic all this time.”
Theyhuffed, “Morelike it clung to me.Yousaw;Iwas never any good with it.Ipreferred to ignore it whenIcould.”Theylaughed, “Althoughit did help me save the princess’s life once.”
“Andmine as well.”Avlynsat up straight and finally turned their face towards me.Theirfull lips pressed together tightly, andIleaned into them more. “Younever wanted to use it?Younever wanted to see what you could do?”
Fora long time, they said nothing as their gaze neverwavered from mine.Ifelt their leg shift under my hand like they finally realizedI’dleft it there.
“Italways called to me… the sea.WhenIused my magic, that call was almost impossible to deny.AndwhenIchanged, it was allIcould think about.Iached to dive beneath the waves and just disappear into the depths.”
“Whydidn’t you?Youmay not have the chance again.”
Theirjaw clenched. “Iwould have never come back,” they stated simply. “Ican’t do that now.Ihave to stay here and fight forAbraxas, forTori.”
“Butyou want to go.”
“Ididn’t until today, andIhate that a feelingIhad no control over or desire for pulled deep in my gut.Haveyou ever wanted something with every fiber of your being that you knew you couldn’t have?”
