My family was in trouble. My parents insisted that I stay somewhere safe while they dealt with a problem from their past. They thought nobody would look for me here. We were far from where we’d lived before, and Earth was one of the last places an angel would seek refuge. The place was forbidden and other angels weren’t very forgiving about disobedience.
“Someone bad was after my parents,” I explained. “They didn’t know about me. My parents were supposed to meet up with me when it was safe. I was supposed to wait here.” I looked around at the empty lot. “Well, not at this exact spot. You know what I mean.”
This plan? I hadn’t exactly been on board. But they had been so scared. I’d never seen them so worried. And they weren’t willing to budge, they weren’t going to do anything if there were a chance I’d be caught in the crossfire. The only trouble was…
“I was here by myself.” When I sounded particularly dismayed by this, I squeezed Lysander’s hand. “Earth is great! I, um, I kinda fell in love with this place.” And some of its people. But that happened later. “There was so much to see and do. I hadn’t even left America and there was still more I wanted to explore. But my parents were taking longer than they thought. I was getting worried and…”
"Heaven is so close," Frost filled in.
“They made me promise not to visit, not to even try.”
This did not surprise Frost. "No angel on Heaven is an individual. They’d never let you stay one. To them, making you part of the angelic chorus would be a kindness, they’d consider it where you belonged."
My parents didn’t say that in so many words, just that it was really dangerous and we might not be able to see each other ever again if I went.
"If something was wrong, I started thinking maybe the other angels would help us. If I just explained and reached out…” I’d also been undeniably curious since I hadn’t been to the planet before or grown up with other angels besides my parents. “The longer I stayed here, it was only a matter of time until I gave in."
These weren’t exactly my favorite memories since I spent much of my early days on Earth alone with no idea what happened to my parents. But talking about this time wasn’t nearly as difficult as I might have guessed. Remembering after being in the dark for so long was like a gift.
"How did you get injured?” Frost asked. “Did you try contacting other angels for help?”
"No, I wasn’t exactly injured. But you were right about me being weakened. Here, look.” I stood on the graffiti in the parking lot, on the ‘X’ next to the message that said‘U R here.’
Closing my eyes, I reached out and felt everything rushing back inside me. I held out my hand where a scar rested on the back between my thumb and index finger.
When Lysander helped me stabilize myself, it was kind of like starting over. Becoming something new, an angel with a little trace of fox shifter and the earth. Most of the scars on my body from my time with the Brokers had healed when Lysander and I joined. This one hadn’t, which obviously meant something. I felt it finally disappear as everything I stored here rushed back.
Lys felt it too as he reared back like he was stunned and sucked in a sharp breath. “What just happened?”
While I hadn’t been injured when arriving on Earth, I wasn’t at full strength when the DSA found me. Some of my angelic power had been stored here. So I had been weaker than I should have been, though not because of injury as Frost assumed. But weak enough for the Broker’s magic to harm me.
“Angels are beings of connection,” I explained, echoing the words Frost once told me. “Any physical form we take changes, but the connections with other angels are always with us. Our ties can’t be severed.” This was supposed to be comforting. No matter the distance traveled, the connection to the chorus of Heaven never wavered. “Angels can communicate with each other across great distances, but if you were to disobey or not come back when called…”
"Then they can use these connections to locate you?” the fox shifter filled in.
“Yes,” Frost confirmed, staring at me intently as the pieces came together for him.
Lys figured it out too. “But you guys both found a way to unlink from the other angels?”
“No,” we both said at the same time.
“But you can kinda separate or hide yourself?” I continued. “The connections can’t be removed but you can redirect them and set up a decoy basically. If someone tried to search for me, the trail would end here and they wouldn’t find anything else.” I still had a connection to it, the scar, but everything linking me to another angel led to here instead of to me.
If any of this surprised Frost, he failed to show it. He touched a point on his chest. “I did the same thing when I left Heaven.”
"So why didn’t you realize I’d left my power here?"
"I had no idea you werecapableof storing more.” Frost looked mildly surprised, which seemed to freak Lys out since he wasn’t used to the other angel expressing emotions. “I never knew hiding oneself was truly possible or could be taught, not until I was taught. I never even considered leaving power behind, if someone ever found it…"
“My parents taught me how to hide the connections to other angels, I just modified their lessons. I kept most of my power here, so that I wouldn’t have the power to travel there, to Heaven. I uh, clearly, put too much away since then The Brokers…"
Only small portions of my power had remained, which occasionally allowed me to do something like stopping the coven, traveling as a spirit, or reading Lysander’s soul. But I stored more here to avoid temptation.
One night I’d been so close to recovering my powers and seeking out others in Heaven. I even went to the parking lot and stood on the X. I threw myself away before anything happened, not careful about where I landed. The wrong people saw me appear out of nowhere and sold me out.
Then because I wasn’t at full strength, the Broker’s magic was able to infect me. Once it found a way inside, expelling the unfamiliar taint of their experiments would have been challenging enough already, but I had no hope when incomplete.
Both returning here to restore myself or bonding with Lys could have helped me stabilize. I could have had Frost take me here after that asshole Kyle. I wanted to merge with Lysander instead. This was my home. I wanted to belong here and to be connected to Lys.
