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His hands pressed together for a second on the table. Then he seemed to regain his focus. ‘How do you feel about that?’
He wasn’t looking at her. Her heart missed a beat, then started doing somersaults in her chest. Part of her was praying he wasn’t about to suggest something more between them, part of her wishing that he would.
‘What do you mean?’ Her mouth seemed to go into overdrive. ‘That will be fine. You staying is what’s best for Finn. It will give you a chance to get to know each other more.’ She held up her hands casually. ‘And work? That’s just work.’ She narrowed her gaze. ‘We get on well at work, don’t we?’
He looked a bit amused. ‘I just wondered what you’d say.’ He gave her a playful wink. ‘Unless I’m buying you hot chocolate you seem to avoid me. Now that you’re my emergency contact for Finn...’ He let his voice tail off as he kept smiling at her. ‘Thank you for saying yes. It means a lot. He knows you. He trusts you. I trust you.’
She blinked. It almost felt like diving off one of those high Greek cliffs over the perfect sea. That sensational plummet. There was nothing romantic about this. No promises or intentions. But there seemed to be a huge amount of unspoken words hanging in the air between them.
She’d thought he was attractive from the start. She’d deliberately tried to keep him at arm’s length. And her instincts had been right, because being around Riley Callaghan was tougher than she had ever imagined.
Just being in his company made her wonder about the brush of his skin next to hers. It sparked memories of the hug—that she’d initiated—and the reminder of what it was like to be close to someone.
She missed it. But it felt amplified around Riley. Because his company was so much more appealing than anyone else’s.
And it was ridiculous, but an icy glove had just wrapped around her heart. After her feelings earlier around Finn it all seemed too much.
Her mouth was dry. She stood up, picking up her plate and cup. ‘It’s fine, providing I’m free and available.’
He smiled. ‘Planning any month-long holidays in the near future?’
She shrugged. ‘You never know. Things can come up.’
She kept her back to him and started washing up. The I trust you statement wasn’t giving her the warm glow it probably should. And this wasn’t about Finn. None of this was about Finn.
This was about her and how mixed up she was about everything.
This was about the fact that for the first time in a long time she’d started to feel attraction and a pull towards another human being. And it wasn’t just that it didn’t fit in with her plans.
This was all about Finn. Just like it should be. The only reason Riley was staying in one place now was because of the unexpected arrival of Finn.
He wouldn’t have stayed here for her. No, he would have been on that plane to Sierra Leone, probably with a sigh of relief and a smile on his face. Riley Callaghan would just have been a doctor she’d briefly worked with at some point.
But was that really what she wanted?
Riley appeared at her side with his cup and plate. It seemed he’d managed to eat the cold cheese on toast after all. ‘I’ll take Finn home now,’ he said quickly. ‘Thanks for looking after him. I appreciate it. How about I pick you up on Saturday and you can help us pick a Christmas tree? I think it would be good for him. He’s already said he wants you to come with us.’ He let out a short laugh and looked at her cardboard box. ‘Maybe you want to trade yours in? Or buy some new decorations for your hidden stash?’
He had no idea. No idea of the crazy thoughts that had just pinged about her head and her heart. She moved into self-protection mode. She could do this. She could make completely inane conversation. She could find a way to make a suitable excuse.
‘Oh, I’m not sure. I was going to do some Christmas shopping. Try and get a head start on things.’
Riley had already walked through to the main room. ‘Well, that’s perfect. You love Christmas. I love Christmas,’ he said easily. ‘You can do your shopping at the garden centre.’
For a second she was stunned. She hadn’t quite been ready for that one.
He pulled his jacket over Finn, picked him up and walked over to the front door. ‘See you later,’ he said as he opened the door and walked out into the foyer.
April was a bit stunned. Her plan was to say no. Her plan was to create some distance between herself and Riley.
She closed her door and sagged against it.
She was becoming more confused by the second.
* * *
He’d almost said something. He’d almost hinted to her that maybe they should reconsider their relationship. What relationship? He wasn’t even capable of having a relationship. At least, that was what Isabel must have assumed since she hadn’t even told him about his son. He was still struggling with that.
It was just, for a few minutes today, he’d looked at April sitting across the table from him and been overwhelmed by the sadness in her eyes. That was why he’d pressed her. That was why he’d been quite pointed.
He liked her. He more than liked her. If he was being truthful, he might actually care. She was a good person. She was the only person he’d considered when he’d realised he couldn’t get to Finn.
But even before Finn, even before he’d realised the enormity of being a dad, there had still been something about April. He could remember, as clear as day, that overwhelming lift he’d felt when she’d appeared in the pub and he’d thought, for just a second, she might actually have come to see him.
And she had. Just not in the way he had hoped for.
When he watched her with Finn it was like a little clenched-up part of him just started to unfurl.
He knew he should only concentrate on his son. Finn had lost the person that he knew best. Riley was playing rapid catch-up. And sometimes feeling like a poor replacement.
But April was constantly around the edges of his thoughts. And she had a shell of her own. He knew that. He could tell. She was doing her best to keep him at arm’s length.
It was almost as if they were doing a dance around each other. He liked her. She liked him. Sometimes when their gazes connected he could see the sparks fly. Other times he could almost see her retreat into herself.
And she’d hinted at something today. As if she might be going somewhere in the future. At least that was what he thought. Was she considering another job? Would that mean she wouldn’t be around?
That thought sent a wave of cool air over his skin.
He just didn’t know what to do next.
The more time he spent with April Henderson, the more time he wanted to spend with her. She was infectious. And being in her company made him happy. Made Finn happy. He wanted to act on the pull between them—but did she?
He already knew he wouldn’t sleep tonight. He’d be too busy watching over his son. It didn’t matter that, as a doctor, he would say it wasn’t necessary. Right now he wasn’t a doctor; he was a parent.
He also knew that April was going to haunt his thoughts tonight.
He’d watched her try to make an excuse for Saturday but he’d already decided he wouldn’t listen.
Chipping away at April Henderson’s armour was helping him chip away at his own. He just wasn’t quite sure where it would lead.
CHAPTER SEVEN
EVEN THOUGH IT was early afternoon, the sky was already darkening and the lights from the garden centre twinkled in greeting to them. Finn pressed his nose up against the window of the car, sending steamy breaths up that smoked his view. ‘Is this where we get the Christmas tree?’
April nodded. She’d spent the last few days trying to make up an excuse not to be around Finn and Riley—each of them more pathetic than the one before. Her stomach had been in a permanent knot for the last few d
ays. Finally, she’d realised it was almost like being a teenager going on a first date. Mallory used to tease her relentlessly about it. April had nearly always been sick before a first date, whereas Mallory had walked about the house singing.
And as soon as she’d had that thought, she knew she was going to go.
She smiled at Finn. ‘They have lots to choose from. You’ll find the perfect one.’
Riley opened the door of the car for Finn so he could climb out. The car park was busy; a group of children were crowded around the outside display—Santa’s sleigh being pulled by reindeers.
‘Look!’ gasped Finn as he wriggled free of Riley’s grasp and ran over to lean on the barrier. He stretched to touch the carved wooden reindeers. The largest one was just out of his reach. April looked around and gave him a bump up, so his fingertips could brush against the roughened wood. ‘I touched him!’ Finn squealed excitedly. ‘I touched Rudolph!’ April laughed as she let him down. Sure enough, someone in the garden centre had painted the nose of this reindeer bright red. Finn pulled her down towards him and whispered in her ear, his eyes sparkling, ‘Are these the real reindeers? Do they come to life on Christmas Eve so they can deliver all the presents?’
April glanced conspiratorially around her. ‘What do you think?’ she whispered back. Finn’s smile spread from ear to ear. Riley was standing behind them with his hands in his pockets.
