Just as I turned to follow Maggie inside, my phone rang. Shit. It was the Stag Pub number.
“Hello?” I asked, already knowing what I was going to hear.
“Hopper, sorry to bother you, but your dad has been in here drinking all day. We’re getting hit with the night crowd, and I really can’t serve him anymore.”
I swore under my breath. The door opened behind me, and Noel emerged onto the porch.
“I’ll come get him,” I said. “Sorry for the trouble.”
Noel looked at me as I ended the call. “Everything okay?”
“My dad,” I said tightly. “He needs a ride home from the pub.”
Noel wasn’t dumb. He put two and two together. “I’ll come with you.”
“No,” I said quickly. “Not your problem.”
“It shouldn’t be your problem either,” he said. “Are you okay?”
I was so used to brushing off my feelings about Dad that Noel’s genuine concern hit me hard.
Why did Dad have to give up on life? Give up onme?No, I wasn’t okay. I was so tired of calls like this one.
“He’s just pissing his life away, and I hate it,” I ground out.
Noel laid his hand on my arm. “Has he tried to get sober?”
I shook my head. “He doesn’t want to be sober. If he’s sober, then he’s got to face everything he lost.”
“You both lost so much,” Noel said gently. “That must have been so hard.”
I nodded. “I get so frustrated with him that he won’ttryto get better or to move on. If I could just figure out how tomakehim care. I should do more, but?—”
“It’s not your job to fix him,” Noel said. “I know you love him, and it’s okay to keep loving him, even if he’s flawed. But don’t blame yourself for his problems, okay?”
“Yeah. I know I shouldn’t get so angry.”
Noel rubbed my arm. “Oh, I didn’t say that. It’s also okay to tell him you deserve better than this.” He paused. “It’s his choice to keep drinking, not yours. You don’t have to keep doing this if it hurts you.”
Was that true? My dad was a drowning man who refused to get out of the ocean. The Grisolds had been my life preserver. But could I walk away and leave my dad behind?
“I should get going,” I said reluctantly.
“I could go with you,” Noel said. “For moral support.”
“No,” I said. “I got it.”
He seemed to understand I didn’t want him to see my dad that way. Or to see me wrestling with my anger and embarrassment over the situation.
He kissed my cheek. “Drive safe. I’ll keep a bowl of soup warm for you.”
“Thanks, Noel. You didn’t have to make that for me.”
He shrugged. “I think you deserve good things in life, Hopper Kelly, even if it’s just a savory bowl of soup.”
He was too sweet. To think that I’d found Noel irritating as hell when he first arrived. Now, he was my lifeline just as much as his parents were. Maybe more. I could talk to him in ways I could never talk to them.
And Noel had given me a lot to think about on the drive over to the pub. His words were like permission to set myself free.
