I wave my hand. “Thanks for trying to make me feel better, but I’m done. Congrats to me for winning the challenge.”
“Are you sure you just want to give up? You hardly even tried.”
“Yep. I know what I want and what I want is book romance. I don’t need or want the real thing.”
He opens his mouth to say something, but then shuts it and frowns.
“Thanks for trying to help, though,” I tell him. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“I just don’t think you should give up.”
I raise a brow at him. “Why do you care?”
“I refuse to believe that a book could ever be better than real life.”
I step closer and pat his chest. “Well, believe it, buddy, because it’s true. Men in books are perfect and guys in real life…aren’t.”
“I’m not sure if I should be offended.”
“No guy will ever match a book guy, so there’s no point in trying or feeling bad about it. Most girls picture their perfect guy, but he can’t exist in real life. Only in books.”
“So you think this William Knight dude has a monopoly on what it means to be a perfect guy?”
I lift my chin. “Yes.”
He holds up his hands. “All right. I’m not going to argue with you. Consider the challenge over.”
“Good. I need to get back to Vinn.”
“Who’s Vinn?”
I grin. “A sexy spy.”
He tucks his helmet under his armpit. “I don’t want to hear about this. See you tomorrow.” He walks toward his apartment.
I rush back to my dorm, slide under the covers in bed, and continue the book. I end up reading for hours, not really paying attention to Raven when she comes in or takes a shower or goes to bed. I force myself into the shower, then I’m back under the covers and finishing up a sci-fi romance. Who knew robots could make a good romance?
When I’m finally ready to sleep, I toss and turn because my thoughts are keeping me awake. Now that I don’t have books to distract myself with, the truth creeps up on me. I made it seem like I’m perfectly okay and over Axel, but I was just lying to myself. It hurts that he dumped me, and no matter how many books I read, they can’t assuage the pain.
It’s not only him—it’s the reality. I’m not what guys want. Damian claimed I’m giving up too fast, but he doesn’t get it. I only gave up because I’m preventing myself from going through this again. I suspected guys in real life wouldn’t like me and Axel proved I was right. Not to mention every guy I tried to talk to treated me like second class.
Maybe that’s why I hid in my room all weekend. Because I didn’t want to deal with the truth.
I really doubt there is anyone out there for me.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Damian
Sophie doesn’t crack a real smile once as she chats with her friends in the hallway after classes have ended on Monday. Heck, she barely smiled all day.
She made it seem like she was over Axel breaking up with her, but I could see through the façade. She was hurt. And in order to deal with the pain, she read her books to make her happy.
I don’t know why she’s doing this to herself. Why doesn’t she want to try with another guy? Doesn’t she hope that there’s a guy out there for her?
But if she doesn’t want to try again, that’s not my business.
I go to the library for the lesson and she joins me a few minutes later. She puts on a fake smile, but I still see the pain in her eyes. As I study her, I realize it’s not only the guy that has her upset. It’s the fact that she can’t find romance in real life.
