“Yeah?”
“When am I going to see you again?” she asks and I hear the tears in her voice. I don’t know if they’re leftover from her joy at Patience’s name or if they’re there for another reason.
“I don’t know,” I reply honestly, but quickly add, “I hope it’s soon. Very soon.”
“I want to be in Dublin for a few weeks. To spend time with Patience, and also Jake is coming into town. And then at the end of March I have to go to Barcelona for a job, and shortly after that I’m in London for a week. Of course, you could come back to Dublin with me?”
Her eyes are big and full of hope. My heart is heavy and full of regret.
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea. I don’t know how long it’s going to take Jessica to recover,” their gaze drops to the ground. “Or even if she will properly recover.”
“I understand.” Maeve nods. “So, April?”
I wince. “I’m directing a couple of scenes to shoot here in Vegas, and one in Reno. And April is Mom’s and Jessica’s birthdays. I’ve booked us all a week in Palm Springs.”
“Ah, that’s super nice.”
“I hope so. If Jessica is well enough to travel.”
“She will be,” Maeve says confidently, and I know it’s as much for my benefit than anything.
“Okay, so how about May?” I ask.
Maeve makes a face. “May I have two short trips in Europe and then I’m supposed to go back to New York and work with that agency again for like, a week. You could meet me there?”
“Yes, I could,” I say but even I can hear how lacking in enthusiasm my voice is. Because I don’t know if I want to spend time with Maeve in a hotel room, as good as my memories of doing this are. I want to have her in my own space, or be in her space, with her.
“June?” Maeve asks.
“June is good for me,” I say but it’s not good. June is three months away. I barely survived the six weeks we were apart previously.
“Shite, June isn’t so great for me. Arabella and I are going on holiday together. It’s been, like, nearly a year in the planning. Two weeks in Croatia. I can’t cancel on her.”
“No, you mustn’t,” I agree.
“So, July?” she asks and her voice is a defeated as I feel.
I put down my brush and wipe my hands with the cloth I have tossed over one shoulder. “Here’s what we’ll do. You’ll come to Palm Springs with me, Mom and Jess. I was thinking about inviting Taylor anyway so let’s make a thing of it.”
“That’s in April, right? Okay, that’s not so far away.”
“And in May, I’ll come to New York when you’re there,” I add. I’m an idiot to let us being in a hotel room stop us from seeing each other.
“Yes. Please.” Maeve gets up and moves toward me and I step away from the easel.
“We’ll make it work,” I tell her. “Even if it’s just weekends here and there. Even if it’s going to single-handedly ruin what’s left of the ozone layer.” Maeve grimaces as my hands slide around her waist. “Even if it never feels like enough, we’ll make it work.”
“And speaking of work,” Maeve places her hands on my chest, “I want you to know I’m okay with you continuing to work. And also doing stuff, you know, the sex stuff. With other people. We haven’t talked about it—”
“And we don’t have to now,” I interrupt. “I haven’t slept with anyone else since we got together.”
“Really?” she asks, surprised.
“Really,” I confirm.
“But I don’t mind. Well, I mean, I don’t expect you to stay celibate, while we’re apart. It’s your job and also it’s… you.”
“What do you mean?”
