“Damn. That sounds hot. Most guys are so wham, bam, thank you, ma’am. It’s like, um, hello. I have needs too.” She pointed a perfectly manicured nail at herself, and I laughed.
“Seriously.” Her expression was contemplative. “Who knew the younger manny would take things slow?”
Oh god. I’d kissed the manny.
I groaned, sliding my hands forward so my head was resting on the table. “What is wrong with me?”
“Girl, there is nothing wrong with you. It’s biology. Your body is wired to seek out a potential mate. And Preston is hot, young, and great with your kid. Of course, you’re going to be attracted to him,” she said, as if it were really that simple.
I hadn’t ever really considered having more children. Not that that’s what this was about, but now that Lauren had mentioned it, my mind automatically went there. And Preston—I had a feeling he’d want kids, or at least want the chance to decide.
I pushed myself up, meeting her eyes, which were kind, understanding. “But I don’t even want to have more kids. I love Soph, but I’m getting too old to have more babies.”
“Too old,” she scoffed. “Says who?”
I groaned. “Everyone.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “Bullshit.”
“Okay, well, even if you want to ignore prevailing medical research regarding the risks, I’m still too old for him.”
“And again, I say, bullshit.” She stared at me, hard.
She could be unrelenting. It was something I valued about her in business, but as a friend…
“He’s what—six years younger than you?” she asked.
“Nine.Nine,” I said again, sobered by the fact. “When he was born, I was about to start middle school. When he was being potty trained, I was going through puberty.” My chest tightened. “When he turned twenty-one and could legally drink, I was…” I couldn’t breathe. “Thirty.”
“Sweetie.” Lauren placed her hand over mine. “Alexis,” she said in a calm but firm tone. “Take a deep breath. A few deep breaths.”
“Oh my god. What am I doing?”
“Right now, you’re freaking out,” she teased, but I didn’t laugh.
What the hell was I thinking? Was this some sort premature midlife crisis? What was next—a sports car and a boob job? My life was spinning out of control.
“Alexis,” Lauren said in a stern tone. I snapped my eyes to hers. “It’s going to be okay. It was just a kiss.”
Just a kiss? Ha! It was so much more than just a kiss. It wasthekiss. The best kiss of my life. With a man nine years younger than me. With my daughter’s nanny. I was turning into a perverse sort of cliché.
“Okay? No, this is not going to be ‘okay,’” I said, using air quotes. “Things have been so awkward since.”
And I hated it. I hated that I missed his smile. I hated that I missed his flirting. I hated myself for wanting to kiss him again.
“So, talk to him,” she said.
“And then what? He could quit, and then I’d be really fucked.” My eyes went wide as another thought occurred to me. “Oh my god. What if he tries to sue me for sexual harassment?”
Lauren rolled her eyes. “He’s not going to try to sue you. He likes you. And besides, you said he initiated it.”
Yes,I thought, remembering back to that night.But only after I’d asked him to kiss me.
“This is such a mess.” I buried my face in my hands and shook my head. “And this is exactly why I don’t mix business and pleasure. Sophia adores him, and I need his help.”
She was quiet for a moment, sipping her drink as she nodded thoughtfully. But then she got a gleam in her eye, and I knew I wasn’t going to like whatever she was about to suggest.
“So, treat it like a business proposition.”
