In a family of strong healers, being ordinary is an insult. A disappointment. I’m the one who couldn’t live up to expectations. The oldest daughter and yet so mediocre. My parents have never said so, but I can see it in their eyes, the letdown that I am. My siblings love me, but I have never been able to stand on par with them.
It hurts more than I can put into words.
So, when our alpha hauled my friend and me to this palace as scapegoats, I begged my parents not to try to defend me, knowing they would pay the price. At least my life would be worth something if I could save theirs. I remember my mother weeping as Daciana and I were dragged toward the portal.
I haven’t seen them since. Astra offered to invite them to the capital, but all I’ve done is send letters in which I keep reassuring them how happy and settled I am here. I have not gone to visit them because I know they will see the misery that is etched deep within me and realize something is wrong. They think I’m living an amazing lifehere at the palace, working as a royal healer. Of course, it was my loyalty to Astra that got me my position.
My feet pound the forest floor, branches tearing my clothes and getting caught in my hair. I can’t see through the tears streaming down my face, can’t breathe past the sobs that keep ripping from my throat. My wolf is howling, a broken sound that echoes through my mind, through my very bones.
“Too weak. Too inadequate.”
Seth’s words chase me through the darkness like predators. Each one finds its mark, embedding deeper with each lurching step.
“Weak men for a weak woman. At least you know your place.”
I crash through another thicket, thorns scratching my skin, drawing blood I can’t even feel. Nothing hurts worse than the ache in my chest. My heart feels like it’s been torn in half and set on fire.
My legs give out near a stream, and I collapse to my knees in the soft earth beside the water. The celebration continues in the distance, music drifting on the night air like it’s mocking me. No one is following me. Nobody will come looking for me. They probably haven’t even noticed I left.
Seth certainly won’t check on me. Not after what he said. Not the way he thinks of me.
I press the heels of my hands to my eyes, trying to stop the tears, but they keep coming. My wolf whimpers, curled up small and wounded inside me, and I understand exactly how she feels.
“Why?” I whisper to the darkness, to the moon, to whatever cruel fate decided this was my destiny. “Why give me to someone who hates me?”
Astra had no wolf for most of her life. No wolf at all! And Lucian still claimed her, still loved her, still chose her above everything else. But me? I have a wolf—weak as she may be—but my own mate thinks I’m not worth his time.
He has made it clear in multiple ways, even in public. Three months ago, when there was an attack on a pack near the eastern border by the faction of the Umbra Council that is determined to retain purity, some of the royal healers were sent to help. I wasincluded in that team. Our leader, the healer in charge, told me to tend to Seth. But when I approached him, he looked at me with those cold, green eyes and demanded someone else. Humiliation burned through me as I backed away, the other healers watching, several soldiers witnessing my rejection. They didn’t know why he’d dismissed me so harshly, but the shame of it followed me for weeks.
That was the moment I knew for certain that we would never be together.
I’ve spent the past three months trying to move on. Trying to convince myself it doesn’t matter. That I can find happiness elsewhere, with someone who actually wants me around.
Tonight was supposed to be about that. About living my life instead of waiting for a man who will never claim me.
Darren was sweet. A little clumsy, sure, but he made me laugh. He looked at me like I was worth looking at. When he asked me to dance, and then when he suggested we get some air away from the crowd, I said yes. I was ready to say yes.
I thought that maybe if I were with someone else—anyone else—I could forget about Seth for a while. Could pretend the mate bond didn’t exist.
But then, he appeared like some avenging demon, throwing poor Darren into the bushes like he was nothing. The fury in Seth’s eyes, the possessiveness in the way he grabbed me…For one stupid, hopeful moment, I thought maybe he’d finally realized what we could be.
I was so wrong.
“If you want to whore yourself out, Selene, then do it.”
The words echo in my mind, and I double over, another sob tearing out of my chest. How could he say that to me? How could he be so cruel?
I’ve seen him with other women—how his eyes light up when they approach, how he laughs and flirts and becomes the sweetest man in the world. He’s charming, warm, everything I wish he could be with me. But when he looks at me, all I see is coldness. Disappointment. Disgust.
I’ve always been quiet, never one to raise a fuss ordemand attention. When I first realized Seth was my fated mate, I was so happy. Terrified, but happy. I thought maybe fate had finally given me something good, someone who would see past my weaknesses and love me anyway.
But then I noticed how he avoided me. How he would cross to the other side of a room when I entered. How he would cut conversations short if I approached. At first, I was confused, then hurt. Slowly, the awful truth began to dawn on me.
He wasn’t happy with our bond.
I kept waiting for him to reject me properly, to make it official so I could try to move on. But he never did. He just ignored me. Like I was a problem he hoped would disappear if he pretended it didn’t exist.
Maybe that’s why I finally snapped tonight. Why I threw his reputation back in his face, called him a man whore. I wanted to hurt him the way he was hurting me. I wanted him to feel even a fraction of the pain I’ve been carrying for months.