Grant
He looks up at me and I can tell he’s holding onto his emotions by a thread. That means more to me than anyone would realize. He’s not someone who shares his feelings at all. “I want youto move fast. Make me feel it ‘cause I’m so close to coming. I won’t last much longer.” I get it because I’m about ready to explode. He feels so amazing and is the first man I’ve ever been bare inside of. I pull almost all the way out and slam back in, starting a rhythm that’s fast and hitting his prostate. The noises he’s making are only getting me closer. He yells out, “Coming!” I watch him come, it shooting all over his chest. Holy shit, he came without touching his cock at all. I pound into him a couple more times before I roar with my orgasm, filling him up. His body still shaking underneath me. I can’t help but kiss him. This was more than I ever expected to happen tonight. Both of us are breathing heavily, but once I find my voice, I ask him the only thing that matters. “Are you okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” Those steely eyes look back at me with a look I can’t remember ever seeing. He gives me a huge grin. “That was…so much more than I could’ve ever imagined. Think I might have died when I came.” I can’t help the chuckle that comes out, causing me to move and slip out of him. I kiss him again. “Good. I’m glad you feel like I do.” He shocks me again with a cheeky smirk. “Let us recover some, and I’d really like to suck your cock. I really wanna have it in my mouth.” I kiss him again and get up to get something to clean him up. “It’s all yours, anytime you want.”
Coming back with a towel, I clean us both up, get back into bed, and pull Erik into me. I’ve been trying to figure out how I want to ask what’s been on my mind for a while now. He gets me outof my head. “I can hear your brain working. Ask whatever it is you wanna ask. I’m a pile of mush right now, and figuring out a non-answer is too much fucking work.” I squeeze him to me and can’t help but smile at his words. “I’ve been wonderin’ a couple of things, but mainly, I was wonderin’ what it was in that magazine all those years ago that got you so excited. Was it like just naked guys posing for pictures like the girls are inPlayboyor what?” He covers his face as soon as I ask the question and grunts. “How did I know that was gonna be what you wanted to know?” I reach over and pull his hands down. “You know you don’t need to be embarrassed or ashamed of anything with me. I know you’ve kept all of this buried for a long, long time, but you don’t have to anymore. Now, I ain’t gonna push you on it, but just know I’m here for anything you wanna share at any time, as I ain’t planning on going anywhere, and if I have any say in it, you ain’t either.”
Erik
Get the fuck over yourself and just tell him. He ain’t gonna kick me out of the house or nothing. I sigh and squeeze his arm that’s around me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt more comfortable or a feeling of being home than I have in the last couple of minutes. “No, I’ll tell you…it’s just kinda lived in my head since then. Lately, I’ve read some books with it in it, and it’s definitelysomething that turns me on.” Here goes nothing. “It was a series of pictures that depicted a scene…a scene where one guy dominated his partner. I don’t mean like he was whipped or in a collar or anything—not that there’s anything wrong with that, but that’s not what it was. The one guy was definitely in control and told his partner what to do, and in my head, he might have had to call him sir, but mainly, it was the taking charge that turned me on.” I can feel him go a little stiff next to me. “Which part turned you on, the being in charge—” I interrupt him almost instantly. “Good gods, no. It turned me on to be the one being told what to do. Now, I don’t think I’d like it in all of my life or to live a whole Dom/sub life, but that aspect instantly turned me on. The idea of not having to make a decision and just be,reallyappealed to me. Now, I don’t think I could do that wholedaddything like that one guy you dated ‘cause that just ain’t me or what appeals to me, but—”
It’s his turn to interrupt me. “That wasn’t me. That was what he wanted.” He moves to adjust us in a position where we look at each other. “What you’re talking about is music to my ears. I crave being in charge. The idea of having you submit to me…that’s a huge turn-on. I don’t need to be in charge of your whole life. That doesn’t appeal to me. Though I will say something if you aren’t eating or taking care of yourself, but that’s more ‘cause I know you and know you get in your head and forget that shit.” I can’t deny that because history would be on his side onehundred percent. “I might do that sometimes, but it’s not like a daily thing.” He raises his eyebrow at me. “So you’re telling me you didn’t get sucked into work today and work through your lunch break?” How the fuck could he know that? He shakes me a little. “I know you. I know you get working and don’t bother to think about taking care of yourself. Well, now some of that is gonna be my job. I ain’t gonna demand you change your life or have a bunch of rules, but I do have a couple.” Why does the thought of him having rules make me start to get hard again? Listen, dumbass, he’s still talking. “One is honesty. I ask you a question, I expect an honest answer, even if it’s not the answer you think I want. I want you to be open to just answering a question without worrying about my reaction. Your answers don’t need to be thought out or calculated for every single question.” It’s like he’s known me for forever or something. Fucker. “Okay, I’ll work on it. I can’t promise I’ll be good at that one right away. After all, I’ve had years of needing to be careful with my answers.” He kisses my forehead. “I know that, and that’s all I could ask. I also know, for the sake of all the shit that’s going down with your divorce and Celeste, that we’ll need to keep this quiet for now. I’m okay with it too ‘cause we’ve got nosey as shit family and friends. I want time for us to just be us without all the noise around us.” I couldn’t agree more. “My other rule is pretty fucking simple. You’re mine. I don’t fucking share. I’ve waited long enough. I think that this can’t be casual,and I’m not okay with you seeing anyone else.” I wouldn’t think of it. “Same goes for you, though. I know you’ve always dated a lot, but I can’t handle seeing you out with another guy or even a woman. You gonna be willing to be with just me, no woman in the equation?” Grant grabs my chin so fast I can’t even react before he’s right in my face, and I’m forced to look him in the eyes. “You’re who I want, just you.” He kisses me and moves to get out of bed. “You’re more than enough, babe. Now get up and let’s shower. I’ll change the sheets. Seems we made a mess, and I know neither one of us is gonna wanna sleep in it.” He’s not wrong so I follow and get up, but I’m not gonna be distracted either. “Okay, but I still wanna suck your cock.” He busts out laughing at me and grabs my hand. “I think we can work something out. Showers can be lots of fun.” He wasn’t wrong.
CHAPTER TEN
I love how you have a favorite coffee mug at home and at the shop and that both came from your kids when they were little. They’re old and fading, but I know you’ll never replace them till you get one that says Grandpa on it.
~Text from Erik to Grant
Grant
The last few weeks have been more than I could’ve hoped for. We’ve managed to have almost every evening to ourselves and enjoyed some quiet nights at home. Well, quiet in terms of visitors. Erik isn’t so quiet when I’ve got him on his knees, taking me from behind. Turns out he can be pretty vocal and I love all the moans he makes. Yep, just quiet nights at home.
Today isn’t going to be the same, though. I’ve got a decent-length appointment for a good-sized piece this morning, and then I’ve agreed to watch little Gracie so Shane and Kierstie can go out to dinner. She likes to sit and listen to my words of wisdom,and as her godfather and great-uncle, it’s my right to impart my knowledge.
I walk into the kitchen to start the coffee. I hear the shower start, telling me that my man, who’s so not a morning person, must have gotten up with only his second alarm this morning. I think yesterday he was up to hitting the snooze at least five times. I make a full pot because we both drink a couple of cups, and I know if he’s going to work, he’ll take another one with him. I have a little more time till my appointment, so I get stuff out to make some eggs and potatoes. I don’t think the bin of potatoes has been close to empty since Erik moved in, since every time he goes to the store he buys more.
The coffee maker's noise tells me the pot is ready. I stop chopping the vegetables because, well, coffee. I pour myself a cup, black just how I like it, and I pour a cup, leaving room for a splash of half-and-half. I just got the carton out of the fridge when I feel a presence behind me. “Mornin’”. He really isn’t a morning person before coffee. I turn around and see that he’s looking at the coffee pot. I hand him the carton, and he pours it into his coffee and sets the carton down. I let him get in a few sips before I lean forward and give him a kiss. “Morning. I’m gonna make us some breakfast. You goin’ to the office today?” He shakes his head. “Nah, I got a meeting with my lawyer, then I was gonna go help Jeremiah work on his bike for a bit. I’mcaught up at work, so I’m probably not gonna go in till Tuesday since I’ve been pulling full-time hours the last few weeks.”
I get all the potatoes in the pan with some onion and peppers, and I hear him cracking the eggs before he scrambles them. “Well, it’s been an awesome week so far with just us, but tonight we won’t be alone. I offered to watch Gracie for Shane and Kierstie.” He sips his coffee again before speaking. “You know she’s my great-niece too. She’s definitely a much calmer baby than her mama was. You telling me ‘cause you want me to clear out for the night or something?” What the fuck? “Fuck no, you live here. Just ‘cause we might not be tellin’ everyone about the fact that you sleep inourbed every night doesn’t change that. I just was lettin’ you know what I agreed to.” I reach over and grab his hip and pull him into me, kissing his neck. “It’s called communicating. I know the she-devil, whose name I refuse to say anymore, didn’t do that, but you and me? We’re gonna communicate the shit out of things, okay?” I can feel him chuckle in my arms. “Yeah, I get you.”
We finished breakfast. I had to finish getting ready for my appointment and grab my sketchbook with the drawing for my client. This is a repeat client, so I know they’ll be able to knock this one out in one session most likely, as long as my hands let me do it.
I don’t know where Erik went, but then I hear clanging and banging outside. I grab my jacket and my truck keys so I’mready to go. I’d love to ride my bike, but I know with that long of a session, my hands will be screaming at me if I try to ride afterward. So the truck it is.
I head out, and I hear him grumbling before I can see him looking in the backseat of his truck. “What are you looking for back there?” He turns toward me. “I swear I had a brand-new socket set back here that I was gonna give to Jer, but I can’t find it. Maybe I put it in the spare room with the boxes.”
I look over his shoulder and see the box from up the mountain still in his truck. “Have you opened that to see what’s in it?” He glances over to what I’m looking at, and I can tell he’d totally forgotten about it. “You know, with everything that’s gone on, I forgot it was back here.” Well, shit, I’ll admit I’m nosy. “Open it, babe.” He lifts the lid and pulls out a couple of manilla envelopes. He sets them to the side and picks up some pictures. He hands me one. “This is Mamma with her parents. I think it was her and Father’s wedding day.” He picks up some more pictures and looks through them. “These are from when we were babies. This is Linnea when they brought her home. I don’t know if I was walking yet or just holding on to her carrier for dear life. My first birthday was a month later.” He hands them to me. “Holy shit. I never realized just how much both boys look like you. I mean, Leif it’s obvious, but with Jeremiah, his features are more…well, in this photo, I can tell he’s totally got your eyes.” He takes out one more picture. “Actually, I think he gets a lot of hisphysical features from Father. Luckily, personality-wise, they’re worlds apart.” He reaches in and pulls out some stones. “These are Larvikite. It’s the stone that she gave to me and Linnea when we were in high school. It’s a moonstone, but she gave it to us because it was supposed to help us stay connected with the earth, to keep us grounded and not lose our way.” I do remember his mom being more of a mystical and healing type and definitely home-remedy kind of person. “She kept extras just in case?” I can see he’s counting them as there seem to be quite a few. “Holy shit.” He looks up from the box and looks like he’s in shock. “What? What is it?” He looks back at the stones. “There are exactly nine stones here. Enough for each of her grandkids. It’s like she knew.” I can tell this hits him in his feels. “You gonna give them out?” He nods. “Yeah, I’m gonna show Sis and then give them out.” He grabs one of the envelopes and opens it, pulling out a bunch of legal-looking documents. He looks at the first one and starts reading it. After a couple of minutes, his eyebrows go sky-high. I have to ask ‘cause like I said, I’m nosy. “What is it?” He rubs his hand over his face before he responds. “You know how they’ve sold off bits of the property up on the mountain, but the acreage around my parents’ place they’ve kept?” I nod and let him continue. “Well, I don’t think they made that decision because they kept the best lots or anything. I think they sold only the ones that were actually in Joseph’s name. It looks like the others, almost forty acres, were in my parents'name. Wait, no, they were only in Mamma’s name. She named me the beneficiary of the property. She bought this and didn’t put Father’s name on it. Sheknew. She knew if she had, he would’ve left it all to Joseph since he would’ve said that’s what Joseph’s vision supposedly said.” He flips a couple more of the pages of the document. “Guess I’m gonna have to deal with this shit at some point. I don’t want it, but I doubt whoever’s left up there can afford to buy it from me. I may take this to Max to see if he can help with it or if he knows someone who can.” He looks over at the other envelope. “I’m kinda scared to open it. Who the fuck knows at this point what’s inside? Is it pictures, their will, or something saying I own two oxen and a mule?” He never exaggerates at all, does he? I think I successfully avoid rolling my eyes at him but nudge him along. “Alright, Mister Oregon Trail, just open it already.” He opens it and takes out a packet of paper similar to the first one. I wonder if it’s just another copy. I get my answer not even a minute later when his eyes go bigger than I’ve ever seen them. “Holy shit. Oh my...fuck! What in the…?” I grab the papers from him and start to read. “I mean, what in the…how could...I mean, fuck!” Erik paces and still rambles as I read the document. Well fuck me. I set the papers down in the box and go to stop Erik from pacing. He’s still mumbling the same thing over and over. “Oh my fuck…I mean, just holy shit…oh my fuck.” I grab his wrist and pull him close to me, trying to get him to stop rambling and his pacing all at once. “Hey, look at me.” He listensand lifts his head up to look at me. “You and I are the only ones who know what’s in that box. No one other than Jonah and Jon even know it exists and I’d bet my life they wouldn’t have any idea that something like that is in there. So this is what we’re going to do. We’re gonna put that box in the spare room and leave it there till your divorce is finalized. Once that happens, we’ll bring it to Jonah and see what he thinks, maybe even Max and Jon. But until then, let’s pack up the papers, put them back in the box, and put them away. Okay?” I watch his body relax a fraction as he nods and answers me. “Yeah, okay. That’s a good idea. I mean, it’s not really hiding something ‘cause until five minutes ago, I had no fucking clue that any of this existed. You’re right, it’s the best plan. I don’t love hiding stuff from Jonah and the guys, but it’s the right move.” Good deal. “Okay, are you alright? Do you need me to reschedule and hang here with you today?” I know he’s going to be fine when he immediately rolls his eyes at me. “I’ll be fine. I’m gonna meet with my lawyer and get started on the day, and you’re going to go give someone an outstanding tattoo. You get going, so your customer ain’t waiting.” I give him a kiss goodbye and head to my truck. Hopefully, the last ten minutes will be the most eventful part of the day. Fingers crossed.
**********
I’ve been working on this tattoo for a couple of hours and thinking of taking a quick break as soon as I finish this line. The customer is in the middle of his usual nap whenever he gets a tattoo that has him lying down on my table. I swear the dude could sleep through anything. Mick’s got a super talkative client he’s finishing up with. It’s days like this and clients like the one he’s working on with a shrill voice that make me thankful for the stereo system I put in all those years ago.
I finish the line, remove my gloves, stand up, and stretch my back. I’m grabbing a cup of coffee when the front door chimes as someone enters. I look to the door and see Saxon walking in my direction. “Didn’t know you were stopping by today, Son. Thought we were starting next week with you here.” He sits down in the chair next to my station. “We are starting next week. It’s just…” He sighs like the world is ending and slouches in the chair. I take a moment to really look at him. He’s got this melancholy look about him that I haven’t seen since right after he got out of the Army. “What’s really goin’ on? This can’t just be about work.” He sighs again. I know better than to push him to talk. Samson has always needed a push, but pushing Saxon just makes him clam up. “It’s just…everything. It’s work, it’s Samson, it’s Shandy.” He points to his chest. “I know in here, she’s the one for me, but I know Samson feels the same way, and I always come in second place to him in everything.” I’m about to argue that point because no, he the fuck hasn’t.He puts his hand up to stop me. “I don’t mean with you. You always treated us equally. I mean, in life. Shit always seems to come easier to him. In his work, he found his passion quickly, but since I got out of the Army, I’ve just felt…I dunno, like I’m wading through water, and I’m going against the stream. Things just seem harder. Then we both meet Shandy, and she’s just… There’s just something about her that both riles me up and calms my soul. I know Samson feels the same, only he’s like the dark, deep thinker, so, of course, she’s gonna be drawn to him. Why wouldn’t she?” I interrupt him. “Son. First off, I don’t think your brother has things easier. I think he hides shit inside more. He just doesn’t share, even with me his frustrations and challenges a lot of the time. Have you talked to him about how you’re both feeling about this girl? Hell, have you talked to her?” He shrugs his shoulders. “No, I haven't talked to him about it. Lately, every time I talk to him, I wanna strangle him, so I’ve been avoiding it.” He rubs his face in frustration. “She won’t pick between us. She says she’s not gonna do something to drive a wedge between us. She’s a twin too, so she gets it, but she and her sister are always on the same wavelength. Samson and I—”
I interrupt him again. “Son, you two think you’re oil and water, but the truth is you’re more alike than you realize. I think you two need to actually have an adult conversation and talk about this shit.” He gets this look on his face that I can’t quite place. “I talked to Mick for a little bit a couple of weeks ago, and hesuggested something. I still don’t know what to make of it.” I put on a new set of gloves to get back to work while we talk. I must give him a look because he continues speaking. “He suggested that we grew up around an example of what Samson and I should do. He suggested we share her, like Jackson and Wyatt with Anna. He even reminded me that those two argue more than we do.” I start up my gun and get back to work. “Is that something you would be open to?” He gets up and pours himself a cup of coffee. “I dunno. It’s nothing I ever thought about before, but I can’t imagine that if I were to do that, I’d do it with anyone else but Samson. Fuck, I don’t know if he’d be open to it, or hell if Shandy would. I just…I just feel like there’s all this shit swirling in my head, and I just need to get away for a bit…maybe a weekend, a week…It’s just like I need to not be here for a bit.” Saxon may be louder and the jokester of my kids, but I think he’s also the one who struggles with his emotions the most. It’s always been that way. When he was having strong feelings as a kid, I’d often find him in his treehouse, needing to be away from everything and everyone.
“I think you need to have a serious sit-down conversation with your brother. I get you need to get away for a bit. You know this job is yours whenever you want it, but maybe just go for a few days. I don’t want to see you and your brother drift apart ‘cause you’re both hiding from your feelings. I didn’t raise you that way.” He nods at me, so I ask him. “Where you thinkingof going?” He sits back down but leans forward with his elbows resting on his knees. “I’ve been talking to a couple of Army buddies and think I might visit them. Yakov’s out in North Carolina. He’s said I can come visit anytime, but I know he’s surrounded by family all the time. It wouldn’t be a quiet visit, but it could be good. Forester has said I’m always welcome to come to Texas and see him. Hell, he said he’d even have a place for me to stay if I wanted to stay for a while. He’s always been good to talk to.” I remember both of the two he mentioned. I know he and Yakov are closer in age and were together from basic on, but Forester, being his company commander, was older and I think, taught my boy a lot. I know he needs to do what’s best for him. Before I can say anything, he seems to have come to a decision. “I think I’m gonna talk to Delilah tonight and maybe see about flying out next week, just for a few days. I know Samson’s gonna need some time to think shit through.”
My customer must have woken up at some point because he surprises both Samson and me as he speaks up. “I know you don’t know me, but I’ve been getting tattooed by your dad here for more years than I’d like to admit—since he did my first at eighteen. There’s one thing I think he’s been trying to tell you in your conversation, or at least for the part I was awake for. Talk to your brother ‘cause when you assume shit between the two of you, you only make an ass out of you and him. Shit, that’s not the saying, but you fucking know what I mean. I’m going backto sleep.” I can’t help the chuckle that comes out. Saxon lets a little one out, too. He stands up. “I’m gonna take off. You got big plans this weekend, Dad?” I tell him about watching Gracie tonight, and of course, we all have church tomorrow. He says he may stop by tonight, but he’ll let me know. He says his goodbyes and heads out. Gods, I hope he figures out his heart and doesn’t have to wait decades like me.
Erik
My meeting with my attorney went as well as could be expected when Celeste was trying to take everything and demanding alimony. Thankfully, my attorney, Colton, is adamant that we stand our ground. He knows she's asking for too much, especially since she could have been a bigger breadwinner than I could since she’s got multiple degrees. Degrees that I paid for. Colton seems to think that since, from the start, I was willing to give her the house and the money in the checking account, the judge will see that she’s just trying to be greedy and leave me with nothing. Luckily, even if she manages to get the savings accounts and some other assets, she can’t touch the investments Max helped me…allocate into areas that aren’t connected to my name.
I get in my truck in the parking lot of the lawyer’s office and take out my phone. I’ve got texts from three different people. I open up the first one.
Jonah: Your sister is going around the house talking about how you are finally getting rid of Celeste, and she sees you even less. Be a friend, brother, and stop by today or tomorrow if possible. My sock drawer has been reorganized twice this week.
Me: Yeah, I’ll stop by tomorrow before church. You know, she could just text me to stop by.
