“Okay. I’m pretty certain it was. And she’s not texting me back.”
“Why don’t you start at the beginning? I know you guys were having lunch today.”
“She told you about that?”
“Uh huh. Was pretty excited too. To tell you about the business idea and all.”
Shit. Shit. Shit.
I buried my head in my hands, mumbled something about not hearing much regarding the business and thought back to the entire conversation.
Looking up, I relayed it all to Jules.
“I honestly can’t believe I came here,” I said, realizing that I was sitting in Mae’s best friend’s office, at work, like a crazed man. “I couldn’t find Pia. And the guys are…”
“Guys?” she asked, sardonically.
“Yeah. That.”
“I’m glad you did.”
She seemed sincere. But I still could kick myself, for the whole day.
“I’m no therapist,” she said finally. “But I have been in a lot of it and know myself pretty well. Sometimes, asking questions about why we do the things we do are important.”
I waited, but that was all she said.
“Specifically, why are you sabotaging your chances to make this work?”
“I wouldn’t call it sabotaging, exactly?—”
My mother couldn’t have managed a sterner look, and she could be pretty stern. There was Mae’s mom, the warm and fuzzy type, and then there was the exact opposite.
Aka, my mother.
“Fine, sabotaging.”
Why was I sabotaging my chance with Mae? It didn’t take a genius to figure that one out, even without years of therapy or whatever.
“I guess I pretty much laid it out to her when I said people like her don’t stick around for people like me.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning, she’s too good for me. Always has been. And don’t you dare deny it. I’ve never been boyfriend material.”
As expected, Jules didn’t refute it.
“Alright, so one could argue you’ve been sabotaging your chances with her for a long time. Why?”
“I have to think about that one.”
“Okay. That’s a start.”
“So you don’t think I should try to talk to her yet?”
Jules tapped her nails against each other, thinking.
“No. I don’t. Not until you know the answer to that question. Because if you don’t fix it, you’ll end up doing the same thing again for another reason. I’ll tell her you came here. She’ll know you care. Actually, Mae already does know that. But in order for the two of you to work, you’ve got to get on the same page. If you’re waiting for her to walk, that’s not good for either of you.”
