“It’s the best,” I reply. “I’m sad I won’t be home for the holidays this year. My brother’s kids are the best.”
“Are you close with your brother?” he asks before stuffing a ridiculous amount of his burger in his mouth.
“Yeah.” I keep adding mustard until the balance is a true two parts ketchup and one part mustard with a thick black pepper coating. I miss my brother and sister so much. This last year, Ryan got married, and his wife will have their baby by the time I come home from my next deployment.
I had just stopped in D.C. on my way to a training in Virginia a few months ago. It was good to catch up with him, but I didn’t get to meet his wife. There was some drama going on at the time, but he didn’t tell me much. Then, his daughter, my beautiful, teenaged, sassy-mouthed niece, told me he had been shot, but Ryan never confirmed.
Amelia, my sister, I haven’t seen in ages. She’s also a pilot and training for the space program. I hope she makes it. Amelia is far more determined and much stronger than I am. I’m a great pilot, but she’s truly amazing.
“You know that’s actually pretty disgusting,” he says, and I look up from my plate.
“What?”
“What are you mixing over there?” he asks, pointing a fry of his own at the mess I made on my plate while I was thinking about my family. I feel my cheeks heat with embarrassment. I know I won’t see him again after today, but still, I should have better manners than a five-year-old.
“It’s ketchup and mustard,” I answer with a shrug.
“I see that.”
“Hey,” I defend. “Don’t knock it until you try it.”
He watches me for a moment before replying, “Then show me.”
He doesn’t make a move to reach for a fry, and I wait and wait. When it’s clear Kyle is waiting forme, I pick up a fry from my plate and drag it through the mess and then hold it up in offering for him. He leans in and closes his lips around my fingers. But it’s when his tongue briefly touches the pad of my index finger that I gasp. He leans back, chewing my fry, and then winks at me. He winks! The entire series of movements is positively carnal, and I don’t know what to do with it. This entire weekend, it’s been like I was living someone else’s life. It’s like an out-of-body experience.
“I stand corrected,” he says.
“You like it?” I can’t help but ask. I don’t know why it’s important; I just know I want him to like me—not for who my family is or what I do, but I want Kyle Garrett to like me for me, MacKenzie Black.
“I more than like it,” he answers, and it feels like he’s talking about more than mustard on his fries. It feels like he’s talking aboutme.
“Me too.”
“So how long have you been stationed here?” he asks.
“This is my second year with this squadron, but Cinco, Hooter, and I have been together since flight school,” I tell him.
“Is that common?”
“Yes and no,” I answer. “We’re a small-ish community, so usually we come and go, but the three of us have been together for a long time. How long have you been here?”
“A little bit longer than that,” he says cryptically.
“If you tell me, will you have to kill me?” I ask and then instantly regret it. I don’t want him to think I’m making fun of him.
“Something like that,” he says with a wink.
We take turns asking questions back and forth for the rest of lunch. Finally, I toss my napkin on my plate, and Kyle settles the check before asking me, “Ready to go?”
“Yeah.”
He leads me back out of the restaurant, and he takes my hand in his. Silently, we walk up the hill to the best lookout point to watch the sea lions. I love it up here, but it’s crowded with tourists. The number of bodies pressed together in one place seems to make Kyle a little edgy, so I lead him back down the hill and toward the jetty.
We walk out to the end of the jetty where not many have ventured this afternoon. It’s still a little cool today, and the tide is in. Waves lick up the bottom of the walkway and spill over. I shiver when the sea spray and cool breeze hit me, and he wraps his arms around me from behind.
I happily sink into him and watch the gulls fly over and fish swim just under the water. I take snapshots of this moment in my mind. I want to hold onto these memories when I’m overseas. It’s moments like this I’ll treasure when I’m all alone in my cot. When Kyle and I part ways later, I wonder if he’ll know just how much this weekend meant to me.
After a while, he leads me back up the walkway and to his truck. We don’t speak as he drives me back to the bar that we met at. Our time together is over. I thought it was nothing more than a night, and it happened to stretch into a weekend. I should be happy. But why do I feel sad?
